My MOM and Manic Depression: Mother has bipolar

» hebber87 - Mother has bipolar

Hello im Heather a child of three by my mom and im 14.
i just felt like telling someone about whats going on in my life and kinda how i feel, because not a lot of people know or care..my mother lynn has been an alohoalic and drug user since i was vey young. thats what my g-ma says.
my baby brother was put in foster care soon after a year of birth . lynn thought it was time to get help so she went to a rehabibilation center . from there she had daily visits with my baby brother ( at this time i was cared by my grandmother since age of almost birth).she was doing great in the center till about 2 months after she would sleep in the room for hours , smoke when she wasnt alowed. a friend came to visit her and lynn was checked for drugs..they found drugs in her system and nicholas (baby brother) was sent to a foster home.

i am now 14 years of age and i have a baby sister.
my mother has been living with us for a while, off and on. sometimes when i wake up in the morning i see a beer bottle cap on the counter and i go check in my mothers room and she is not there.
Sometimes you could never expect these things to even consider to happen. When my friends are over my house with me having a good time they all love and get along with my mother..we're one big happy family. But they only see one side of her...the other is confusing in a way. Dating is not one of my mothers best things. she dates guys she meets from bars or you know. my mom is said to be around ghetto hoods and sometimes blacks. MY grandmother who is now 57 who has heart problems , has has past strokes..ect. When my mother leaves in the night my grandmother says she goes off to bars and gets drunk and whatever.
Sometimes she does not come home for weeks. my sister and i are then cared form that time until she gets home by my grandma. 3-5 days later she would call and explain what went on as like..im depressed, lonly, sad..lost a job....Although she does not have a home of her own, a job, car, money, and did not finish high school..she stays at this home ..my gradmothers (her mom) with my sister and i. My grandma supports us and my mother you can say. what i dont and will never understand it why she is depressed and has to get out with people who "she considers friends who get her drunk or whetever" Why cant she be happy that she has a home to come home to with her children ...thats all she needs, and also my g-ma lets her use the car for work shopping ..ect. My grandmother says that she has bipolar and the alochal is a trigger to these episodes., and that she craves drugs? im not to sure because i know my mom and i love her, i just dont understand that side of her..One time about 6 weeks ago at around late evening i was ready for bed and i seen my mother getting ready to go somewhere and i was getting upset because i thougth she was going out again..so i told my grandma and she told me to ask her and she went to the bathroom where she was and she said" Lynn your daughter is very upset here, i stepped in and started crying saying "mom how come you dont tell me anything, like at the last minute when your ride is here you say i need you to babysitt bye..and i would say when are you comeing home and you always promise soon..but you never do its always days at a time. she then said heather whats your problem! dont worrie about me! i am an adult im entitled to go out ! why do you always have to F*** everything up? this just upsets me but i must go now because my mom just came home from 4 days out~ bye god bless you all *heather*

-- posted by hebber87