A Bloodsucker's Christmas Carol

Posted by Coral Andrews Jan 16, 2008

On the Seventh Day of... Next Christmas! (at this rate!) My Recasting Choice would be.

Nosferatu – Ebenezer Scrooge – “I feed erratically, and often enormously.”

Dracula - Marley’s Ghost – “The Blood is life and it shall be mine. Blood has always been the coin of our realm.”

Marius de Romanus - Ghost of Christmas Past – “We have no more claim upon those we kill than any creature that seeks to live."If I hadn't become a vampire, I would have missed out on the Internet, TIVO, World of Warcraft... and GPS.

The Vampire Lestat de Lioncourt - Ghost of Christmas Present – “Tell me how bad I am. It always makes me feel good.”

Mick St John - Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come - “If I hadn't become a vampire, I would have missed out on the Internet, TIVO, World of Warcraft... and GPS”

Claudia - Tiny Tim - "I shall never grow up.”

Mr. Cratchit – Louis de Point Du Lac – “What if all I have is my suffering, my regret? ”

Mrs. Chatchit – Jesse Reeves – “All a vampire has is time. I’m not as precious as you think.”

Mrs. Dilber - Miriam Blaylock - “When you need to feed, you will need me to show you how.”

Old Fezziwig – Grandpa Munster - “Oh, what I wouldn't give for a nice Bloody Mary. Or Dorothy or Emily.”

Seven Seething Fang Meisters feeding on Six Sit com siblings fighting over Five Bowls of Lasgana for Four Siamese shadows, scaring Three dog-blasted-ornery-no-acount-long-eared-varmaints, Two bottles of Prozac and Tony Soprano joined by Yosemite Sam trying to whack the flea-bitten Tribble drinking lots of Romulan Ale in the Tree.