The Controversy of Saying "I Love You"

Posted by Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen Apr 14, 2007

Someone gave me a "thumbs down" on StumbleUpon on my article, 64 Ways to Say "I Love You" because it simply states how not to be a s**t to your lover. Too much common-sense, he said, not enough innovation.

I was insulted at first -- receiving criticism isn't exactly my favorite activity - but then I thought about it a little. The guy is 23 years old; I wonder how his youth affects his perspective? I mean, if you've been married for any amount of time you know that it really is the little things that count - it's not the grandiose gestures (trips to Paris and romantic candlelit dinners.). It's putting the toilet seat down and actually listening and saying what you really mean.

I also wonder if this guy is married, or in a relationship. I wonder what his partners think of him, and if he does show his affection. Does he really know how not to be a s**t to his lover -- and if so could he share his insights? Finally, I found it interesting that he's British! I have these stereotypical views of them: stiff upper lip, not showing emotion, not expressing love. Of course I'm being prejudicial......but don't stereotypes exist for a reason?

Anyway, he gave me the Thumbs Down a couple weeks ago, and I've been mulling over it ever since. Not just because I'm a little insulted, but because I really think those little things are the ones that really count. They do in my relationship, anyway. If you have an opinion or want to share your perspective, I've started a discussion called "I Love You controversy."

Give it a visit, tell me what you think about love, loving, and lovers!