Seat kicker makes long flight even longer

Posted by Bridget Lux Jul 18, 2006

I make it a point, generally, to make the best of any situation - especially one I know won't be entirely pleasant. Long plane rides fall into that category, but after numerous cross-Atlantic, cross-country and other flights, I've got a routine down that helps ease the discomfort. Now, I won't go as far as to say that I enjoy these long flights, but it would be safe to say that I no longer dread them. Or at least I didn't.

First, my formula for finding the joy - that's right, joy - in a three-plus-hour flight. Basically, I try to look at the flight as being a time to read. I bring a nice historical novel (my version of a trashy romance), and settle in. I also bring plenty of my favorite snacks (Snackwells creme-filled cookies, red vines, pretzles, etc.). For a really long flight to say Australia or Europe, I bring along the big guns: mini bottles of booze. I was shocked to learn recently that it's not kosher to byob on some flights, but I've never been scolded for doing so.

Then, I check out the movie offering. Now, generally, the movies shown on planes aren't exactly what I would choose ... and that's great. I look at it as an adventure of a different sort. No, I would never knowingly rent or go to the theater to see "Eight Below," but it was OK. Certainly entertaining and helped pass the time, which, for me, is the point on long plane rides.

Finally, I pack my laptop, which is filled with games, episodes of the Gilmore Girls I have yet to indulge in, French lessons and music.

So, it was with this arsenal that I stepped on the plane in London bound for Houston recently. The flight was nearly 10 hours long and I knew I'd probably need every bit of my snack and entertainment stashes to get through. Little did I know that the child behind me had her own arsenal or how adversely it would affect me. I had no defense. All the red vines and Gilmore quips in the world couldn't make up for the seat-back kicking that went on nearly non-stop for the entire flight.

Even my backup, super-duper plane-time weapon was useless: I couldn't even think about falling asleep.

The real kicker? I had traded seats with a man so he could sit next to his wife.

Yes, I asked the child's mother to please stop her from kicking my seat. My request was received with a look of disinterest in my plight.

The moral of my tale? I'm not sure. I would hope parents would make sure their children aren't doing this to other people, but that's probably too much to wish for. I'll certainly be more careful the next time I get on a flight to make sure I avoid this situation at all costs. Or maybe I just need to pack more whiskey.