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Helping Anorexics
This archived discussion is "read only". « Previous 1 2 3 Next » » jimkirk - Helping Anorexics To worriedmom:Don't blame yourself. It can take years for anorexia to surface; very often it starts with innocent dieting. I know you're going through a traumatic experience, but you're on the right track. Your daughter's admissions are a good sign. Keep the doctor's appointment, and try to get her to go. Say you're just getting a consultation and want some info from the doctor, and that you need her help. If she won't go, see the doctor anyway. You can get more info, and see if this is the type of person that can help her. Keep the lines of communication with your daughter open. If her situation is not life threatening, be supportive but don't push her. Just say you'll be there for her if she needs your help. If she wants to talk, let her come to you. Meanwhile, stay off the subject of food and weight as much as possible. That's what therapists are for. If her situation becomes life threatening, you may have to take drastic measures, such as going to court to have her committed to a treatment center, but this is an absolute last resort. I suspect that you've discovered this thing relatively early, and hope that it won't come to that. Read up on the subject as much as you can. Start with my articles, join a support group for parents, read books. You may have to see several doctors before you find one that you and your daughter can agree on. Check out the discussion forums of CaringOnline. The link is listed on my topic page, and they have plenty of folks posting who are going through the same experience. Stay calm. You are not alone, and you sound like you're doing well. Good luck. -- posted by jimkirk » BuiltStrong - Lost.... I have known that my cousin of 19 has been anorexic for 2 years. When she first came out and notified me of her condition I was poised to say something to her mother. But at that time my family had just gone through the death of my uncle. She told me not to say anything, that she would deal with the situation on her own. So I never uttered a word. Just recently the doctor called her mother and requested that my cousin be hospitalized immediately. The anorexia has been eating away at her muscle. I am the only one who knows that this has been like this for 2 years. People now come to me for answers. And now that she is in the hospital I feel as if it was my fault. I cant seem to get away from the torment of guilt. I know little about this illness, except that it might take away one of my loved ones. I guess I am just looking for answers on what I should do. I feel lost in my own morbid thoughts.I need to know in what direction to go...Thanks -- posted by BuiltStrong » egbok - Your relapse It is extremely difficult to allow yourself to take care of yourself when someone you love is experiencing the tortue of chemotherapy and radation. The person you are reaching out to, is so depleted that they often can not reach back. You must try and find in your own mind and soul what you can really accomplish in terms of being helpful to them and work toward that end. The helplessness of not being able to save them or make things better for them is really hard to cope. Don't feel that suffering with them is the answer. Turn your engeries into doing small things that you feel will let them know you are on their side, only if it is covering them up when they are resting, adjusting their pillows, opening the drapes to bring in sunshine. Try to pull up memmories of warm times you had with your mom and discuss them with her, even if she is sleeping. Write her notes even if you never give them to her. In other notes or diaries you can express your feelings and fears in the notes so you can see them yourself, get them in the open so you can deal with them. Tears will probably flow when you do this and you will find it is an enormus relief to be able to get them out in a place where your mom won't see your discomfort and be harmed by it.It is a very tough time, I am holding very positive thoughts for you. Janna -- posted by egbok » jimkirk - New Posting Policy To Everyone:Please be advised that there is a new policy for posting messages on this topic page. Please read same at http://www.suite101.com/topic_page.cfm/4... before posting. Thank you. -- posted by jimkirk » helper74 - Re: please advise In response to message posted by enigma16:dear enigma, the best thing to do is tell an adult, probably someone from the school like a teacher or a principal ,even if she will hate you afterwards . because if you dont tell youll be hurting her even more, if u have any ?s feel free to ask -- posted by helper74 » Amanda1119 - Can u read this and help me please!! Just a few questions... Maybe someone who has battled this or is can help me..please. I am a 22 year old girl who lost about 45lbs last year by starving myself i will admit that all i ate for about 3 months was jello and water i have gained 10lbs from my lowest weight back..now i feel awful i feel so guilty and am constantly stressed about eating. I don't eat breakfast or lunch just dinner which usually contains allot of fatty foods. I know this is unhealthy but is it anorexia again? I have been told by my best friend that i am anorexic i still find this hard to belive, i am not as strict on myself as before and i do eat fatty foods now. Just because i eat them at one time of the day does this mean i have an eating disorder i feel I'm just unhealthy. I have been taking diet pills for over a year now. And i actually saw a picture of me from when i was 10 lbs lighter which makes me not want to go out anymore..since i am fatter now. I just think this is normal i have been like this for awhile now and it has gotten better before I'd cry when i saw food now I'm ok. I think ..please help me.. Thank you.. Amanda-- posted by Amanda1119 » workerbee7 - Re: Can u read this and help me please!! Just a few questions.. In response to message posted by Amanda1119:Dear Amanda, -- posted by workerbee7 » Pearl56 - Re: Can u read this and help me please!! Just a few questions.. In response to message posted by Amanda1119:Dear Amanda, I totally understand how you're feeling. I was diagnosed with anorexia last year and have been been trying to recover ever since. I have been coping with it for three years now and its just one day at a time. Today is the first time I've ever searched for web pages to help and im so glad to find someone else who knows how i feel. I lost over 70 pounds and dropped from a size 16 to an 8 but became very sick. -- posted by Pearl56 » tori35 - Re: Hope I'm doing the right thing In response to message posted by worriedMom:Worriedmomm, I am in your situation. My daughter is 14 and also a dancer. I feel so guilty that I did not see what happening. She has been going to counseling for a few months. It IS more challenging when they do not accept that they have a problem, but NOT impossible!! Get her into counseling fast. daughter resists going every time, but she will talk to the counselor once she gets there. We do see baby steps of improvement. Praying does help too!! Let me know how things are going!! -- posted by tori35 « Previous 1 2 3 Next » Please follow the guidelines set forth in the Suite101 Posting Etiquette when adding to the discussion. |
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Can we talk? Love, Sara