Jeannie Delahunt's Blog
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
The following information may be so disturbing, you won't sleep after you read it, but then, maybe that's a good thing, if you end up motivated enough to do something to end the holocaust.
I had to digress from my normal subject matter. Recently, a friend sent me an e-mail that has stolen sleep from me for days on end. Tonight is no different. It is almost 2 a.m. EST. I can't sleep. Images of the misery I have read about invade my serenity. I wanted to write an article about it, but I find the material so upsetting, I can't write logically. My blog is the best I can do at the moment.
There are two forthcoming links. Dear reader, you can read about this horrific practice in China. But, I have to warn you, if you are a lover of animals and creatures in general, you will be sick. If you have a heart, you will be sick. Sir Paul McCartney has refused to perform in China to protest the egregious savagery. Thank you Sir Paul! Thank you for having the internal strength to speak out and stand up - tall! Thank you for being a role model for other entertainers to follow.
Now, if countless others will take a stand, we can end this unbelievably cruel practice. How cruel? Read the links and find out. I am reluctant to state openly, if there are young people reading this. If you are a young person/teenager, please let your parents read the links, first, for your own safety.
I am appalled that there are no laws in China to protect these defenseless creatures. I am appalled that a supposedly civilized nation was allowed to host the 2008 Olympics given this information. For shame China! As for myself, I will never set foot in your country! None of my dollars that I have personal control over will ever be invested in your nation. The extent of your cruelty and lack of conscience on behalf of defenseless creatures is beyond disgusting! And, you deny it to boot!
Please, anyone reading this from the U.S. or Europe, DO NOT BUY FUR PRODUCTS, unless you know for a secure fact that the fur is fake. Items can be intentionally mislabeled. Please urge friends and family not to buy fur products. China is the world's largest producer of furs, and the U.S. and Europe are the largest consumers of fur products, fur products are used not only to make clothing but as enhancements, trims, etc.
It is time to stop the misery. It is time to take a stand and boycott fur products. Again, please send e-mails to friends and family members urging them not to buy fur products. Ask them to pass the information on. Please, if you see fur products in stores communicate with the store managers about the misery creatures endure. Ask the store managers to make a commitment not to purchase clothing or any other article that is made of or trimmed with fur from China.
For those of you who are long time standing clients of your local veterinarian's offices, please talk to them about the Chinese Fur Market. Perhaps they would allow fliers to inform and distribute. I have already written a letter off to Maine Senator Snowe calling for strict sanctions and laws about incoming fur products from China. I will continue writing letters to the remaining federal representatives of Maine and then start writing letters to the Editor (local papers). PETA also has materials available (see link below).
The creatures of the earth may some day be able to thank us. Right now, they can do nothing but suffer. Who will be their voices?
It is time to boycott any commodity J.Lo has created as well as this website, Etsy.com, which sells fur products. J. Lo is a lover of fur and despite PETA's efforts to admonish her to stop using and displaying furs, furs this superstar knows full well come from China's fur market, she continues her arrogance. Do you cherish the skin you're in, J. Lo?
"A righteous man has regard for the life of his animal, but even the compassion of the wicked is cruel."
Given this economy, who knows, perhaps those who take a stand will receive a blessing or many blessings! Given the plight of the U.S. economy, blessings would be most welcome!
On behalf of the animals who have and are suffering, thank you for reading and helping! Blessings be bestowed upon you!
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Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
Contact: Shannon Cutts
Phone: 713-906-9888
Email: mc@key-to-life.com
MentorCONNECT
www.key-to-life.com
Attention: Feature and Event Desks
Jessica Setnick, MS, RD/LD, CSSD, presents a FREE eating disorders teleconference on “Surviving and Thriving During the Holidays” for MentorCONNECT
[October 16, 2009] – Internationally-recognized dietician Jessica Setnick, MS, RD/LD, CSSD, will present a FREE teleconference on Wednesday, November 4th, 2009, at 8pm central time. All are welcome to attend. RSVP’s are required.
This event is sponsored by MentorCONNECT, the first global eating disorders mentoring organization. Based in Houston since its inception in September 2007, MentorCONNECT now has a presence in 32 USA states and 10 countries, and has sponsored free events featuring such notable authors and speakers as Thom Rutledge, Jenni Schaefer, Dr. Carolyn Becker, Doris Smeltzer, and others.
Event Details:
To Register: Send an email with “RSVP for Jessica” to mc@key-to-life.com
RSVP Deadline: November 4th at noon
For More Info: Contact MentorCONNECT at 713-906-9888 or mc@key-to-life.com
View Event Flyer: You may also view the event flyer online at www.key-to-life.com
http://www.key-to-life.com/storage/mentorconnect/JessicaSetnick.11.09.pdf
More About MentorCONNECT:
MentorCONNECT is the first global online eating disorders mentoring community. Membership and all services are always free to members, and certain events are also opened up to the larger community. In addition to offering one-on-one mentoring matches, membership includes access to a password-protected, moderated, PRO-recovery community forum with two live weekly e-support groups and one Houston-based book study support group, periodic retreats and special events, a wide variety of online themed support groups, recovery blogs, personalized profile pages, the ability to upload photos/video/songs/artwork, and moderated chat/email services. To volunteer your services as a caring mentor, be matched with a mentor, or find general support, visit us at www.key-to-life.com/mentorconnect.
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
Filippa Hamilton was fired as a model for Ralph Lauren, evidently for alleged weight gain. Yet, an advertisement picture shows comely Hamilton with ridiculously reduced curves, appearing almost anorexic.
According to the article, Lauren says the picture was a mistake, released by accident. Let's backup one step. How could the picture be a supposed mistake, when someone obviously put considerable time and thought into creating it? Obviously there was a motive behind it. C'mon, Mr. Lauren, how about stepping up to the plate and taking some responsibility. You might earn some character/integrity points!
Hmmm, research is showing that young girls and women, and a growing body of men, in general, severely feel pressured to look and be perfect. So much so that disordered eating now has a place in the DSM-IV as a viable diagnosis.
Why can't women be accepted for who they are? How come super fashion icons, like Ralph Lauren can't get the message? How is it they obviously ignore the growing epidemic of disordered eating - disordered eating which can, if not treated, become fatal?
Personally, I applaud Filippa for speaking out and standing up for realistic ideals. And Ralph Lauren, if I could fit into one of your designs, I wouldn't purchase it (even if I could afford it) out of principle! And that goes for any other fashion or makeup icon who abuses, and I consider it a form of abuse, against the female physique. Fortunately, the British government is seeking to do something about this kind of hype. Thumbs up Brits! Well, America? What are you doing?
Thank you Ms. Hamilton for your inner strength and character. I hope any young person reading my blog or who has read what has happened to you may be able to feel empowered knowing that there is deceit portrayed in pictures. Not only are you a fashion model but a strong role model with enough courage to speak out against the abuse.
"I think they [Ralph Lauren] owe American women an apology, a big apology," says Hamilton. "I'm very proud of what I look like, and I think a role model should look healthy."
Filippa, I couldn't agree with you more!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
Because there is a word limit to the articles, I was not, sadly, able to mention numerous other samplings for the work portrayed within Andrea's two books, nor was there room enough to detail the wonderful CD that accompanies Volume II (more on that in future articles).
Thus, to make up for the loss, I did want to emphasize that there are numerous examples of both eating disorder misery and recovery captured within Andrea's two volumes. I think anyone, even those who are not suffering from eating disorders could pick up the books and find some theme he/she could identify with.
The reading is not hard, but due to the intense level of emotional impact, a good deal of reflection, at least for me was necessary. This was especially true with the poetry and artwork, at least for me. What pictures say words can be completely useless for.
I found some of the pictures disturbing. Disturbing in that (at least for the US culture and society), punishing torment is prevelant, because of the emphasis upon the perfection of the human body in order to obtain and maintain success - though that is a lie, lies can be believed and perpetrated until they become a reality. Once a reality, who can separate the lie from the truth?
Will people lose or not be hired for jobs because they are not physically perfect? Of course that is the most extreme end, but, I personally think the US, at least, is heading that way. TV and the movies and music celebrities emphasize beauty and sexuality for fulfillment and success. Perhaps, however, this is fuel for its own article. Back to Andrea's books.
I find it comforting to know that despite the tyranny of an eating disorder, there is hope, and recovery is most definitely available to the sufferers who wish to pursue it. Recovery from eating disorders, like recovery from substance and alcohol abuse does not come easily. There is work involved, and sometimes scary work as issues, sometimes painful issues are addressed and processed.
As a former substance abuse counselor who loved to collect books about any issue relative to substance abuse, if I were still doing counseling, both of Andrea's books would be in my library. I would use them not only to educate myself, but as therapeutic tools for my clients. These are excellent resources.
Before I sign off, I also wanted to applaud Moritz, Andrea's kitty. This wonderful creature helped Andrea sustain her strength when strength waned. Blessed be the creatures!
Blessings to all! Thank you for reading!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
I chose to interview Andrea before reviewing her books, because, I thought it best for readers to hear that no one has to suffer the punishment an eating disorder chains the sufferer to - absolutely no one!
Andrea, herself, is a living, breathing example of recovery reality. I hope the readers of the series of interviews can not only hear Andrea's eating disorder voice, but can see how she faced the reality of her condition and turned it around. Consequently, Andrea is now free from the slave master and passionately seeks to help others recover or at the very least entertain and make the steps, even if they are baby steps, closer to recovery and freedom.
She also knows what it feels like to be isolated and forced into secrecy. Disordered eating, like a fungus, grows in the dark until sunlight is shed upon it. Since the fungus can't grow or flourish where there is no darkness, it dies. Healing comes in its stead - flowers reaching towards and kissing the sunlight.
It is most unfortunate that some cultures place success and beauty exclusively upon the physical aspects of the human body, both female and male. Thus, people feel pressured to de-evaluate themselves and only measure themselves by physical characteristics. There is so much more to humanity! So much more to life and living!
The answer? I believe, it is time to fight back. When ads bombard us with sexy, gorgeous models, it is time to write letters to the companies that promote unattainable, unrealistic physical images of men and women and let them know the damage these ads do to the well-being of people, especially the teenagers who are most vulnerable and at risk.
People come in all shapes and sizes. It is high time cultures accept that and move on. Since I live in the US, where glossy ads of beautiful people are in almost any magazine sold at the supermarket, I have to pick on my home country. Personally, I think if companies that run ridiculous ad campaigns were in reality, their sales potential would sore.
For myself, I don't even bother looking at ads of women or men who are gorgeous, because they look fake, phony and false to me, and I know full well the glitz and tricks used to sell a product or an ideal.
When will we say enough, and let it be known that enough is enough, perhaps, disordered eating suffering will become a diagnosis of the past.
If you are a teenager, and you are not eating or eating and purging, participating in excessive exercising, don't let those conditions continue. See your school nurse. Talk to your parents, if you think your parents will understand. If they do not understand or minimize what you are telling them, locate the eating disorder treatment facilities in your city/state/province, etc. Don't let the condition drag on. It is hurting you emotionally, psychologically and physically. Help is available!
Thanks, I needed to say that. Thanks for reading! Oh, and stay tuned. Besides the book reviews, an interview with the producer (Shannon Cutts) of the free CD that accompanies Andrea's book will be appearing. Shannon is a disordered eating recoverer as well. And heads up? The book and the CD are excellent! However, due to some traumatic issues which the book focuses upon, caution is necessary for any trauma survivor - best to read while under the help of a trained, trauma and/or eating disorder therapist, especially, if the trauma has not been previously addressed.
Below are the interviews with Andrea.
Blessings!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
Though the years change, peer pressures do not, though the methods may be different. The growing years are filled with awkward times, odd emotions and surging hormones.
My parents used to say, "You are in school to learn. That is your number one priority." Make it yours. Do the best you can. If you need help in your subjects, get it. See your teachers after class, or ask for an appointment to see them. If you are shy, ask for your parents' assistance. Don't let your studies get ahead or away from you. Your future is now!
Job markets are tough. And to get into a position, there is not so much flexibility anymore has been my experience. Employers don't want to take the time to train. If college, or some sort of after high school education is what you are seeking, you've got to do well in your studies and your college boards. That means hitting the books.
Yes, school also means socializing and having fun. Leave time for that too, but in the end there are choices. Make those choices healthy ones.
Please, do not experiment with drugs and alcohol. So many young lives I have witnessed get severely side-tracked from their goals when they take this route. Some never get back on track. Drugs and alcohol are not healthy choices. They won't help you to study or help you to learn solid social skills.
And, if your parents are using, don't let their sickness get to you. Find support in your community, in your school. You can do it. Remember, they are drug or alcohol affected. They see the world and you through the eyes of the chemical(s) or the alcohol they are using. They are not in reality.
And, no matter what size or shape you are, love yourself. Being successful is far more than outward beauty. Be someone who people can trust and respect. Don't listen or cave into the bullies. When someone is at the bully level, trust me, they have internal problems that they are projecting onto others. Don't cave into negative messages, whether they are coming from the outside or from within yourself.
I firmly believe we are all gifted. Find your gifts! Make them strong. Identify your weaknesses and work to make those strong as well. Don't take on too much at a time. Find friends who are positive not negative, friends who have solid morals and beliefs. Dare to dream! Dare to pursue your dreams!
Think about getting involved in your community. Volunteer. Help a neighbor. You might be able to ask them for a reference further down the road.
Good luck! I wish the best for you! Have a great school year!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
I am seeing an alarming number of searches regarding bulimic vomiting. Though I can't share these with you, dear reader, please know that as Suite writers we see the subject matter for searches. No, we don't see who is searching what (there's no identity), we just see the what. It is a tool that is given to us to improve our articles.
Again, I am alarmed at the number of searches I see regarding bulimic vomiting. I don't know if this is because the seekers are vomiting regularly and experiencing side-effects, or, if the searches are just out of interest in the subject, or, if someone is seriously considering this mechanism to maintain or lose weight.
Regardless, vomiting to cope with food and life is a MALADAPTIVE coping mechanism. It leads to extremely serious health issues, and can be fatal if ongoing.
The problems arise from the hydrochloric acid that the stomach contains in order to break down food. Hydrochloric acid dissolves tissue. It doesn't necessarily dissolve the stomach, because there is another mechanism involved that neutralizes the acid. However, stomach ulcers can occur.
If vomiting is regular enough, the acid will eat through whatever tissue it comes in contact with: the esophagus, tooth enamel, gums and everything in between.
Please, please, please dear reader, if you are doing this or are thinking about doing this, for your own well being, seek professional help! I can't emphasize this enough! I can't emphasize this enough! If you do not, you are only increasing your problems for the future.
Bulimia is treatable! Food/life issues are treatable! Get unshackled! There is help available! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!
Blessings!
P.S. If you have a recovery story, I would love to publish it! Your insights would help, support others. However, I do need a picture. If identity is a problem, we can discuss it and perhaps find a way.
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
I have a personal beef against insurance companies when it comes to paying for treatment.
When I was an active substance abuse counselor, almost thirty years time span, I observed over time how insurance companies restricted and pulled back what they would and would not pay for. I ran into situations where the people making the decisions did not know anything about treatment or the issues found in the substance abuse field. I also ran into situations where those making decisions in the insurance industry were therapists, doctors, but whose decisions were based, not on the treatment issues at hand, or how a client was progressing in therapy. I had one doctor say to me, "This client has been in treatment many times. This is the last time. The client has burned too many bridges. Obviously, this client is not serious. We will not pay for any further sessions."
How can that person play God? There are so many instances where people have to relapse several times before he/she can get a footing. It is just the nature of the treatment issue. And I personally, have seen people, when insurance companies where more generous, go in and out of substance abuse treatment many times, before they were finally able to stay sober.
It finally came to a point, where, in order for a person to have treatment extended the client had to be either suicidal or homicidal. Now, if someone was neither, but was obviously still in severe need of therapy, having only those choices available was, in my opinion, cruel and inhumane. I had clients who chose the suicidal route, because they knew they just could not be discharged. Now, how unfair is that?
A client has to lie, then have it go onto their medical record, just to obtain the treatment needed to help build a solid foundation for recovery? And of course one of the mandates of recovery is honesty - honesty - honesty!
Then I have another beef, and that's with treatment providers/agencies who let the insurance companies mandate treatment. I saw it time and again, where, a client who was not ready to be discharged was ordered to be discharged, because the agency would not strongly advocate for the client. The therapist could not strongly advocate for the client through fear of being disciplined or fired. What's wrong with that picture?
For anyone working in the field, yes, insurance does cost and treatment is costly, but, consider the alternatives? When treatment is not adequate enough, relapse is inevitable. What's the cost to society in terms of jail time? Hey folks, who pays the taxes for people to go to jail? Who pays the courts? The funeral expenses? The loss of work time to employers? The tentacles are far reaching and far more costly than what it would cost for insurance to pay for adequate treatment.
Though, I've not heard of anyone going to jail for an eating disorder, but, what about the emotional and mental costs to families and employers? What about the "hidden costs to society?"
Not to mention the heartache - who can put a figure onto that? Unfortunately, this was one of the core reasons I could not, ethically, remain in the treatment field. I could not stand watching someone relapse when I knew and felt in my gut that just a few more days or a week could've made all of the difference.
Thus, I cannot urge enough, those of you seeking treatment, no matter what the issue, ADVOCATE, ADVOCATE, ADVOCATE! Create a support system who can help you to do that, too, so you can keep your focus on treatment issues. Taking on the system is daunting!
Please let your state and federal representatives, lawmakers, know the struggles you experience, whatever country you live in. They make the laws. Don't give up! DON'T GIVE UP!
And, if you are having a serious problem, e-mail me. I would gladly publish your story. It may help others.
Blessings!
Please see: EatingDisordersCoalition.org
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
One of the most devastating as well as rewarding aspects of my counseling career was when my clients were attempting to heal from addiction and sexual assaults.
Devastating? Only the victim of a sexual assault can know the full devastation and despair that occurs when one's framework of trust and faith in humanity is grotesquely violated and sometimes violated repeatedly through acts of sexual violence. To observe the depths of pain and how the tentacles of it permeate all areas of the victim's living arenas is heart wrenching to say the least.
Rewarding? The healing process to me is truly spiritual and magical. Human beings, despite intense, severe pain can be so resilient! To have witnessed the healing process humbles me. To all those victims/survivors who placed their trust in me, to help them in their recovery was a great honor. I will go to my grave holding you all up with the utmost of respect and dignity.
When I say magical, please know that I do not mean this as whimsical, nor do I mean to diminish the tough work involved in the process. How the healing process happens is a wonderment to me. How people can turn pain into a solid foundation and wisdom is beyond remarkable. There are no words to describe this process in a way that would do it justice. However, in comparison, it may be likened to witnessing the glory of a snow-topped mountain range, or a sunset or sunrise resplendent in colors. Or, stepping out in the evening when the sky is jammed with stars! Tears can be turned to joy!
Is the healing process easy? Based upon my experience, it is not. It is work. But the rewards are fantastic! Will healing hurt? Sometimes, taking out a splinter is painful. But when the splinter is removed, relief follows. The pain diminishes.
Yes, the healing process can be exceedingly painful depending upon many factors. For each victim/survivor the process is different.
If, dear reader, you have been a victim, take back your control! Take back your power! You owe it to yourself to get help and experience the rewards of healing and peace. Don't let your attacker have any more of you!
Again, a word of caution - please do not use self-help books without the assistance of a trained, licensed professional. Trauma of this nature often consists of repressed memories and emotions. To proceed on your own is honorable but could cause more damage and trauma!
Blessings!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
First, that pro-eating disorder websites are allowed on the web is a severe, egregious, ethical violation to me. Eating disorders can be fatal. Anyone enticed to enter into one of these sites runs the risk of not seeking help, remaining with the condition and putting themselves at grave risk for great physical and mental harm.
It reminds me of a group of alcoholics or drug addicts hanging out. Without some intervening force, what motivation would provide the impetus to break free? The addictive voices have free rein. And that's how I see these pro-eating disorder websites. The voice of the eating disorder is allowed to run free. Thus, the delusional thinking is allowed to run free and rampant, only chaining the eating disordered sufferer more firmly to the condition.
I am especially, deeply disturbed, that teenagers, given their own vulnerabilities, are the ones most tempted to enter these sites. To further my angst, knowing that such web communities as Facebook and MySpace allow these communities to exist, in my opinion, violates a code of honor - violates trust.
Please know, that I do understand that the isolation and loneliness surrounding the eating disordered sufferer is a profound and debilitating aspect of the condition. Thus, these non-recovery sites provide an enticing, welcomed hook. No more isolation! At last someone understands me!
It reminds me of catching fish. The hook is disguised by a worm or some other enticing bit of bait. Once the fish latches onto it the hook ensnares the fish. Quite frankly, that's all I can think of.
These communities say they have the freedom to choose their anorexic or bulimic lifestyle. This, is delusional thinking. It may appear they have the choice, but, like alcoholism and drug addiction, after a while the mind and body crosses a line where there is no choice, except the choice to pursue a path of recovery. That path of recovery means investigating the underlying issues that brought on the disordered eating patterns to begin with, for starters. Recovery means understanding what the eating disorder voice is saying that is not healthy. It means understanding that perfection is an illusion, it cannot be obtained. Recovery means changing the thinking patterns and finding support in recovery with recovering eating disordered sufferers, not support to stay in the disorder.
If anyone reading this is seeking help, seek help with trained professionals. Seek help and support in recovering communities, not communities that actively endorse remaining in the condition. Afterall, who, in their right mind would say, "Alcoholism is great! Stay an alcoholic! Drug addiction is great! Stay an addict!"
The same holds true for eating disorders.
And, if you are a teenager reading this, please know, that the recovering community understands what you are suffering with. Go to the recovering community for help and support. Eating disorders can be fatal! Don't let it claim your life or the life of someone you love!
God Bless!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
I heartily believe in the spiritual realms, the invisible realms, as I like to call them. Realms that cannot be seen, usually with human eyes.
Why angels? First, I do believe that Scripture is the inspired word of God, and since Scripture makes claims that angels exist, then I can believe in the existence of the creatures/servants of God with surety.
Any other reasons? Yes! I've had numerous close calls through out my life. Close calls, that, if, they had followed through, would have resulted, most probably, in my demise.
For instance, more than once I have gone off the road due to bad weather conditions. The first time, I slide through a stop sign onto a busy street. I hit the horn hard. Fortunately, the passengers in the car coming through heard the horn and were able to avoid me, but they hit a telephone pole, going about 45 mph.
Neither of us were hurt.
Another time, I hit a deer that had run out in front of my vehicle. The car slid on ice and I ended up in the only opening in a stone wall. Unfortunately, the poor animal was not so fortunate.
Another time I slid off the road in bad weather, I ended up on top of a stone wall, narrowly missing a telephone pole.
The next one, to this day, sets me into a reflective mode. About 25 years ago, I was going to school in Boston. Sometimes I took the train from the Beverly Depot into North Station in Boston.
This particular afternoon, the temperature was 50 degrees below zero. I well remember this, because I had heard the weather report before I left my home.
The Depot was deserted. The parking lot was a sheet of ice. Of course, I got stuck and couldn't move either forwards or backwards. I had nothing in the car to throw under the tires as well. Now what? Panic was setting in.
Then I noticed a young man, perhaps in his late 20s walking towards the Depot. He was at least a block away from where I was. Now what struck me, was, here the temperature wind chill factor is minus 50 degrees. This young man was dressed in the style of the day, business casual with a light sweater vest - no coat, mittens or any kind of protective outer clothing for this kind of cold weather.
He was almost 2 blocks away from where I was. He continued walking. As I watched him, he walked right up to my vehicle. I was driving a Volkswagen bug at the time. He placed his bare hands on the vehicle and gave a push. A push I didn't even feel, and I was free. When I swung the vehicle around, he had disappeared. I couldn't see him anywhere. I drove around the Depot and the streets nearby, but I could not find him. I had wanted to thank him and offer him a ride.
I truly believe this person was an angel.
There are more stories, but these, especially the last one are the best.
A friend of mine who was recently hospitalized with some serious pneumonia had had four visitors to her hospital room. When she asked the three who were good friends of hers, who the fourth person was with them, they were perplexed, because they could not see the fourth individual. My friend truly believes that an angel had accompanied them.
Got any angel stories? I'd love to hear them!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
My series of articles focusing about specific, life threatening problems associated with disordered eating, I hope, especially for young people reading, will raise awareness to the seriousness of these conditions.
Though I do not want to raise a "scare," I do want to raise a respect for the almost miraculous functioning, or, what I believe to be the almost miraculous functioning of the human body. Tampering with it not only has an initial impact, but interrelated ripple impacts. One system is connected to another system. If one malfunctions and isn't remedied, it can lead to the malfunctioning of other systems.
Bulimic Vomiting, Stomach Acid and Ailments
Dehydration and Eating Disorders
Osteoporosis and Eating Disorders
Disordered eating cannot be taken lightly, or even idolized. I will be doing an article about these pro-anorexia sites in the near future. I am personally horrified that there are people out there who find this life threatening condition something to be sought after and praised.
I am continually upset about the emphasis the entertainment, advertising and modeling world places upon being ridiculously thin to achieve success.
People can die for any number of complications due to disordered eating. Organs fail, are damaged and shutdown, for any number of reasons due to disordered eating.
I am amazed at how intricate and honed a machine the human body is right down to the smallest of details. Fortunately, the human body can take some amount of abuse. However, over a prolonged period of time, especially for the young, the damages can hold far reaching ramifications.
I also cannot emphasize enough that, should any information in any of the articles raise a concern, please, please, please seek professional, qualified help. These articles are not intended in any manner to diagnose or treat conditions.
Blessings to all! :)
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
I know when I was a substance abuse counselor, having the family involved with the treatment aspects of the identified client was such a help for the client.
Sometimes, the client didn't know, see or understand how much the family cared until everyone was in treatment. So many times parents felt so trapped, that they didn't know they had any influence until they became involved in treatment.
Fact, is parent(s), you have lots of power and lots of clout! The evidence of this may not show immediately, but for most families, the impact will show in time.
First, family therapy helps to sort out the family dynamics. Once those are sorted out, parents are shown how to do things differently, which, can help them become empowered rather than victimized by whatever the issue happens to be.
For instance for those parents who have a teenager using drugs, alcohol, you're in for a rough, rocky road. But, knowing how alcohol and drugs impact a teenager, with the help of therapeutic counseling and Al-anon, you can develop coping skills that not only help your teen, but helps you to keep your sanity. The same holds true for eating disorders, and, I suspect, any other issue that makes family life feel as though a tornado is constantly swirling within the family unit.
Secondly, don't give up hope. Kids, even if they don't look like they're listening, even if they are thrusting all of their anger upon you, it may look hopeless, but it isn't. Kids are listening. Kids will feel your love and your sense of hope. They may not recognize it at the time, but when moments of serenity and clarity prevail upon them they will feel the dedication, love and loyalty. You are the calm in their storm. You are the rock they need for a foundation.
And as some of you already know, they can test you to your limits. They can push buttons you never knew existed! Love them through it, for however long it takes, and it may take a very long time. Be prepared for the long haul.
Again, counseling can help you determine where to put the boundaries. For instance, as in alcohol and drug abuse, you don't want to be bailing them out of the circumstances, even though you want to show them you care and are ready to help them. Bailing out, means, they never feel the severity of the consequence. If they don't feel the severity, what reason do they have to change?
Even for situations that look hopeless, continue to care, continue to show love - you just never know where, when or how a change or changes will happen. But, get help for yourselves as well. Make sure that you are rested and are healthy. Make sure you are eating and exercising.
And for those of you who believe in the power of prayer, pray. Prayer not only helps you, but has been known to help the child. Believe it or not, when children see a parent reach out to a higher power, it humbles them, though they may not readily admit it. They learn humility by the influence of a praying parent. They learn to reach out for answers. They learn it is OK to say, "I don't know, and I am trying to find out."
Yup, it ain't easy! But who ever said parenting was? I personally think being a parent is the hardest and yet the most rewarding/awesome responsibility, role, job, that anyone could shoulder. Give yourselves a pat on the back! Applaud your efforts! Be kind to yourselves and reward yourselves now and again. You deserve it!
Happy Easter for all who celebrate this holiday, for those of you who do not - many blessings upon yourselves and your families! :).
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
Janell Smith's suicide is a prime example of an insurance company running treatment. Let an insurance company mandate treatment and see what happens. Janell Smith weighed a mere 68 pounds when she was admitted into intensive inpatient treatment. She needed a feeding tube to live. Three weeks later, her weight beginning to creep into the 70s, the insurance company, "pulls the plug" on her treatment, mandating that she be transferred to an outpatient modality.
Now I have two issues here:
- Insurance companies should not be mandating treatment; and,
- Look at the attitude behind the "pulling the plug" statement.
Insurance Companies Mandating Treatment
I know insurance companies mandate treatment. I had more battles with insurance companies when I was a substance abuse counselor, to such an extent, that, I left the profession. I did not feel I could ethically provide the kind of treatment necessary with the rigidity I faced. Insurance companies would tell me that unless a client was suicidal or homicidal, their stay and payment would not be extended. This was the information I had to communicate to my clients. Fortunately, no one to my knowledge committed suicide, but I consider that a divine gift. But, so many times, when I had to discharge my clients, I wondered if I would be facing a lawsuit down the road. Thank God, that did not happen to me.
If an insurance company wants that much control, than a licensed professional from the insurance company must be present at the intake process and throughout the treatment process. Additionally, that insurance representative, must listen and comply with the recommendations of the treatment team, not the other way around. As far as I am concerned, insurance companies have way too much power and control. My heart goes out to Janell's family.
"Pulling the Plug"
I am fascinated with the "Pulling the plug" statement the insurance company made. Just look at the arrogant attitude behind that statement! No compassion what so ever!
Personally, I hope the family wins. Of course this will not bring Janell back to her family, but maybe some justice will be obtained. Maybe, insurance companies will sit up and learn some humility.
Unfortunately, I don't know what to suggest if any of you are facing this kind of a situation. Maybe, calling your state or federal representatives. I really don't know. However, I will be trying to find out. And, please, if any of you know what to do, please let me know!
God Bless! Thank you for reading!
An update: Apparently there has been an outcome. I haven't had a chance to completely decipher the ruling, but here's the link I've found, if anyone wants to read it:
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
A reflection. I truly hope that the articles I recently published regarding teenage suicide and eating disorders and suicide have not led anyone to consider suicide. This was by far not the intent of these articles. In fact, the exact opposite of the intent of these articles.
If any reader has any serious intentions of committing suicide, please, please please seek professional help! Suicide is NEVER a good solution! There's is no turning back from it. It leaves a trail of tears and grief that family and friends are stuck with the remainder of their lives. For this factor alone, suicide is not a perfect option. We all need help from time to time.
If self-loathing or self-hatred is an issue, I know these are internal messages/emotions that somehow are misguided - became tangled somehow with life's experiences. Certainly I know people can be hurt physically, emotionally and mentally to where they begin to think they deserve to be hurt, or they begin to hate themselves because of life's circumstances. Depression can lead to suicidal thinking.
Regarding body image and eating disorders, I have found in my research that, in the days when the emphasis was on internal beauty and survival, there is no mention of eating disorders. Perhaps they existed, but in all of my reading of history, I cannot find any mention of disordered eating. Probably because people were too busy living and carrying on their responsibilities of the day. And again, beauty was considered more of an internal virtue - honesty, honor, caring for one's family, etc.
If you are considering suicide, please seek professional help. I truly believe that every life has a purpose. And I truly believe that for everyone, one purpose is to make earth and our communities a better place to live. Your life is important. There are people who can help, whatever the situation is. Get help! See your school counselor! See your primary care physician! See a licensed professional counselor!
See sunshine again! You are valued!
God Bless! Thank you for reading!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
I was traveling somewhere, when I stopped at a local Dunkin' Donuts for a coffee-to-go. While waiting in line, I chanced upon a talk show hosted by Dr. James Dobson, noted doctor of psychology. The topic was teenage suicide. Though a depressing topic, I was drawn to it, and I listened intently. As I listened, I felt an intense urge to write about it.
No one is exempt from committing suicide, given the right combination of factors. What those factors might be, are different for each of us. Intense depression can certainly be one factor, as well as an overwhelming sense of no way out.
As a society, are we stressing out our young people? The teenage years are stressful enough. Have we overloaded them to such a degree that for some, they just cannot cope with it all?
I know for myself, I would not want to be a teenager in today's world. When I was teenager, about all I had to think about, along with the kids I hung out with was, the opposite sex, dating, getting good grades, preparing for college, finding a part-time job and getting my driver's license. Though, towards my last year of high school, alcohol and drugs became popular. Not for me, however. I saw bright classmates become burn-outs. The change terrified me enough to steer clear of he chemicals.
These days kids are hit with, all of the above, plus, a rising number of blended family dynamics, intense pressure from the media to be thin and beautiful to be successful (male and female), early sex/birth control, violence everywhere, even on the home front, a heightened sense of not trusting another person, the possibility of in-school shootings, and the poor economy.
These are just my observations. I'm sure some of you might be able to think of more. For the most part, I grew up during a time when life was less complicated. There was a high degree of safety and surety. I could walk down the street and not be afraid of who I might encounter. There was a higher degree of respect. Schools were safe. Parents and teachers made sure the schools were safe. If a student disrespected a teacher or another student, you paid for it at home as well as in school.
I'm just saying that, our teenagers need all the support we can give them. Expecting them to figure it all out on their own is a fantasy. Even as an adult, I know I can't figure it all out.
Eating disorders and the pressure to be thin adds yet, another dimension to the suicide dilemma. Adults can filter out some of the messages the media likes to pound us with. Teenagers have a harder time doing so.
When I wrote about Janell's Smith's suicide I was reading through some of the comments on the CBS site. It amazed me how little some people know about the dynamics of suicide, drug abuse and eating disorders.
Though I do not want anyone to leave feeling depressed, when members of society are hurting or suffering, it has a ripple effect upon all of us. Please, if any has concerns regarding suicide, seek professional help. Ignoring the red flags, could cost someone his or her life.
Be blessed! Thanks for reading!
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
I was sadly disappointed to see that only a few events seem to be scheduled for Eating Disorder Awareness Week in the U.S. How is this? Is there still such a lack of awareness/education about this condition, or...?
I even called the only eating disorder treatment program in the the state of Maine, and have not had a reply. I will just have to call them again.
I noticed, doing some research that the state of Maine had a legislative group do some reviewing about the ED issues in Maine, in 2005, but have not uncovered any additional information as of yet.
If there are any Mainers reading, if you know of anything, please contact me. You may leave a comment here on the blog, or through my articles there is an e-mail connection.
If you are reading from any other state and know of any events, please let me know.
Remember, eating disorders can be fatal. Please seek professional help. Many people do recover.
Have a great day! Jeannie
P.S. I did finally speak to someone from the treatment resource in Maine ( mentioned above) and will be interviewing both the Medical Director and Program Manager next week. I'm curious what information they can enlighten me with as far as Maine is concerned. Of course, I will share the info will you! :)
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
Parents who are coping with eating disorders, or some other mental health condition, or a disability or whatever it happens to be that is outside the norm, need help. Their best source of help is one another. When they present a committed, solid front, their example is strongly felt by their kids and will later be appreciated, at least, that has been my experience when I was an active counselor.
Parents divided hurt their kids. Kids look to their parents for security and answers and role modeling. When the parents are not on the same page with one another, the kids see that as a weakness and will seek to make it even weaker. Add an eating disorder, or a drug addiction, or a disability and divide and conquer can become the name of the game.
Trials can bring people closer or drive them apart. Any obstacle is easier to face when it is not faced alone. My heart goes out to parents.
I especially appeal to parents who are divided. For the sake of your kids, try to work together, even if you are not in complete agreement with one another, especially when there is an eating disorder or an addiction within the family unit.
Try to keep an open mind. Submit yourself to education. Participate in the treatment suggestions of the professionals. By your example, you will be showing your affected kiddo that you have courage and are not afraid to tackle the unknown. You will lead by example. Oh, the results might not be readily visible, but, down the line, you will see or hear the result.
I ask any parents out there who are reading, please offer suggestions or make comments. You will be helping someone else, I am sure, especially if your spouse has not been on the same page. How did you handle it? How have you been coping?
From the core of my heart, I believe parenthood is one of the most awesome, fearsome, responsibilities any human can shoulder.
To all, never give up! Don't lose heart! God Bless! Jeannie
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
I would specifically like to address this blog to the concerned parties of loved ones suffering from either eating disorders or addiction.
There are stages of change. Recognizing them can give some clues as to how to cope with each stage. Also, the help of trained professionals is highly encouraged.
The first few stages (see above link), involve loving encouragement - letting the sufferer know that he or she is loved, that the concerned parties are worried. Gently reflecting back to the sufferer the nature of their condition is one means of handling resistance. Having lots of informational material lying around, in the bathroom, or on the bed (in the bedroom), gives the sufferer a chance to read without everyone looking. Especially during the first stage of change (precontemplative), you don't want to address the problem head on. You will be met with stubborn refusal and resistance.
Remember there are two active voices working. One voice is the healthy voice, however, that is being pounded down by the eating disorder or addiction voice. You want to appeal to the healthy voice. It is there, despite the bravado the unhealthy voice is portraying.
Also remember, that eating disorders and addictions have payoffs. You are hoping to shift the payoffs in your favor, not to appease the eating disorder or the addiction.
This is especially difficult coping with teenagers. They are so vulnerable. With their youth comes lots of energy that they will pour into keeping the eating disorder or addiction, especially if the payoffs are fantastic!
Seek out support professional help and support groups. Hearing what other concerned parties are coping with can help reasure you that you are not going crazy! Plus, you may learn some tips as to what has worked for others. Connect with the professionals in your area where eating disorders and addictions are their focus of expertise.
God Bless! :)
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
It is unlikely that anyone hopes for an eating disorder or some kind of a substance abuse addiction, but, they happen. With alcohol and drugs, in most cases, there is a choice not to use. This doesn't include instances where medication is needed after major surgery for pain. But the choice to have a drink or pick up a joint or, or, is a choice not a necessity. If it has become a necessity, than serious evaluation is in order.
The Psyche
With an eating disorder, like an addiction, as the cycle intensifies, so does the denial system and psyche "damage". I say "damage" cautiously. Normal, rational reasoning goes out the window. The eating disorder like the addiction takes over. Reasoning is done through the perception of the eating disorder/addiction. These afflictions develop ears and voices of their own.
Anyone reading this who is in the mire of an eating disorder or substance abuse addiction may see this information differently, as I would expect them to.
Get Help
Because of the inability to see reality as it really is, the help of others is much needed. Without help and intervention eating disorders and substance abuse addictions can eventually cause loss of life, not to mention the heartache suffered by loved ones.
If you have any suspicion, dear reader, that you may have an eating disorder or an addiction, get help. Seek out a family doctor or therapist or licensed professional. Not only will you save your own life, but you will prevent much heartache to those who love you, and quality of life for all will improve!
Blessings! Jeannie
Posted by Jeannie Delahunt
Perhaps some of the Christmas holiday cheer is still lingering with me. I had such a sense to do some articles around prayer, that I just had to follow it!
If you have had any special answers to prayer, please share! No doubt it will raise the faith and hope of others! I'm sure encouragement is sorely needed!
I do believe in the power of prayer, and my prayer for all the faithful readers of Suite is that you are blessed with a FANTASTIC New Year!
I am also asking for ideas around eating disorders. I'm finding in my research that the subject materials are rather limited.
Additionally, if you have a story to share (eating disorders or substance abuse and recovery), know that personal stories do help others! I can do a story without using the real name. One of the main goals of this particular subject is to help others.
With that in mind, go celebrate the New Year, safely! Many Blessings! :)