Pet Abuse, Women, and Domestic Violence

» RevNancyLeigh - Very True

When I was a teen, I had a boyfriend who was emotionally abusive, and rarely (but sometimes) physically abusive as well. He once told me that if I tried to leave him he would tie me to a chair and make me watch him kill my beloved cat.

The cat is 17 now and was never harmed, and the guy is long gone...but I did indeed stay with him a little longer than I would have if I didn't always hear that threat in the back of my mind. When he realized that his physical threats against me weren't working to get me to do what he wanted, he turned towards threats that were far more manipulaing...

I hope others take this as a serious issue, because it is indeed real...all too real in fact.

Blessings,

-- posted by RevNancyLeigh

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» Ann_Downing - Pet Abuse, Women, and Domestic Violence

Nancy -

Thank you for sharing your story. I was amazed at how common a problem this is. If you consider all the incidents that go unreported, it is too many. I hope this helps victims to identify how serious a situation this is and get themselves and their pets removed from it as soon as possible. I know that sometimes this is easier said than done.

- Ann (ED)

-- posted by Ann_Downing

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» almostasurvivor - If I could do it over...

I grew up sexually abused in an alcoholic family. I was normal to everyone else. But I felt alone, with only my animals for friends.. my babies. They suffered with me through my depressions and they kept me alive with their love. I owed them more than I gave, far more, though I loved them beyond loving myself. When the depression and fear became overwhelming and I could trust no one, my world fell apart and the animals, my babies, were taken forcibly from my whirlpool of pain by the SPCA...using lies and deceit of their own as tactics supported by law.

They said I abused them.. but I hung on too long, long after I could no longer support them, thinking in my own mind.. one more day, if I can just fix this current problem.. whatever it was. Finally, my self esteem and my life, collapsed.

I'm branded as an abuser now.

It was not ignorance, it was fear, self-pity, loneliness, and dependency that kept me from making the decision to place them in safe homes before the decision was made for me.

I'm not ignorant, not abusive. I was in pain, and after the SPCA "raid" I was suicidal for years. No one knew... I hid that as well.. caring for my children so they wouldn't end up back with their father.

It's a lousy, vicious cycle, this abuse thing.

The next time you hear about animal abuse, think carefully before you jump to conclusions. No one will ever love my animals more than I. Never. But love is not enough.

My family loved me... but I grew up without self-esteem.

Remember that the next time you insult your child or spouse for not living up to expectations. A lack of self-esteem destroys lives, often years down the road.

-- posted by almostasurvivor

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