What Makes a Belly Dancer's Blood Boil?

» marie22 - Being Mad

What an excellent article. It is so true. People in the dance community can get on your nerve like everyone else. my problem is that in my area, some of the girls act so secretive about what they are doing. I mean you would think they were spies. In conclusion, It is an excellent idea to remember that you are dancing to have a good time. Try to be courteous of others and don't take it too personal. The other day in class, I had one young woman slam her zills into my hand. It was so painful. However, she apologized and I forgave her. We both felt good in the end. That's what counts.
P.S. Prayer, reverse undulations, and deep breaths always makes me feel better. much love and affections to all the beautiful dancers.

-- posted by marie22

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» LadyB - Re: Being Mad

In response to message posted by marie22:

Yes, WONDERFUL article. I'm new enough to the realm of bellydancing that I haven't encountered ALL of this yet, but I'll certainly keep my eyes open! Mostly I have the problem with another local teacher doing LOTS of advertising and really GOING for the SEX angle and posing in skimpy costumes and high black heels. Sets me up for doing damage control before I can get ANYwhere with new students. But such is life and yes, best we remember we REALLY dance for the LOVE of DANCING.

-- posted by LadyB

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» ghaziya - Being mad

I think belly dancing has several elements that make the field prone to some of these conflicts:

• There's Money Involved. People who really need the income from their dance jobs are sometimes very predatory, and some of them will do unethical things to protect it.
  
• The "Me" Syndrome. Those who dance because they want to be the center of attention will resent anything that gives the spotlight to someone else, even temporarily.
  
• Many Women Are Bad At Conflict Management. Many girls grow up not knowing how to manage conflict, whereas boys are more likely to participate in team sports where they learn the skills to manage disagreement. Read Betty Friedan's book Games Mother Never Taught You for further insights into this. I think this issue particularly affects women over 40, before the era of team sports for girls really blossomed to the levels it is today.

On the plus side, there are a lot of belly dancers who feel a true sense of community and work in cooperation to build more dance opportunities for everyone. I feel blessed to be in an area where there is such a sense of community despite the occasional difficult individual.

-- posted by ghaziya

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