Sandra Williams's Blog
Posted by Sandra Williams
There are many different reasons for holiday stress. If Christmas wasn't pleasant when you were a child, it can trigger terrible memories. On the other hand if it was fantastic, it can create pressure to recreate that.
If one of your parents died, the holiday season is often when you miss them the most. That's what I have the hardest time with anyway. It's been ten years but I don't miss my dad any less.
There are more outings, more shopping and more money is usually spent. Sometimes it's hard to know how to spread your time and money out, especially if you have a large family.
We have simplified things over the years and cut down on our activities. We always welcome people into our home during the holidays. I start to notice how the living room needs a fresh coat of paint and I bake like a mad woman.
Whether you celebrate or not, I wish you joy and peace this holiday season. I hope you spend it with people you care about and let them know how you feel.
Right now I'm reading Kicking Your Stress Habits by Donald A. Tubesing, Ph.D. I'll share more about it when I'm finished but here are a couple other articles about books related to stress that might be helpful.
Posted by Sandra Williams
It's hard to break bad habits but choosing healthier foods will not only help prevent heart attacks. They will also improve your mental health.
Snacks have been the biggest challenge here. I find it easier if I have a healthy snack stash to turn to when someone brings home potato chips. Salsa is low in fat and good with just about anything, so I use that instead of cream based dips.
Other quick healthy snacks include dried fruit, nuts and trail mixes. I'm also loaded up with low fat popcorn, fresh fruit and vegetables and whole grain crackers. The crackers aren't bad with salsa either.
If you're trying to wean yourself off caffeine, try replacing a cup of coffee or tea with fruit juice or herbal tea. It's amazing how much better you'll feel from this one small change.
For more on how food affects mood see Healthy Foods for Mental Health.
Posted by Sandra Williams
Dale Carnegie was famous for his books and courses on self-improvement such as “How to Win Friends and Influence People”.
Public Speaking was first published in 1913 but there have been many revisions since. My particular copy is the third revised addition from 1955.
His speech plan is written in three different ways but basically follows the same formula. This is how I’ve interpreted it.
- Find a problem and explain the facts about it in an interesting way.
- Win their confidence and/or share a convincing solution.
- Help make people feel part of the solution so that they will want to act.
To gain confidence his advice is the old fake it till you make it, which works. When you’re scared, if you act as though you are not and face those fears, you will eventually stop feeling scared. Of course this takes practice and preparation and those are things that are highly emphasized.
- It does help if you feel passionate about your subject and are extremely knowledgeable about it. In grade school I remember coming in second for my speech about my own family. My family was obviously something I was familiar with so I could speak about it confidently. If there’s a subject you’re passionate about but not as knowledgeable, you can research it to gain confidence.
Dale Carnegie shares great strategies on improving your memory and how to interest your audience. Other chapters include how to open and close a talk, making your meaning clear and how to get action. Public Speaking and Influencing Men In Business, 1913-2007, Kessinger Publishing, ISBN - 10:0766169731, is still relevant today. If you’re interested in developing more effective speeches, it's an excellent learning tool.
Posted by Sandra Williams
I have the 8th addition of Dr.Spock's Baby and Child Care book. It's been revised and updated by Dr. Robert Needleman to include new information. It still maintains the firm but loving advice many have grown to trust from Dr. Benjamin Spock.
My children aren't babies anymore but the book was an enormous help to me when they were. Some of the stuff seems like common sense but it was a relief to find a doctor who agreed with my methods.
There's still valuable information for school age children and teenagers. There's also a detailed section on first aid and what to do in an emergency.
As an example he encourages giving out small portions of food so that there isn't pressure to eat a huge pile of food. Also he reassured me that it was o.k. to feed your child when hungry instead of sticking to a strict schedule.
My mom's more a fan of strict schedules but I have always been a bit of rebel. She worked in pediatrics for years though so I do respect much of her advice. Strict schedules do make more sense if you have twenty babies to care for at the same time.
Dr. Spock Company's website is a fantastic resource for info and advice for infants, toddlers, school age children, nutrition, medical information, books and more.
Posted by Sandra Williams
For every copy of Run with the Bulls sold on Amazon, Dr. Tim Irwin is going to donate a copy to a wounded warrior in a US military hospital. If you do buy a copy, make sure you forward your receipt to info@runwiththebulls.net
Dr. Irwin is a licensed psychologist and popular speaker on leadership development and organizational effectiveness for many well known companies such as Fortune 500. His book is based upon thousands of interviews with successful leaders and individuals.
- For more information and free resources see the Run With The Bulls Review.
Posted by Sandra Williams
Elaine St. James used to be a busy real estate investor but the long hours were stressing her out.
She points out simplifying doesn't have to mean a sudden move to a cabin in the woods. It's often an ongoing process to scale down and simplify your life according to your own desires.
To achieve a simpler slower paced life, she advises us to cut back on things that are not essential or complicating our lives.
Some of the ideas I liked:
- Do less housekeeping & laundry
- Watch less television
- Let go of stuff you don't need (declutter)
- Change jobs or cut down hours if possible
She does have good suggestions in Living the Simple Life (ISBN: 078686219X) for simplifying the lives of your children as well. I do think many children are overbooked with structured activities.
Although I have never been a social butterfly, some of her suggestions seem severely anti-social. She does mention how lifestyle changes and priorities are unique to each individual.
I am not a huge fan of the telephone for instance but I would have a hard time giving it up. Family gatherings are important to me as well and not a time waster. One of her time saver suggestions was to refuse all invitations. To be fair she does say to just try it for thirty days, but I guess I'm too close to my family for that.
We both agree that there are too many things that complicate people's lives. Contemplating whether you really need something before you buy it makes sense. It's not always a matter of whether you can afford something or not. It's deciding whether it will simplify your life or complicate it.
Posted by Sandra Williams
Stress management and relaxation techniques are important to practice for peace of mind. It helps people stay focused and succeed without turning to substances.
I read a lot of that sort of stuff since I used to overindulge in too many things.
Some of my favorite authors include Wayne Dyer, Stephen Covey, David D. Burns and Scott Peck.
I think I have read almost every book Dr. Wayne Dyer wrote and all of them were helpful. He is such a brilliant, funny, down to earth and inspiring person that it can't help but rub off on you.
Dr. Benjamin Spock’s Baby and Child Care is one of my favorite parenting books. It has sold over 50 million copies so many other parents must like it too.
If you have any authors or book suggestions that focus on improving relationships, parenting or self-improvement, please let me know. I have read plenty of them but I am open to learning more from others.
Posted by Sandra Williams
The North American International Auto Show in Detroit shows us how automakers are using technology to create cars that are both faster and environmentally friendlier.
I don’t think of sports cars as being green but many of these vehicles are improving on fuel economy, are lighter and still have high horse power.
Two examples include:
- The Corvette ZR-1, which is built entirely of lightweight material, aluminum, magnesium, and carbon fiber. It has one of the best fuel economies in its class.
- The Cadillac CTS V, which has 550 horsepower and 550 pound feet of torque.
Posted by Sandra Williams
Earth Vision went live in January 2007 and focuses on spiritual ecology, which is described as interweaving both nature and soul. There are also several articles addressing various environmental issues with a new one being featured every season or four months. Also offered are five online books with excerpts to read for free.
Why Bees are Dying
I found the report from Josef Graf particularly interesting on Why Bees are Dying. Our interference is one of the main reasons. The fact that we are creating bees that are more docile makes it convenient for humans but the bees are not as apt to be aggressive when they should be against enemies either.
There are other ways man interferes with honeybees natural processes. You can find a list of them on the Earth Vision site. There are also links to more valuable information, including reports and articles on various subjects relating to environmentalism and/or spiritual ecology.