Beating The Odds

Top 10. Jun 27, 2002 1:15 PM

» NotWithMyTaxes - Too bad you have to lie about it

You're a fraud and a disgrace to real mothers who love our kids enough to wait until the time and circumstances are right to have them. How sad you have to go on-line and say things every single other real mother can say about her child, but you think you deserve a medal or some special commendation for doing the very least and accepting the least possible standards, for imposing the most unconscionable risks and overlooking the most important advantages every child needs.
Society failed the teen breeders who killed their kid? how do you figure that? We real parents don't depend on or expect society to support us as parents. We don't rely on or expect anyone to 'be there for us'. We are parents because we have already made the sacrifices and done the hard work all real parents do before having kids. You are nothing but a breeder - the welfare and interest of your child was the last thing on your mind when you conceived her. She will, of course, realize that one day. I hope you're prepared for the kind of resentment that children of teen breeders report feeling toward their parents when they finally understand 'mom' didn't think I deserved the advantages my peer with real parents have.
you're a disgrace to all the women who sacrificed so much to give us so many birth control options and reproductive freedom.

-- posted by NotWithMyTaxes

Top 11. Jul 9, 2002 7:17 PM

» kiyah123 - Re: Too bad you have to lie about it

In response to message posted by NotWithMyTaxes:

To: Not with my taxes -

I just had to reply after reading your message. I am appalled that a person like you has or may have children in the future. You sound like a disgrace to humanity. Any children you may have would do much better being adopted by Trula Breckenridge. Your children will most likely grow up to be hateful, judgmental and narrow-minded if they are under your influence for any amount of time! You sound not like a "real" mom, but a real egg donor.

-- posted by kiyah123

Top 12. Dec 26, 2002 9:49 PM

» Justice17 - Re: Thanks all

In response to message posted by Dasangel_:

Hi,

I got pregnant with our daughter when I was sixteen, at about four months in, turned seventeen and on October 30, 1995, delivered our beautiful and very smart little girl. smile

I was already engaged to my (now) husband before getting pregnant....although we definitely weren't planning it. We deliberately waited until she was close to fourteen-months-old to get married.

I got pregnant in January of my Junior year, stayed in school and when everyone finally knew, I only had a few issues with a few people and settled it real quick. smile All my friends stuck by, my whole family was supportive, my husband and his family and everyone in his school were fine and supportive. (We lived in neighboring counties and went to separate high schools.)

All my teachers were great. I stayed in my dance class and preformed at four months....not showing. Went to the prom. Then summer came, I was in a wreck while coming home from vacation and my Aunt fell asleep at the wheel, which caused me to stay in the hospital overnight....we were all very lucky and God was with us. Went to the Doddridge County Fair just before school started....some could tell by now, some couldn't. smile

Went into my Senior year and everyone seemed really proud that I'd stayed in school. I did meet a fourteen-year-old at the time, almost as far along as I, who was having trouble with one of her teachers not letting her go to the bathroom when she needed and advised her to go to the principle as he and everyone else were so understanding and supportive of me, they should of her as well. (I think it was just this one crappy teacher.)

As time approached, some of my friends would (politely) joke at how uncomfortable I must be and how it was the biggest they'd ever seen me....although I wasn't *that* big. smile But they were always supportive and were never mean.

I did have a little problem with the photographer for the yearbook who decided he needed to be backhanded....although I didn't go quite that far.

My Spanish teacher didn't even know I was pregnant somehow.

One thing I remember is that Justice liked to pinch my stomach between her foot and my desk and loved to lift up on my ribs.

Then the time came, I left school on "homebound" about three days before I was due....the day I was due, I played basket ball....my water "trickled" at 8:00 AM Sunday, we walked all day, went to the hospital and slept 'til the next morning, finally with the t.v. playing music videos and movies....oh and that wonderful epideral (?spelling?)....we delivered her at 3:09 PM. And yes, I say we, my husband (then fiance) Billy sat there, kneeling at my side, holding my hand, with tears streaming down his face before they gave me the epideral (?spelling?)....he almost made me cry. smile

They announced it at school and when I came back about eight weeks later, everyone was asking about her and telling me how much they loved her name (Justice Tamira McConnell Ingram), etc. My Literature class even sent a congrats card (while I was still out) that everyone signed, which I still have. smile

We went to the prom and graduated, although my husband didn't "walk" as his was the same day so he just got his diploma and came to watch me with Justice and the rest of my family. {His family was watching his sister "walk". smile }

I don't mean to sound like I'm bragging here but I just wanted to let you all know that not everyone's friends leave and not everything goes so bad.

I'm constantly watching my fifteen-year-old cousin and telling her I'd kill any boy who touched her but if anything happened we'd support her. smile

!!!! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year Everybody !!!!

Sincerely,
Chrissy McConnell

Maple Way
William H. Ingram, Jr. and Christina M. McConnell
"Chrissy & Billy"
Route 2, Box 30
West Union, WV 26456
(304) 873-2727
chrissy_mcconnell@hotmail.com
http://www.zyworld.com/mapleway/Maple%20...

-- posted by Justice17

Top 13. Apr 10, 2003 9:24 PM

» JH102399 - Re: Re: Too bad you have to lie about it

I am also very suprised that people like "Notwithmytaxes" exist. I was also a teenage mother at 16, but this in no way defines me as a person or a limited what I can do in my life. I can guarantee that my daughter has a much better life than the hateful person that decided to log onto this site and leave this horrible message. Let me tell you a little about my life. After 10 years my daughters father and I are still married and own a home in a nice community. I and my husband are both community volunteers and members of the Lions club. We both work full time jobs and I just graduated with a Bachelors degree. I am also currently in the process of obtaining my Teaching Certificate. In addition, I graduated with a 3.84 out of 4.0 GPA from college and was a member of an honor society. My daughter is the most well behaved, intelligent, and beautiful person that could ever exist. She is also very kind to others and is always concerned for others well being. She never had tantrums, hit or bit others, raised her voice to me, or disobeyed. We have never beleived in spanking or used it as a punishment and she is very well behaved. The world is a better place just for having her in it. She is currently being evaluated for an advanced instructional curriculum in her school because of her high intelligence level. One of her main aspirations in life is to be President of United states and we contribute every month to a college fund so she can go to a college of her choosing. She reads at a fifth grade level and is only in second grade, is involved in Girl Scouts, tumbling, baton, and plays baseball in the spring. My spouse is the nicest person, greatest father, hardest working, and most attentive husband I could hope for. I am involved in my daughters school and in her Girl Scout Troop as well. I am not sure what is considered the ideal family life, but I know that I am happy and I could not ask for much more. My husband and I were not just teenage parents, but came from very poor and unstable childhoods. We have worked very hard to get were we are and will continue to advance ourselves as parents, learners, and career people. Now, "Notwithmytaxes", we are only 24 and have come this far with our daughter by our side. How old are you and what have you done with your life so far. I surely hope you have enough money saved for retirement because I do not want to be supporting you with my tax money, or have you not thought that far ahead. I know we have. smile

To the other teenage moms who have left messages, I think your all doing great and we are all capable of anything we set our minds too. All it takes is motivation, a little hard work, and love of our child. People such as this narrow-minded person are just very unhappy with their life and need to release their repressed anger on what they think to be the weak, lower status people to make them feel better. This person must not realize that being a young mom makes you stronger and more responsible. We just need to keep breaking the stereotypes and help each other. After all, teenagers will continue to get pregnant and we need to be positive role models.

-- posted by JH102399

Top 14. Apr 21, 2003 9:48 PM

» skykennasmom - Re: Too bad you have to lie about it

In response to message posted by NotWithMyTaxes:

I realldon't't know what your problem is. I am a mom, a real mom. No, I don't want a medal for being a young momYourus ignorance just shows the obstacles young moms go through. We have to deal witsnidede remarks like yours. I am sad that you have no one there for you when you need support with your parenting skills. I guess that you were one of the few born to know exactly what to do with your children, and when to do it. For your information, my children are my life, and without them, I would be nothing. As for your taxes, I used not a penny. My husband and I work very hard to support our family. We both have Degrees form college and graduated in the top 3% of our classes. I am currently in school treceiveve my Masters Degree. We OWN a nice home in a great middle class neighborhood. So, you can be rest assured that my children don't have an ounce of resentment for their mommy or daddy having them at a young age.

-- posted by skykennasmom

Top 15. Nov 18, 2003 7:14 PM

» talk2much84 - Re: Too bad you have to lie about it

I am the child of a teenage mother and, as such, I can't even fathom how you can say such hateful things. You talk about "real mothers". My mother has always supported me, guided me, and made sure that I knew that she loved me. If that is not a "real mother", I don't know what is. No, she did not plan to have me or my older sister when she did but it has always been clear that she loves me infinitely. Also, it's obvious that this author is not bragging that she is such a great mother. She is just refuting the commonly held belief that teenage mothers are failures. She is saying that she raised her kids comparably to other mothers.
And "breeders"? The mentality that allows you to put up your nose and label people is the same mentality that enslaved black people! It is the same mentality that put pregnant teenagers in schools for the dumb for so long. It is the kind of outdated and ludicrous attitude that spoiled little brats take. And notwithmytaxess"? Come on! Lots of people from different backgrounds go on welfare. My mother has never in her life been on welfare or any such program. In fact, she owns her own business and makes $120,000 a year. Sounds to me like she's paying more of those taxes than you are. It also sounds like this author is not a deadbeat teenage parent but a successful editor.
And lastly, my mother is my best friend. I have never in my life resented her. On the other hand, I wouldn't be surprised if your heavy-handed attitude inspires some hate in your own children.

-- posted by talk2much84

http://www.privatefamilymatter.com/Teena...

Top 16. Nov 20, 2003 11:12 AM

» grandmasue - I was a teen mother too.

I was a teen mother too. It was very hard and I made a whole bunch of mistakes!

My advice is to learn as much as you can about child development and child psychology. Learn all you can about raising a baby, infant, child and teen.

I am a great grandma now and can tell you that love and responsibility for your child never ends! My daughter is 40, my granddaughter is 23 and her baby is 10 months. A mother's love never ends.

Love your child unconditionally and don't leave your child with any person you don't personally know. And don't allow others to bring strangers intochild'schilds life without your knowledge.

Stay away from a violent relationship. It isn't love! Love doesn't hit.

Grandma Sue

-- posted by grandmasue

Top 17. Apr 17, 2004 9:46 PM

» mom20 - Geez

You guys, I can't believe all the people who are so ignorant. I can't believe some of the things people have to say. She talks about "real parents" I don't know about you, but as a teenage mother a rule in my house, is if you can't say nothing nice, then don't say nothing at all. I guess her "real mother" couldn't teach her that.

-- posted by mom20

Top 18. Apr 17, 2004 9:51 PM

» mom20 - Re: Re: Re: Too bad you have to lie about it

In response to message posted by JH102399:

I so agree. I think some people that have views like that are so anger they are trying to lie to cover something up they are ashamed of everyone knowing. I am not ashamed of what I did, but I also don't encourage it either, and along with everyone else, I dont think we are bad parents, I think we are good "real parents" who love our children enough to do what we are doing.

-- posted by mom20