Feeling Depressed After Adopting

Posted by Crystal Killion Apr 8, 2008

After I adopted my newborn daughter, I was surprised to find myself crying for no reason. I felt depressed, moody, and absolutely worn-out. On top of that, I felt terribly guilty for having these feelings. After all, I had longed for another baby for years. My husband and I tried everything before turning to adoption and now here she was- our dream come true! What was wrong with me?

Post-Adoption Depression

Well, like an estimated 65% of adoptive parents, I was suffering from Post-Adoption Depression (PADS). It is similar to postpartum depression, yet very few adoption or mental health professionals recognize PADS as an actual condition. I was completely caught off-guard and alone.

How I Coped

First, I got online and armed myself with knowledge. I learned about PADS and gathered suggestions for combating it.

Next, I began to take better care of myself physically, napped when baby was napping, and relaxed my housekeeping standards for a little while. In other words, I did what any new mother should do: I took it easy while I adjusted to my new life.

Then, I networked with other adoptive parents. One such resource for me was a lady from my homeschool group who had also adopted, and had experienced many of the same symptoms that I was suffering from. I was able to draw support from her, which helped tremendously.

Adoption is a Life-Changing Experience

If you find that you need to seek professional help, allow yourself to do so without guilt. Make the time to network with other adoptive parents, either by connecting with a local support group, or online. Finally, don’t compare yourself to others! Everyone reacts differently to major life changes.

Happily, I went on to adopt two more children and haven’t looked back!