Lesson 7: Pregnancy and Nature
In this lesson you'll learn by example...nature's example. By looking at the courting, mating, pregnancy, and parenting among other species we begin to understand that humans are not the natual examples of childbearing. In fact, we may be the exception to the rule.
Nature Part One
I’d like to talk about a topic that many would consider irrelevant to pregnancy. However, looking at courtship, pregnancy, and parenting in nature offers a contrast to our complicated lives. Studying these patterns among other species provides a different perspective about the everyday challenges humans face giving birth.
Your pregnancy may not be a walk in the park but let’s take a stroll through nature anyway. You’ll find some interesting tidbits of information to share with your husband or at the next gathering of friends; while you’re wearing your new pair of shoes. When we study the behavior of animals and insects sharing this planet with us, we discover many of interesting things about courtship, selection, mating, and parenting. It’s simple to think of every creature following in our footsteps. Males are males and females are just that, female. Males are the predators in relationships and females are the prey. And when it comes to parent, mothers are “mothers” and “fathers” are fathers, right? Well it should be so simple.
We are the only species that has continual expectations and problems with the mating ritual, courtship and relationships - other species have the program worked out and get along fine. Even insects that kill their mates’ right after mating know the rules of the game and faithfully stick to them. No cocktail warm-ups, no need for a cigarette afterwards, or concern for the amount of noise they make.
Helen Fisher, Ph.D. provides a wonderful description of species mating in Anatomy of Love.
Take the octopus, for example. It’s a simple animal with a tiny brain. But octopuses never argue about male and female differences, sex or what led up to it, who should call whom or when, did either of the pair forget about a special occasion, or should sex be procreative or recreative. The female comes into heat at a certain time and all of the male octopuses crowd around waving their tentacles; she picks the one with the tentacles she likes best and gives him the green light. She never accuses him of not paying her enough attention, and he never worries whether it was as good for her as it was for him. There are no interfering in-laws giving advice and the female octopus doesn’t worry whether she looks fat, and she never yearns for a mate with a “slow” tentacle.
But humans are infinitely more complicated than mollusks. Put the words “relationships” and “sex” into your Internet browser and you’ll currently get over 50,000 references in English alone to help you to improve things. Click on one of these sites and you’ll have a subscription for life to some “favorites” that will be difficult to explain to your kids, much less your partner.
For all other animals, relationships are a fairly straightforward procedure driven by each species’ survival needs. They don’t think about it. They just do it. We, however, have evolved to the point at which we now need manuals on how best to attract, get along with, and maintain a relationship with a member of the opposite sex. Without these “how to” books and magazine articles, we’re made to feel that we’ll never stand any chance of living happy lives. Countless magazines aimed at men and women readers fill their pages with articles offering advice on how to grab your fair share of fun, excitement and enrichment that only a good relationship can bring. Of course the advertising found in these same “periodicals” offer the same bliss and hope by having you wear a particular pair of shoes or that “erotic evening” fragrance.
