Parental Involvment Within the Treatment Process

Posted by Jeannie Delahunt Apr 12, 2009

I know when I was a substance abuse counselor, having the family involved with the treatment aspects of the identified client was such a help for the client.

Sometimes, the client didn't know, see or understand how much the family cared until everyone was in treatment. So many times parents felt so trapped, that they didn't know they had any influence until they became involved in treatment.

Fact, is parent(s), you have lots of power and lots of clout! The evidence of this may not show immediately, but for most families, the impact will show in time.

First, family therapy helps to sort out the family dynamics. Once those are sorted out, parents are shown how to do things differently, which, can help them become empowered rather than victimized by whatever the issue happens to be.

For instance for those parents who have a teenager using drugs, alcohol, you're in for a rough, rocky road. But, knowing how alcohol and drugs impact a teenager, with the help of therapeutic counseling and Al-anon, you can develop coping skills that not only help your teen, but helps you to keep your sanity. The same holds true for eating disorders, and, I suspect, any other issue that makes family life feel as though a tornado is constantly swirling within the family unit.

Secondly, don't give up hope. Kids, even if they don't look like they're listening, even if they are thrusting all of their anger upon you, it may look hopeless, but it isn't. Kids are listening. Kids will feel your love and your sense of hope. They may not recognize it at the time, but when moments of serenity and clarity prevail upon them they will feel the dedication, love and loyalty. You are the calm in their storm. You are the rock they need for a foundation.

And as some of you already know, they can test you to your limits. They can push buttons you never knew existed! Love them through it, for however long it takes, and it may take a very long time. Be prepared for the long haul.

Again, counseling can help you determine where to put the boundaries. For instance, as in alcohol and drug abuse, you don't want to be bailing them out of the circumstances, even though you want to show them you care and are ready to help them. Bailing out, means, they never feel the severity of the consequence. If they don't feel the severity, what reason do they have to change?

Even for situations that look hopeless, continue to care, continue to show love - you just never know where, when or how a change or changes will happen. But, get help for yourselves as well. Make sure that you are rested and are healthy. Make sure you are eating and exercising.

And for those of you who believe in the power of prayer, pray. Prayer not only helps you, but has been known to help the child. Believe it or not, when children see a parent reach out to a higher power, it humbles them, though they may not readily admit it. They learn humility by the influence of a praying parent. They learn to reach out for answers. They learn it is OK to say, "I don't know, and I am trying to find out."

Yup, it ain't easy! But who ever said parenting was? I personally think being a parent is the hardest and yet the most rewarding/awesome responsibility, role, job, that anyone could shoulder. Give yourselves a pat on the back! Applaud your efforts! Be kind to yourselves and reward yourselves now and again. You deserve it!

Happy Easter for all who celebrate this holiday, for those of you who do not - many blessings upon yourselves and your families! :).