Lesson 4: Home Preparation
Family Interaction
“Objects, of course, are not the only educational things around. Younger children, especially, are usually eager to do whatever they see their parents or other adults doing–from routine chores such as cooking, cleaning, and gardening to hobbies and crafts such as quilting, building models, and making music. Working or playing alongside older family members or friends, kids learn not just the specifics of a particular activity, but more general skills and principles: project planning, cooperation, problem solving, time management, budgeting, responsibility, and so on.” - Mary Griffith, author of The Unschooling Handbook.
People to learn about and from are just as important as materials, if not more. You and others in your home are learning models for your children. For example, when your children see you reading and writing, they may become interested in doing so also, or at least in understanding why you do those things. Because children are growing into adults, they are constantly learning to be adults. They’re watching you and other adults in their lives. So, provide them with opportunities to take part in adult activities such as house chores, errands, hobbies, etc.
“For most unschooling parents, learning becomes something they do along with their children. Sometimes the entire family gets caught up in some topic, often for extended periods. Often the kids will be intrigued with something they see their parents doing and get involved themselves, but almost as often the parents are drawn into unexpected topics by one or more of the kids.” - Mary Griffith.
Parents, as well as siblings and others in the home, will spend some time participating in games and projects, and other times simply being available to answer questions or help in the pursuit of a child’s interests or the solving of problems. Younger children will likely ask more questions because they don’t yet know how to find answers for themselves. When you don’t know the answer to a question, show your children how you go about finding it.
“Asking a question is not simply formulating a question and waiting for someone to supply an answer. It’s also figuring out what kind of answers are needed, how deeply a subject needs to be explored, whether the first answer leads to the new question and new topics, and how the answers relate to what is already known.” - Mary Griffith.
Children will, at different times, prefer solo or group activities, structured or unstructured activities, focused learning or imaginative play. Sometimes your child may prefer to follow her own interests, other times she will be curious about yours. Take your cues from her. You can certainly offer information or suggest an activity, but if she resists, let it go until another time.
Focus on being your child’s parent, not her teacher. She wants you to be a parent, to be yourself, to do what you do. This is what she wants to learn from you. When she has interests that you know little or nothing about, help her find people who do know about those interests, not necessarily teachers, but real people who do that work or that hobby or whatever it is because they love to do it.
Friends, relatives, and homeschooling support group members may pool their expertise to offer to all the children in the family or group. Everyone has an area of expertise be it computer programming, auto repair, carpentry, or domestic work.
Mentoring is usually a volunteer relationship in which a mentor provides support and guidance to a less experienced mentee. Organizations such as the National Mentoring Partnership, http://www.mentoring.org/ offer general information on mentoring and information on becoming or finding a mentor. One definition of a mentor is ‘someone to help you get where you want to go.’ Big Brothers, Big Sisters, http://www.bbbsa.org is another mentoring program. On-line Learning Relationships Lab, http://www.telementoring.ca/ offers free telementoring software.
“Wherever two people live together in this kind of comradeship, giving and receiving mutual help, there real education is in progress. The place of books is, therefore, secondary. This idea troubles many people, who think that if the place assigned to books is reduced the students will be deprived of the most valuable tools of knowledge. Books do have a place as tools of knowledge, but it is a very minor place. The major need is for teacher and student to become work-partners, and this can happen only when the distinction between the teacher ‘teaching’ and the student ‘learning’ can be overcome.” - Vinoba Bhave, an educational philosopher born in the Indian state of Maharashtra in 1895, identified by Ghandi as his spiritual successor.
