Fibro Friends' Support Group Cont'.

» lmswan20 - This is my first post

Hi may I join in?
I wrote this post two weeks ago on, Millions of Women dying to be heard. Every one there must be on vacation.
My husband was turned down again, fond out yesterday. I have'nt lost it yet but I might, the more I think about it.
My neck, back, arms and legs have been hurting so badly for the past several days, I could hardly walk. I had to over take pain killers and keep on working.
I don't know what we are going to do, I don't know how much more I can take. I am going to write the president, maybe he will be able to help. I will try to keep the faith.
I come here all the time, I love these sights, they have been a blessing to me. I'm glad you all are here.
Mary Alice

Hello,
This is my first post so bare with me.
I must say I thought I had it bad, I really feel for you ashemp1, My heart goes out to you.
This is easier said than done but do try to keep the faith, that is what has kept me going for the past five years. What ever you do don't give up!
I can relate to all of you, and would also like to see the system change. My hat off to you for writing to the president.
My husband has not been able to work for the past five years, we have gone through two hearing and appeals, and are waiting on an answer now, he has a herneated disk, depression and COPD, he also passes out. He has been is several car accidents, all to gather he is not in good health
Neither am I, I have osteoarthritis, fibromyalgia, and spondyoloisthesis. There is some day's that I can hardly move much less walk. I will be forty four in October, I know I am much too young for all of this, at least this is what my boss’s tell me.
I am a house keeper for two Dr.’s, in a very, very, big house, I’ve been there for nine years. I have never felt totally comfortable there, never like family or friends. I strictly work there. I have to admit they have been good to me, they don't look over my shoulder, in fact I rarely see them at all. They put up with me hurting all the time, they just ignore me. How ever I don’t have to lift heavy thing’s, and now they take off the garbage for me. When I first started there I worked four full day’s a week, I did the house work, clothes, picked up the kid’s from school, than carried them to there different activities. Now all the kids are in collage, and I haven’t had to cook in a long wile. When I didn’t have to pick up the kids any more, my work got harder on me, my day’s got longer. My pain got worse, way before the day ended. I had to drop down to three full days a week. That still didn’t help. Not only was I in pain I was also very depressed.
It’s harder for me to stop and sit, than to keep going, so after a wile I would work six hours straight and would leave after six hours in to the day, I asked my boss if she was satisfied with the work I was doing, and told her I was only able to work about six hours a day. She said she didn’t have a problem with that, and she was totally satisfied with the job I was doing. They continued paying me for eight hours a day. Than one day she went on a trip, and her husband said she wanted to know what time I was leaving, I told him and also told him she said that was OK. She said she didn’t remember telling me that. I confronted her when she come back, she said they didn’t have a problem with how many hours I worked, but she would only pay me for the hours I work. It didn’t seem to matter that I didn’t take brakes, and I busted my but to do the best job I could do. It hurt my feelings but I guess I was wrong. I couldn’t afford a cut in pay, me being the only one working, I tried real hard to stay all day, I couldn’t, so I went down to two in a half days a week, and a cut in pay.
In January my husband and I was hit in the back by a big delivery truck wile sitting at red light, the truck was coming to a stop, thank God so it wasn’t a major impact. But is was enough that we got a hard jerk.
I felt what was like a electoral shock from my neck all the way down to the tale bone. I hurt from the very beginning. I had a full set of x-rays done of the spine, nothing was found that had to do with the accident.
I’ve been through two sets of therapy, I had a MRI done a few weeks ago I haven’t herd anything yet.
Because I couldn’t afford to loose any pay, I continued to work, regardless of the pain.
Now I’m having to work a few hours a day every day, so that I don’t loose any pay.
Having faith in God, and knowing that one day thing’s will be better is what keeps me going.
Knowing that were not really that bad off, there is people in much, much more bad shape.
I have almost gave in and lost it, quit a few times, and IM not going to say I wont loose it if something good doesn’t come out of this last hearing. I have a good feeling about this, we got the judge what he wanted, he said if we did he would grant it.
Please forgive me I didn’t mean for this to be so long, I will try not to let it happen again. I have been coming to this sight for a long wile now, it has been a true blessing. I come here more than any where on the net. I don’t think I am a good writer but practice makes perfect.
I like to write poems, and would one day like to write a song.
Please don’t throw me off of here,
Thanks for letting me vent.
Mary Alice

-- posted by lmswan20

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» Carol Wallace - Re: Leather pants, other fun stuff

In response to message posted by energynow:
I'll have to check out Simple Abundance. Although I can be really great at decluttering. Only not in my present car. That will scarcely hold a single garbage bag in the trunk and perhaps one in the front seat - scarcely worth the trip to the Goodwill. I can't believe that my new car, with seats that will actually support my back and a trunk worthy of a good declutterer, still isn't ready. It's been almost eight months!

Funny when you ask about a law that says you shouldn't wear certain things after a certain age. I tend to agree with you that if someone is 60 (or more) and has a great figure they should certainly wear suede or leather pants. And lots of other things that we seem to think older people shouldn't. But I have also seen women in clothing that simply seems wrong, whether it's because of their age, or their figure I can't reason out for myself. But I can recall making that kind of remakk - that so and so should never attempt a style like that at her age. The only example I can come up with right now is seeing one of "the girls" walking down my driveway in one of those baby doll dresses all pastel and ruffly - very Sweet Sixteen - with white stockings (which I always think of as a mistake) and long, Alice in Wonderland hair. At least 50 pounds overweight and in her 50s. It just looked like she was trying too hard to look 20 and failing miserably.

I have been wearing ankle length dresses and skirts for years and love them. It saved me a bundle in panty hose when I taught as I could just put on a pair of sheer knee highs and no one was any the wiser. And if I find a great cut - bias cut, those ragged handkerchief hemlines, etc - I feel quite stylish. Not "in style" - just stylish. In fact I found out that one reason I met so many people so quickly and got to some prominence at the garden writer's conference was that everyone remembered what they described as my "swirly skirts."

Heck - I'm 56 and my main rule for dressing is that it not only has to look good on me but must feel as good as walking around in my PJs. Roger was trying to talk me into buying jeans last week as he says I now have a great figure for them - but I stopped wearing them over 10 years ago because I decided they really weren't comfortable. But to please him I did find a pair of slacks at TJ Maxx that are stretch velvet but cut exactly like a pair of jeans. Except they have this cool zipper from outer hem to knee that can unzip so that they flap. We are both pleased - he more than I because he thought that zipper was the coolest thing he's seen.

Odd that you mention caprs, Jean because of all things we were talking about them at dinner last night. Only I nixed them because unless you have really fabulous legs they seem to cut most people off at the widest part of their calf and so make their legs look heavier than they should look. Or maybe it takes a tall person. At 5'2" they won't work for me - I have those short, stocky Middle-European legs that are a bit heavy even if I'm underweight. Another reason I love those long skirts!

By the way- Happy Birthday! Sorry I missed it by a day but I'm here now and hoping you had a great one.

-- posted by Carol Wallace

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» Carol Wallace - Re: This is my first post

In response to message posted by lmswan20:
Of course we're not going to throw you off here. Everyone is welcome - especially fellow fibromites.

I'm no longer working (I was a college professor) because the short term memory problem that comes with fibro made it impossible for me to lecture. But when I did, I was just like you, finding it far easier to keep on plugging than to stop and rest. I'd get home from school and barely stop to remove my coat before I started in on whatever needed dong at home. Mainly I knew that once I stopped I'd never get started again - so it was better not to stop.

Back pain is one of the gardest things to diagnose but I'm really surprised that you haven't had any news of your MRI results yet. Have you called the doctor? Sometimes these things kind of get lost in the shuffle. I remember having an MRI that showed abnormal brain activity - I knew about it because my doctor sent me a copy of the information he sent to my disability insurance company - but he never called me to report those results so I had to call him instead. Give it a try - it's better to find out what they said - even if it's bad news, than sitting around wondering. And once you have some kind of diagnosis you can get started on trying to fix it.

I can sympathize about the spondylosthesis. I have two in my lower back that are also making it hard for me to walk. Both are pressing on nerve root endings which causes extra pain. But since I just spent a good year trying to recover from having my cervical spine area essentially rebuilt the doctor doesn't want to put me through a second surgery yet. He wants to try more therapy except I used up all my insurance coverage working on the neck area. That was four sets of therapy. It helped, if I'm honest with myself - but of course when we go through these thngs we tend to want miracles and total cures. They aren't always forthcoming.

You just have to learn to accept any improvements that you experience and be gratefu for those. Living with chronic pain and illness requires a special sort of mindset if we're going to live a liofe that has any sort of quality. Looking for the bright spots. Concentrating on what you can still do instead of hwat you can't do anymore.

I know I've lost the ability to do most of the things that I loved most. But I know I can't give up and settle into depression because then all I'd be doing is making myself and my husband miserable. So instead I look hard for things that I can still accomplish - or new ways of doing old things that allow me to still enjoy at least part of them. And I look for new things that I can do that maybe my old, busy life didn't leave me time to explore.

Writing is good, and as you say, practice makes perfect. Try keeping a journal. You'll discover that it's good therapy as well as good practice. And you may also find it valuable when it comes to your health care, if you make note of what hurts when - and if any specific activity or even food triggers more pain. I've found that I need to be very specific there. It's not enough to say that too much writing makes my arm hurt - I have to say specifically what part of my arm. That makes a difference. And it's mind boggling how much of our pain in arms, legs, etc. are a result of spinal problems.

Given your history and what you've told us here, I'd really give serious thought to seeing a neurologist if you haven't already.

-- posted by Carol Wallace

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» Tery01 - Simple Abundance

In response to message posted by CarolWallace:

Hey Carol - Simple Abunance is not just about decluttering our homes, but it is about decluttering our lives! This book has changed my life completely.

It helps to get in touch with your true inner self and whatever is in your life holding you back, I guarantee after reading this book that you will "nip any baggage you may have out of your life for good."

It is dirt cheap now in Barnes and Noble and it is a must have

-- posted by Tery01

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» energynow - Welcome, Mary Alice

In response to message posted by lmswan20:

Nice to have you on board.I write poetry and have turned some into songs. So we already have made a discovery--we have something in common other than
FM!Glad we've been a blessing. I've been in despair many times, but God hasn't lost me yet.

Remember there are a lot of people who care!

I'll be back posting later. Sometimes I joke around, sometimes I'm depressed. I'm just trying to learn to accept myself and my limitations.

Take care.

Jean, Tennessee

-- posted by energynow

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» zhann - Re: This is my first post

In response to message posted by lmswan20:

Welcome Mary Alice, glad t have you here. We all vent at times. Right now, I am itching, depresse and very tired. Just cn't seem to get moving or anyhing one.

God luck n he disbility hearing.

Carol, Teri and Jean, Hi to you. Still can't get into the oherdiscussin thread. Glad to have aplace to vent.

Joyce in East TN.

-- posted by zhann

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» Tery01 - Re: This is my first post

In response to message posted by lmswan20:

Welcome Mary Alice. I could so relate to what you are going through and feeling. So, you write poetry and want to write songs, that is so cool!!

You are a good writer, I could tell in your post

Take care of yourself.

Hi Joyce, Carol, Jean and everyone else

-- posted by Tery01

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» energynow - Perspective

In response to message posted by zhann:

I've lost perspective over the yrs. between illnesses and the way we've been treated in business situations. I've been depressed over my perceived loses. But I need to look at the good things in my life. Yes, life can be tough. Yes, there are evil people in the world. But God still loves me and has a purpose for my life.

Jean

-- posted by energynow

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» energynow - 2nd hello of day

Checking in. Doing o.k. Managed to get several things accomplished today, thank God. Would ya'
believe, though, that pile of ironing still sits there. Will be gone for appts. tomorrow, so don't know whether I'll be around for check- in or not.

Jean

-- posted by energynow

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» zhann - Re: 2nd hello of day

In response to message posted by energynow:

Jean, ironing what's that. Just kidding.

I have slept and slept. Hi Teri and Carol and all.

Be back later. Joyce

-- posted by zhann

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