My Best Friend is and Addict

Posted by Lura Seavey Sep 21, 2006

But it hasn't always been this easy.I have known her since she was sixteen years old, when she was in a residential treatment facility for teens with drug abuse and mental health issues. Over the past seven years, I have watched her progress, fall, get up again, and then seemingly dig herself deeper into the downward spiral of addiction to drugs and alcohol, usually heroin. Having grown to love her and understand her as I would a little sister, and watching her frustrated family throw their hands up in despair, I vowed to myself that I would never give up on her.

When not using drugs or alcohol, this young woman is intelligent, loving, caring, and selfless. But like any addict or alcoholic, when the substances are added to her body she becomes a different person. Where I had laid trust, I discovered lies and theft, and where I had placed my hopes there seemed to be nothing. So what was I to do as I watched her slowly kill herself?

There would be weeks or months when the phone would not stop ringing, asking for money or a place to stay. I did my best to provide the things I felt she needed without feeding her addictions, while going to Al-Anon to keep myself healthy. I talked about sobriety, getting to AA meetings or counseling, finding a safe place. She would agree as long as I was helping her maintain. I shared my own experiences and introduced her to other women who might do the same and be good role models. There were periods when she would clean up, clear-minded, and begin to grasp a sense that she didn't have to live day to day as a junkie anymore.

Worst were the months on end that I wouldn't hear from her at all, and I would begin to dread that call from her mother or father letting me know when to attend her funeral. Although the constant wear of desperate calls was stressful, the silent waiting and praying was far worse.

Today she has two very young children, one whom she has lost custody of due to her drug use. She was sober when she had her second child, and is fighting hard for her own sobriety and education because she has finally, truly realized that her actions are not only affecting her.

For some, it takes only the threat of losing things that are important to us. For others, it takes stark reality giving us a kick in the butt to wake us up and truly motivate us to do what's best for ourselves. Does she have a guarantee to stay sober? Was it all of my dedication that's gotten her where she is today? No, and no. Her sobriety, her recovery is in her own hands - but it can't hurt anyone to have a hand to hold when the going gets rough.

What's your story? Let us know in Discussions, or email me if you would like to share it in a more private setting.

For more personal stories, Click Here