Fathers Are Parents, Too

Posted by Barbara Gibson Apr 26, 2007

Fathers are parents, too. When we think about the daily activities of parenting – carpooling, preparing meals, bathing, laundry and PTA – we typically imagine mom carrying out these tasks. Increasingly though, dad is stepping up to the plate. When it comes time to roll up the sleeves and tackle the hands on work of parenting many of today’s dads would rather get in on the active parenting game than sit on the sidelines.

As men step into more active parenting roles many are re-examining some of their most closely held values around masculinity and manhood. Tough makes room for tender, and relationship building is no longer only about prospects or clients but also about the children in their lives.

Each age and stage of a child’s life presents a different challenge, but most parents regard the teen years as the toughest. As teens move toward independence, the relationship dynamics shift and dad-kid interactions often feel awkward and unwieldy. Dad may begin to find that it is more helpful to be vulnerable than the voice of experience; to listen instead of fix; to take a back seat when he really wants to take charge.

If you are looking for some really good perspective from a dad who has navigated these choppy waters, look to Hugh O’Neill. O’Neill, father to now adult children, writes with the unmistakable clarity of hindsight and self-reflection, about some of the things dads need to know when relating to their teens.

O’Neill’s article, Speaking in Teen: 8 Simple Rules for Communicating Better With Your Kids, is written for dads, but can be useful for moms as well. Read it and let me know what you think.