Lesson 7: Family Independence
The Bottom Line
Remember: You know your child best. Base it on his/her needs/likes. If your child will be dangerous with a credit card, just give him/her access to a debit card. If s/he never used loose leaf in his life, don’t buy it. Some items that my kids required might be taboo in your family. The reverse is also true. It is not necessary to get everything on the list. Get what s/he needs and you are both comfortable with. HINT: It doesn’t hurt your budget as drastically if you purchase a few items every shopping trip or every week for the entire 2 months prior to departure for college.
If your child doesn’t use it; don’t buy it. If some item is a “must-have” at your house, include it for mental stability, if nothing else. One section of the suggested necessities list includes all the items that can be shared among roommates. It makes for good friendships, less purchasing and packing and takes up less room. Some items, there simply isn’t room or the need for 2 of 3 of the same item.
Use common sense. Everyone needs their own change for the vending machines; each roomie needs a laundry bag, but most items can be shared. It’s a lesson in life for those teens who have always had their own room, electronic equipment and personal space. Welcome to dorm life!
The Comfort Zone While most first aid supplies, sewing & tool needs can be purchased locally, they don’t take up much space and it is extremely comforting to have cough medicine, as an example, in the room when you don’t feel well.
What To Wear Nowhere on the packing list do we include clothing. This is personal preference and will be based on the climate where the school is located. HINT: For those students who are in an area where the seasons change drastically in winter and summer, IF they will be returning home for the winter holidays (such as Thanksgiving/Christmas), it is preferable to save the truly winter clothing until the return from winter break home. (Saves space) In a like manner, spring break is the perfect time to swap the winter clothes for summer gear.
Streamline the Packing!
You might have to make a game out of it, but try to get your child to pull at least 3 outfits from the "Must Have" pile and leave them at home. Similarly, try to get them to weed out a few extra nick-nacks: stuffed animals, trinkets, etc. I'm not trying to get them to leave everything at home, but dorm rooms are notoriously small and are usually shared by at least 2 persons.
This will be a big adjustment for your child. Lots of American kids are used to their own room, with lots of space, and mom to pick up after them. That's not the case in the dorm. The bathroom is usually down the hall and shared by 20 other students, so all the niceties in the family bathroom at home (tweezers, Q-tips, shampoo, etc.) now has to be crunched into a small, carry-able tote for the trip down the hall. And your child now has to keep laundry supplies, late-night snacks and assorted stationery items in a room, that is shared, and usually tinier than their space at home.
Try to make it fun. Don't insist they leave home something they really want to take - for whatever reason they want it. You can always send care packages from home and they can always bring home, or ship home, unwanted items.
Don't be surprised if you come home with a carful of stuff they decided they didn't want in the dorm. You will also be making last minute runs to the local superstore for things they just have to have before you leave them at college!
