Teen girls dating older boys
- sweetkisses91
- laquinn916
- tjm18
- simpsonsplash
- lowalt9
- ebony17
- RealWorld55
- boobaby28
- cburum
- Lexiegirl18
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» sweetkisses91 - Re: A new fad?
I'm a female teenager and i know how it feels to have rules about dating and males in general.its true that guys are age aren't mature so we go for guys that are mature, its just not the cool thing to do. its not fair if you change the age from 15 to 16 just because shes into older guys then what happens when she 16 are you going to change the age to 17? let her try things for her own and if she gets hurt then shell no better but just by you telling her its not right she's most likely to rebel. that's the way I've learned. that's my advise.sweetkisses
-- posted by sweetkisses91
» laquinn916 - Re: A new fad?
When I was 14, I "went out" with a 17-year old. My parents objected, but that made him seem all the more attractive. I did all kinds of sneaky things to see him-that was the fun of it! When my mom finally gave up and let me see him (I was 16 at the time), it wasn't fun any more and 13 days later I broke up with him.I have a preteen daughter now, and I learned from my mom. If she starts seeing someone when she is older that I don't approve of, I'm going to invite the boy to everything and get to know him really well.
I think the best thing we can do for our kids is show them a healthy respectful relationship between married people. I feel like she will be missing something if a guy does not treat her well.
Another question to ask her is why she thinks this boy is seeing someone so much younger.Maybe he's insecure? Or maybe he thinks he can over on her. Points to pondure.
In response to message posted by atw1004:
-- posted by laquinn916
» tjm18 - Re: A new fad?
Hi,I'm a 38 yr old mother, I have sons. I remember when I was young and wanting to date...my advise would be to let her date this older guy,your daughter will go behind your back in more ways then u can imagine. so... get to know the guy, ask lots of questions,lay the law down to him, what your expectations are of him on how to treat your daughter, curfews, everything you can think of, insist on meeting his parents, invite the whole family to do stuff, let his parents know your concerns of their son dating your daughter.
Last bit of advise...get to know your daughter! if you have had a close relationship all these years she will be wise and make the right decision. But if by chance she doesn't...DO NOT rub it in her face that is the worst thing to do. Kids have to make mistakes, let them, kids think us parents have never been teenagers ourselves. be gentle. Good luck.
In response to message posted by atw1004:
-- posted by tjm18
» simpsonsplash - Re: A new fad?
In response to message posted by atw1004:what happens when it all goes a stage further,your 14 year old move in with your 16 year old boy friend,and his family says its ok
if you have any adviplzzzzzzz let us know
-- posted by simpsonsplash
» lowalt9 - I have a 14 y.
I have a 14 y.o.(immature for her age) that we moved out of state to spend the next 4 years with her father. Her father has always been a big part in her life. She and I have always disagreed. Since she has moved she has met a 18 y.o. young man who is a christian, involved in the church choir, starts on Varsity football team, a straight-A student and his dad is a preacher. This is my daughters real "friend". It is more than a friend if she "makes out with him". My ex-husband has talked with a therapist and the therapist recommends to let her continue seeing him b/c it will not last long. My ex has been setting rules by talking with both so they know what is allowed and not however my ex seems a bit more generous than I would. I cannot brooch the subject with my daughter b/c she says she doesn't want to talk about it. I have been praying that they break up but it continues to plague me. The young mans mother cannot understand it either according to my ex. If we allow her to continue to see this young man what sort of things should my daughter and I talk about? Any advice?-- posted by lowalt9
» RealWorld55 - Re: A new fad?
In response to message posted by atw1004:Dear atw1004,
You are dead on it. I have ayr5 yr old girl and I can understand your response to this issue. Everyone is saying that today's teenagers are developing at a much faster pace than we did. It is solely my option this is due to our society lowering its moral standards. I see all sorts of problems with anyr8 yr old young MAN dating youryr5 yr old girl. The writing is on the wall. All who read this response can fool yourselves by calling me old fashion, but NOyr5 yr old girls has any male FRIENDS. Just ask her DAD! (Wait a minute) I'm not stuck in the stone ages. I do realize they can share a totally innocent relationship. However, any teenage guy spending enormous amounts of time with any teenage girl is waiting for an opportunity. And I don't mean to take her to the church social. Ladies I know you find this hard to believe, but ask any guy. If you still think I'm blowing smoke, check the statistics of today's teenage pregnancies.
-- posted by RealWorld55
» boobaby28 - Re: why do younger girls like older boys
In response to message posted by ebony17:younger girls like older guys because that the fact that they are older makes them think that they are kool but not in all cases and because alot of guys there age are very immature and maybe cuz they act like two year olds for exemple they fart and burp all the time as if its going out of style well yeah anyways
-- posted by boobaby28
» cburum - Re: why do younger girls like older boys
In response to message posted by ebony17:It is the thrill of being in that forbidden zone, the guy can drive, the parties, the sexual adventure of an experienced male. Our family is dealing with it right now. I was young once also and I know.
-- posted by cburum
» Lexiegirl18 - Re: Re: why do younger girls like older boys
Not all girls like older boys for the same reasons. I am 14 and my boyfriend is a 17 year old boy....But it's different. I don't just like him because he is older...That has nothing to do with it. I like him because he is him..He just happend to be 3 years older....But I mean the fact is I like him for who he is, for every girl their opinion on guys are different. My boyfriend is a hockey player, he is a christian, he is smart and funny and he overally a wonderful person. But for every girl their choice about guys are different. And their reasons for being attracted to him can be different. I a lot of girls just like older guys because they are more mature, or maybe they are better looking or whatever, but before you just say no to your daughter consider her reasons for liking the guy and see if she likes him enough to have him come over for dinner sometime.You see.. I'm not really allowed to date yet. My parents are very protective, but since they are really good parents they are letting me see my boyfriend. Because they care about my feelings. They care about me being happy. What I love about how my parents have handled this situation is that they have taken in to consideration my feelings. And they set rules for my relationship with this boy. No alone dates. But I mean if your daughter is really into this guy, then she will agree to have him come over. My parents made the rule that he can come over to my house, and we all can go to family parties and things, and carnivals. But no alone dating. And if the girl isn't willing to have you meet the guy then she must not be very serious about him. If she isn't willing to let him come over and meet you, that usually means she is trying to hide something about him. But seriously, parents, give your teenager space, but not too much space. I have noticed that we aren't always ready to make the right choices, but when you try and protect us from everything, and never even give is a chance to screw up then we will never truly learn for ourselves. We will only be learning what you make us do, so what do you think we are gonna do right after we turn 18????? THE EXACT OPPOSTITE OF WHAT YOU TELL US!!! So give us trust, but at the same time, hold back, because if we screw up, then you can get us. After we screw up, and you get to prove that we make a bad choice, by making out with the guy or whatever then use that against us. Decide an appropriate punishment. But on top of that decide to use that against us.. For example: the next time we ask to go out with someone, or whatever, date anyone, or go anywhere alone, say no. And give good reasons tell them that what happend showed that they are irresponsible and they need to work hard to get back the trust they once had. But in all, always make sure that your not just saying no to your teenager, make sure you give us good strong reasons. Because if you just say "no" then it doesn't really tell us anything except we can't do what we want. If you give us good reasons that we can relate to then we are more apt to think about them and understand why you said no. Then we won't just go out and do what you just said not too. But always remember, protect your child, but at some point you have to test them. If they screw up. They learned a lesson. If they do great, then let go a little more, gradually. For example (LoL my mom has done this with me before, but I understand why)For example: If your child has been very trustworthy for a long time, and has recently asked you to go somewhere, unsupervised,consider everything, consider the saftey, make sure you know everyone who is going ect...But say yes for once and let your girl go..But in your mind decide to go and secretly check on your daughter,( you can either just show up and let her see you or you can do it in secret) to make sure she is where she is supposed to be, with who she said she'd be with and that she is behaving...This might alarm the girl, LoL I know it did when my mom showed up, but when I knew I hadn't lied to my mom, and I wasn't doing anything wrong it was a good feeling to prove her wrong lol. If your daughter hasn't done anything wrong, or wasn't planning to, then she shouldn't be mad at you for showing up, that is if she sees you. Another good piece of advice: If you think something is up with your daughter. Tell her you need to talk. Go in a room with just the parents and her. And seriously, very seriously say something like
"we know about what is going on with you, if you tell us everything then you won't get in as much trouble." Even though you don't really know they usually will just totally get uptight. But if they persist one saying nothing is wrong. Then Be firm and tell them that lieing won't get them anywhere. If they don't break after a while, then probably nothing is wrong. If you still think something is wrong. And you are seriously concerned then I guess you can take drastic action and just go into her room and look around a bit. Anywhere she could hide things. Maybe read notes she has, or a diary. My parents have never had to do this lol because I always end up telling them everything. Anyways, So beside everything make sure your teen knows your proud of them. Always tell them that your proud of them and you love them. Yes they might say yea whatever, but ya know what? Through these tough high school years, those " I'm proud of you" and "I love you" sayings really help us out. So make sure you do that! Anyways hope I helped everyone! If anyone needs anything, any more advice about teens and parent relationships, I'd love to help! Trust me if you are stuck I bet ya I can help. Just email me at Lexiegirl18@hotmail.com
I hope I helped!
response to message posted by boobaby28:
-- posted by Lexiegirl18
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