Creative Writing 101

Lesson 8: Lucky Dip.

Dialogue and Punctuation etc.

The main problem some people have with dialogue punctuation comes when quoted dialogue is included with the other kind. Where do the quote marks go? What about the comma or full stop?

In general, the punctuation mark comes before the close of quotes.

"I'm going," said Eve.

Not -

"I'm going", said Eve.

An exception is made when the dialogue contains both actual and quoted dialogue.

"In the book, Alan says; 'I went this day'," said Celia plaitively, "and I never know which day he means."

Punctuation can change the entire meaning of a line. Observe this old chestnut;

John where James had had had had had had had had had had had the teacher's approval.

Make sense? Try this version.

John, where James had had 'had', had had 'had had'. 'Had had' had had the teacher's approval.

"She's coming!" yelled Adam.

Adam yelled; "She's coming!"

"She's coming!" Adam yelled it as if the house were on fire!

Just to confuse matters more, some house styles call for "" for the dialogue and '' for the quotes within, and others reverse that.

More on Dialogue Punctuation.

When does dialogue make a new paragraph? That depends. If two or more people speak within a paragraph, the first speaker may be shown as part of the paragraph, while each subsequent speaker begins a new and separate paragraph.

On the other hand, the first speaker and each subsequent speaker may begin new paragraphs. It depends on whether the dialogue of the first speaker is an integral part of the narrative preceding it.

Observe.

John and Ellie were walking along the beach.

"I just thought of something," said John.

"You did?" Ellis sounded puzzled.

"If I were to ask you a question-"

"Yes?"

"And you were to answer it-"

Get on with it! thought Ellie.

"What would you say?"

Ellie frowned, climbing over the rocks at the end of the bay. This question wasn't what she'd expected. Not what she wanted. "How can I answer that?" she asked. "When I don't know the question?"

John grinned. "Dunno."

*********************************************

The first line is just a scene-setter, and so John's dialogue begins on the next line.

The bit where Ellie climbs the rocks and thinks about John's words leads naturally into her comment, so it comes in the same paragraph.

You should (almost) never have two people speak within the same paragraph.

"I don't want to go," said John. Ellie looked at him. "Why should you?" "Because Mum says so," muttered John.

You might render that as;

"I don't want to go," said John.

Ellie looked at him. "Why should you?"

"Because Mum says so," muttered John.

or, possibly, as this;

"I don't want to go," said John. Ellie looked at him.

"Why should you?"

"Because Mum says so," muttered John.

The first example is more correct, but the second *may* be acceptable.

Oh, and thoughts are not characterised by speech marks.

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