Jerry Lopper's Blog
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Plato (470 - 399 BC), followed his mentor, Socrates, and became an Athenian philosopher. Plato, in turn, mentored Aristotle.
Plato believed that all human knowledge is simply recollection. He believed the soul was immaterial, i.e. immortal, and existed before inhabiting a body. In this form the soul had access to all knowledge. Therefore, when humans come to know something it is because our souls recollect what they knew before materializing in a body.
This is the same concept furthered by many of today's spiritual writers, including Neale Donald Walsch and his Conversations with God series.
Source: The Intellectual Devotional, David S. Kidder & Noah D. Oppenheim
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Sharpen your mind and exercise your brain with this number series mind puzzle. Mind and mental exercises such as this mind teaser help to keep your brain young. Enter your answers in the Mind Exercise Answer discussion.
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Exercise:
Remember your high school algebra? This will give you the chance to brush up on it. Or you can ask one of your kids to solve it for you.
Add you to me, divide by three,
The square of you, you'll surely see,
But me to you is eight to one,
One day you'll work it out my son.
Source: The Complete Book of Fun Maths, Philip Carter & Ken Russell
Solution here
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Somewhat surprisingly, coffee has been found to protect us from a variety of ailments, from cavities to colon cancer. And unlike most things in life best served by moderation, some say the more coffee we drink, the better our protection.
Studies indicate that coffee consumption can prevent the onset of Type II Diabetes. Other studies show that coffee helps to prevent colon cancer as well as Parkinson's Disease.
"Overall, the research shows that coffee is far more healthful than it is harmful," says Tom DePaulis, PhD, research scientist at Vanderbilt University’s Institute for Coffee Studies. "For most people, very little bad comes from drinking it, but a lot of good."
Source: AARP The Magazine, January & February, 2007 and Vanderbilt Brain Institute News
Posted by Jerry Lopper
The new and growing field of positive psychology offers much good advice with loads of tips to help your pursuit of happiness and the good life.
Good Life Tip:
The more autonomy and freedom of choice in our lives, the happier we are. Look for opportunities in your daily life, at work and home, to express your free choice and independence. Even the most restrictive job may provide opportunities for free choice in how your responsibilities are completed.
If nothing else, your demeanor on the job is up to you. Choose a demeanor that helps you feel good about who you are and what you do.
Taking this a step further, enhance the happiness opportunity for those you care about by giving them the freedom of choice. This is the foundation of unconditional love, to grant the freedom to another to be themselves
Source: Positive Psychology and Coaching, P.A. Linley
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Sharpen your mind and exercise your brain with this mind puzzle. Mind and mental exercises such as this mind teaser help to keep your brain young.
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Exercise:
Peter is twice as old as Paul was when Peter was as old as Paul is now.
The combined ages of Peter and Paul is 56 years.
How old are Peter and Paul now?
Source: The Complete Book of Fun Maths, Philip Carter & Ken Russell
Answer is here
Posted by Jerry Lopper
We tend to think of The Greenhouse Effect as something harmful, the unnatural increase in carbon dioxide in our atmosphere that is contributing to global warming. But there's also a very natural and beneficial phenomenon termed the greenhouse effect. Without this effect, the earth would not support life.
When energy from the sun reaches the earth's surface, some is absorbed and some is reflected back into space. Water vapor, carbon dioxide, methane, and other gases--known collectively as greenhouse gases--trap some of the outgoing energy, like the glass of a greenhouse.
Without this effect, the earth would be too cold to support life. Instead, the earth's surface is maintained at a hospitable 60 degrees F.
Source: The Intellectual Devotional, David S. Kidder & Noah D. Oppenheim
Posted by Jerry Lopper
A five-year study of over 2800 seniors indicates that mental exercises through cognitive training can slow age-related mental decline. The seniors, mean age 74, received one of three different types of mind exercise training depending on the one of four groups to which they were assigned: training in reasoning, memory training, speed of processing training, and no training for the fourth, or control group.
Participants in reasoning training reported significantly less difficulty in the activities of daily living compared with the control group. The study's general conclusions are, "Reasoning training resulted in less functional decline in self-reported IADL (instrumental activities of daily living).
Compared with the control group, cognitive training resulted in improved cognitive abilities specific to the abilities trained that continued 5 years after the initiation of the intervention."
Reasoning training involved learning strategies for finding the pattern in a letter or word series and identifying the next item in the series.
You can find this type of mind exercise every week right here on the Personal Development page of Suite101.com. A recent example is here.
Source: WebMD.com Medical News and The Journal of the American Medical Association, Dec. 20, 2006
Posted by Jerry Lopper
The new and growing field of positive psychology offers much good advice and many tips to help you be happier, more fulfilled, and enjoy a good life.
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Good Life Tip:
The good life, that is, a life that is fulfilling and satisfying is characterized by strong and satisfying relationships. Research indicates a very strong correlation between the quality of a relationship and the way in which partners respond to each other's good news.
In fact, this is quantifiable. In happy relationships, the ratio of active, positive, and constructive responses to a partner's good news is more than three times the neutral or negative responses.
What is an active, positive, and constructive response? If your partner tells you that a meeting with an important client went real well today, do you respond with:
a. That's nice dear.
b. Uh-huh, wait till you hear about my day.
c. That's terrific, tell me all about it.
Of course, c. is an active, positive, and constructive response. Respond this way more than three times as often as you react with an a. or b. to strengthen your relationship.
Source: A Primer in Positive Psychology, Christopher Peterson
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Sharpen your mind and exercise your brain with this number series mind puzzle. Mind and mental exercises such as this mind teaser help to keep your brain young.
Sign up for RSS notification at the bottom of this page to be notified of new entries in the discussion thread. Click the orange icon by "how to subscribe to feeds."
Exercise:
Examine the following series of numbers and replace the question mark with the correct number:
0,3,9,18,21,27,36,?
Source: The Complete Book of Fun Maths, Philip Carter & Ken Russell
Solution here
Posted by Jerry Lopper
A black hole is a phenomenon resulting from the death of a massive star. The star collapses into itself, becoming smaller and smaller until it is reduced to a single point of infinite density. Its density is so great that nothing can escape its gravitational pull, not even light. Thus the term black hole.
Because no light can escape black holes, we can't see them. Physicists theorize they exist because of effects they see on other bodies, effects that cannot be explained without the black hole theory.
Black holes seem to defy the law of quantum mechanics that energy cannot be created nor destroyed. Questioning this, Albert Einstein once stated, "God does not play dice with the universe." Stephen Hawking countered saying, "God not only plays dice. He sometimes throws them where they cannot be seen (into black holes)."
Source: The Intellectual Devotional, David S. Kidder & Noah D. Oppenheim
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Just before a presentation I was to make at a major conference last year, I was dismayed to see a large, red, sore zit appear on my upper lip. I'm well past the age where I have to deal with zits; age spots are more my skin concern. So you can imagine how thrilled I was to imagine everyone in the room occupied more with my sore lip than my presentation.
Was there a connection between the forthcoming presentation and my new "headlight?" Ted A. Grossbart, PhD, a psychologist at Harvard Medical School in Boston, describes the connection between mind and skin in his book, Skin Deep: A Mind/Body Program for Healthy Skin. "
"All parts of the body react to our emotions, but the skin is ... the border between the inside and the outside, it's full of all the intrigue and byplay that accompanies being on the border," says Grossbart. Grossbart and others encourage people to use relaxation and stress reduction techniques, such as meditation, in addition to conventional medications to combat skin problems.
Derek H. Jones, MD, a dermatologist in private practice in Los Angeles and clinical assistant professor at the UCLA School of Medicine says, "It's well-known that when someone has psoriasis, stress tends to make the problem worse."
It appears that healthy skin is a reflection of a healthy, stress-free mind. All the more reason to regularly meditate, exercise, and eat healthy.
Related Articles:
Source: WebMD.com article
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Sharpen your mind and exercise your brain with these puzzles.
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Exercise:
A number between 1 and 50 has these characteristics:
- It is divisible by 3
- When the digits are added together the total is between 4 and 8,
- It is an odd number,
- When the digits are multiplied together the total is between 4 and 8
What is the number?
Source: The Complete Book of Fun Maths, Philip Carter & Ken Russell
Solution here
Posted by Jerry Lopper
The new and growing field of positive psychology offers good advice and tips to help you be happier, more fulfilled, and enjoy a good life.
Good Life Tip: You at Your Very Best
Recall a time in your life when you were at your very best. This may or may not be associated with high points in your life's achievements, but instead is a time when you displayed great strength of character. You'll recognize this time as one of great self pride.
For example, on my walks around the neighborhood, I will sometimes pick up and dispose of trash that I come across in a neighbor's yard. No one sees me that I'm aware of, and often I don't even know the neighbor, but I feel so proud of myself at the time. Reflecting on these times I realize that I can be generous and helpful without any external stimulus; just my own sense of responsibility and doing the right thing.
Jot down an example or two of you at your very best. Reflect on the character strengths you demonstrated and how you felt at the time. Remember, these may not be times of public achievement. Notice how you feel when thinking about the example(s) of you at your very best.
As your day unfolds look for opportunities to display these same character strengths and notice how that lifts your spirits.
Source: A Primer in Positive Psychology, Christopher Peterson
Posted by Jerry Lopper
If you hate to waste food, take a stab at this brain teaser.
Sally was planning a picnic. She wanted to serve 10 hot dogs and 6 hamburgers.
Hot dogs come 10 per package, hamburger and hot dog buns come 8 per package, and hamburger meat can be purchased in any quantity.
Sally wanted little or no leftovers.
What did she do?
Source: Fantastic Lateral Thinking Puzzles, Edward J. Harshman
Solution here.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
The placebo effect demonstrates the power of mind and faith. When given a treatment intended to heal an ailment, some finite number of people will feel better even though the treatment given was a neutral substance, a placebo.
With respect to treating pain, the placebo effect may be partially explained by brain chemistry. When the brain experiences pain it releases endorphins-chemicals that naturally act like morphine to relieve pain. Brain imaging studies show that the brain of a person taking a placebo for pain experiences that same endorphin release. Simply thinking pain would be relieved accomplished the relief!
There is also a negative placebo effect. Often, when people are told they are going to experience a negative effect from a drug, they do, even if the drug was a placebo with no medical basis for the negative effect. Again, thinking it made it so.
Interesting related fact: Painful injections may have more therapeutic value than ones that hurt less. The assumption here is that the more severe the treatment, the greater benefit.
Source: Adapted from The Intellectual Devotional by David S. Kidder & Noah D. Oppenheim
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Sharpen your mind and exercise your brain with these word puzzles.
- #1: Many adjectives end with the letters F-U-L. For example, hopeful, plentiful, and wonderful. There is one word with the last four letters of F,U, and two L's. What is this word?
- #2: The words "begins" and "chintz" have an unusual property completely unrelated to their meaning. What is that property?
Solution to #1 here
Solution to #2 here
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit which each week features a word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit includes a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Apology: An admission of wrong-doing and expression of regret.
Example: Jeremy apologized to his friend for the comment he made about her new hair style that hurt her. Though he was truly joking and didn't realize she was already sensitive to how she looked, he also knew that his unthinking remark hurt her badly. He sincerely apologized and told her how sorry he was that he spoke without thinking.
This Week: Seek out someone whose feelings you may have hurt in the past, even if you believe the event has been forgotten. Express your apology sincerely and without an underlying defensiveness. Indicate your regret at the hurt you caused and your hope that your relationship can re-establish.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were.~ Kahlil Gibran
Reflection: Letting go can be frightening because your ego believes that letting go makes you vulnerable to being rejected and hurt. In truth, controlling someone you love in order to retain their love will ultimately drive that someone away.
Related Articles:
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit which each week features a word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit includes a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Savor: To savor is to delight in a pleasant experience of the senses. Typically associated with the sense of taste, we can enhance and extend the enjoyable moments of life by mentally savoring them.
Example: Jennifer received a wonderful compliment from her friend this morning and purposefully recalled it several times that day and the next. Each time she savored the moment by rolling the pleasant sensations this compliment brought her around her mind over and over, literally tasting them each time.
This Week: Pick one pleasant moment each day and savor it. Resist the temptation to discount or take for granted pleasant moment opportunities. Drink in at least one each day and roll it around your mind, enjoying the pleasant sensations it brings you. Notice how this elevates your mood. Savor that too.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
I don't know what tomorrow will bring -- except old age and death -- but I do know that I do have today, one absolutely glorious day that I will savor and make the most of as if it were my last one... because it may be! ~Gary Fenchuk
Reflection: In each day's activities there will be a mixture of events, some that we view as positive, others we view as negative. Do you focus on the negative and take the positive for granted? Many people do.
You will be happier by focusing instead on the positive events. It won't change what occurred that day. Nothing will change the past, but when we reflect on past events we feel them again. Why not choose to feel the positives again?
Savor each positive event in each day. It not only helps you feel good, it reinforces your energy, emotion, and motivation for the next day. Play the event over in your mind. Linger with it and feel the enjoyment. Stay with it for a bit and relish it.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a feature appearing every Monday. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Commitment: Commitment is a strong word, declaring more than intent and much, much more than to try. Commitment is a dedication to do or achieve something. This dedication is non-negotiable to the committed person.
Example: Jeremy is committed to personal development. He always has one or two growth activities in process, and several more planned for the future. Don't bother trying to convince Jeremy to forego his personal growth class tonight, his attendance is non-negotiable.
This Week: Answer the question: To What Am I Committed? Write down your commitments. Are you really committed? Are these non-negotiable? Is your list inspiring and energizing?
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Oh, the comfort - the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person - having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik, A Life for a Life, 1859
Reflection: This week ask yourself if the people in your life, your loved ones as well as your close companions, can feel this inexpressible comfort with you. Dinah Craik is describing an unconditional relationship, a relationship in which no judgement is rendered, no conditions for acceptance are required, and it is safe to be open and vulnerable.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Listen: Listening is more than hearing. Listening is hearing and understanding. The trait often quoted as most admired by others is listening. Nothing will enhance a relationship more than listening carefully, generously, and completely.
Example: Jennifer is known as a great listener. Her friends love to talk with her because she always seems to understand them. They call Jennifer a great communicator, which always amuses her because she mostly just listens and offers encouraging, supportive words.
This Week: Listen to everyone with your total attention. Avoid choosing a response. Listen. Listen to the words, the tone, and the pace of the information the person is providing you. Listen to the words chosen.
What is significant about the words not chosen? What wasn't said? Listen to the gaps. What emotions do you feel from the conversation? Echo back what you believe you heard to verify you heard correctly.
Avoid the temptation to provide a solution to someone's problem. Unless specifically asked for your opinion, most people just want to be heard. Speaking their mind helps them vent and helps them formulate their own solutions. Which is what most of us really want.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Eating just three servings of vegetables each day may lessen mental degradation due to aging. A study released this week in the journal Neurology reported that participants who ate more than two vegetable servings each day appeared about five years younger on measures of mental sharpness than those who ate few or no vegetables.
The study involved nearly 2000 men and women 65 years of age and older and covered six years. Though both group's mental sharpness declined over time, the vegetable-eating group's mental decline was 40% less than the non-vegetable group.
Green leafy vegetables appeared to be the most beneficial. With the recent e.coli bacteria found in fresh spinach, this presents a dilemma for consumers. If you're still wary of fresh greens, as I am, opt for frozen varieties.
This research adds to the results of other studies which indicate that dementia may well be prevented or delayed by our lifestyle choices.
Related Articles:
Posted by Jerry Lopper
I can have peace of mind only when I forgive rather than judge. ~Gerald Jampolsky
Reflection: Judging the actions of another as right, wrong, good, or bad is hard work. It takes much effort to monitor someone's behavior, assign a judgment to it, and continue to gather the information and rationale to justify that judgment. And after all this work, it's only an opinion, nothing more.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit featuring a development tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Self-Care: Though not listed in the dictionary, self-care is still an extremely important tool of personal development. It literally means care of oneself, being responsible for and actively engaged in care for one's health, welfare, and personal growth.
Example: Several of Jeremy's friends over-indulged in life activities available to them as young, single adults with moderate incomes. Though Jeremy also participated at times, he was mindful of getting enough rest, eating healthy foods, and behaving responsibly. Jeremy believed in self-care knowing that he is in charge of his own welfare.
This Week: Evaluate your lifestyle for areas for improved self-care. These might involve your habits of eating, exercise, rest, and pleasure. Are you caring for yourself as well as you would like your loved ones to care for themselves?
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same. ~Francesca Reigler
Reflection: Attitude adjustment is a do-it-yourself project. This week choose the attitude of positive, supportive, loving connection to your work, to yourself, and to all around you. You'll be pleased at the results.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit featuring a development tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Growth: Growth means to spring up, to mature, to get larger. In a Personal Development framework growth implies moving toward your best; not necessarily more of any trait or skill, but better than before.
Example: Jennifer's career vision is to be known as a public relations guru; she sees herself giving presentations, authoring books and articles, and generally being quoted on PR topics world-wide. The forthcoming presentation to her state-wide PR society of her cutting-edge idea was a big growth step toward this vision.
This Week: As John Wooden pointed out in the inspirational quote for this week, knowing we're working toward being our best brings a level of peace and fulfillment.This week revisit your vision for your future in some aspect of your life. Then lay out a plan for the next month, next six months, and next year that provides growth toward your vision.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best you are capable of becoming. ~John Wooden
Reflection: Personal Development is about becoming your best, the best that you can be. Isn't it interesting that Wooden equates personal development with peace of mind. Striving to grow can expose us to new ways of thinking and doing, which can be uncomfortable. As you grow this week temper any discomfort with the knowledge that peace of mind lies just beneath the surface of discomfort.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a feature appearing every Monday. Each week, the Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Definition: Meditation takes many forms, but the end goal of all meditation techniques is a quiet, focused mind. When the mind is quiet, the inner wisdom we each have surfaces to help us resolve life problems. Meditation reduces stress, energizes, and is helpful in treating many physical and mental problems when done in conjunction with standard medical practices.
Example: After a stressful day at work, John devoted 15 minutes to meditation to reduce his stress level and get his energy back up so he could enjoy his family time.
This Week: Set aside 15 minutes just before bedtime to sit quietly by yourself and practice meditation. Start with a basic meditation technique here . Experiment with other forms of meditation until you find one or two that are effective for you. An effective meditation technique allows you to easily move into a quiet, focused state of mind.
The most common problem novices have is that their minds continue to ramble with self talk and problem solving. See this discussion for hints.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; ~Reinhold Niebuhr
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Reflection: Serenity is knowing that you're doing the very best that you can at the time. It may not even be your very best, but the best that you can do under current circumstances. It's important to accept that there are some things beyond your ability to change; just as important is finding the courage to act when you believe you can make a difference. To be serene is to accept oneself completely.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a new feature appearing every Monday. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Definition: Serene is a state of utter calm. Think refusal to be anxious, angry, or annoyed. Enjoy the peace and calm of being serene and the knowledge that serenity not only feels good but is good for your health too.
Example: Chaos swirled around her, yet Caroline remained serene. She watched with interest as tempers flared and accusations were hurled by everyone else. Yet she remained serene knowing that this too would pass.
This Week: Accept the challenge of remaining serene regardless of the chaos that might surround you. If you feel yourself getting caught up in a drama at home or work, remember to take deep, slow breaths, expelling anxiety and anger with each breath. Remember, this too shall pass.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity. ~W. Clement Stone
Reflection: We often find ourselves caught between wanting to please someone important to us while wanting to satisfy our own needs. Sometimes these two intentions are mutually exclusive. That's when we feel the emotional stress of a values conflict.
Often, it does take courage to stand up for ourselves and say no. Is that being selfish? Only if we never consider other's needs. It's very difficult to be there for other people until we can feel good about ourselves, so have the courage to face the truth of a values conflict and say no with compassion if that's the right thing to do.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
This morning when you awoke did you choose to be happy? I did. I was inspired by a story I read. Perhaps it will inspire you to choose to be happy tomorrow.
A 92 year old man who is dressed and shaved every morning by 8 even though he's legally blind, moved into a nursing home. As he maneuvered his walker to the elevator, an aide described his tiny room.
"I love it!" he said.
"Mr. Jones, you haven't seen your room," the aide said.
"That doesn't have anything to do with it," he replied. "Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn't depend on how the furniture is arranged. It's how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it."
"It's a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do."
"Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open, I'll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I've stored away."
I summarized this story from a column by Hap LeCrone, Cox News Service psychology columnist.
Each morning I plan to choose happiness for the day. How about you?
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
SAY NO : This week's toolkit is about saying no to requests for your time and energy that are not consistent with your values, aligned with your passions, and don't utilize your strengths. There are many ways to say no. There is simply no, no thank you, thanks for asking, but no I can't do that now, I'm pleased that you asked, but no, I can't take that on just now, and ... you know many ways to say no politely, firmly, and with appreciation for being asked.
Example: Mary: "I'm flattered that you asked me to chair the committee next year, but I've decided not to take on that responsibility. I already have two evening commitments each week and I just don't want to take more time away from my family."
This Week: Before taking on any task or responsibility of an ongoing or lengthy duration, ask yourself these questions:
- Will this responsibility be in conflict with my values?
- Am I passionate about this responsibility?
- Which of my core strengths will I be using in this responsibility?
If the answers to 1. and 2. are yes, and if you can readily identify one or more of your core strengths utilized by this responsibility, accept it eagerly. Otherwise, say no graciously.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success, his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom. ~James Allen
Reflection: Tranquility is a peaceful state of mind, a very rewarding inner serenity that shields us from unwanted external influence. Tranquility for the novice is most easily attained amidst silence. How often do you provide yourself the luxury of silence?
Is your first reaction upon starting your car to turn on the radio? When you enter your home do you quickly turn on radio, stereo, or TV? When you walk, is there always an iPod plugged into your ears? Try silence.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
If you drive don't use your cell phone. Research at the University of Utah indicates that using a cell phone while driving impairs driving ability as much as driving while intoxicated.
Ah, but I use a hands-free phone you might say, thinking that solves the problem. Unfortunately, and perhaps not intuitively, research subjects had just as many accidents on the driving simulator when using a hands-free phone as when using a hand-held one. Apparently the problem is not having one's hands occupied, it's the ensuing conversation that distracts attention.
Though cell-using drivers and intoxicated drivers were impaired differently, their overall accident rates were the same. Cell users braking reactions were slowed, while intoxicated drivers were more aggressive and followed closer to the vehicle in front of them.
If you're someone who is cautious and concerned about mixing alcohol and driving, it's time to extend that concern to cell phones. If you must phone while driving, pull over or let a passenger handle the phone chores.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Former star running back and Denver Bronco draft pick Maurice Clarett pled guilty to two felony counts yesterday in a Columbus, Ohio courtroom. The young man with unlimited football potential made a series of poor choices resulting in his dramatic fall from football star to felon. Faced with the resolve of two prosecutor's witnesses to testify, Clarett accepted a plea deal that cut his potential jail time from 30 years to 7 1/2 years, with early release in 3 1/2 years.
In Maurice Clarett's Cautionary Tale I noted that Clarett was writing his life story a chapter at a time, as we all do. It appears this latest chapter is one of admission of guilt and acceptance of punishment for ill-chosen behavior.
Still in his early 20's, Clarett's life story has more ups and downs than a roller coaster. Will his future chapters describe a man on a mission of redemption or someone continuing to spiral down toward devastation?
Only Maurice knows the theme of his next life chapter; or does he? Do you know the theme of your next chapter? You're writing it right now, you know.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a new feature appearing every Monday. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Tranquil: To be tranquil is to be calm and free from agitation. Being tranquil, regardless of the external circumstances surrounding you, allows you to be at your very best with a calmness and peacefulness that is extremely attractive to others.
Example: Susan's customer service job was often pressure packed and chaotic. Yet Susan managed to remain tranquil and effective while solving difficult customer problems. Her tranquility had a calming effect on her customers as well as her co-workers.
This Week: No matter what occurs in your life this week, strive to be tranquil, calm and peaceful both inside and out, as you go about your responsibilities. Remind yourself that "this too shall pass." Watch as your tranquil mood spreads to those around you and pay attention to how you feel about yourself.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Reflection: Your work is not who you are. It is just what you do.
Think about the current major problem facing you in your work. Will it be important to you one year from now? Think about last year's problems; those situations that seemed so crucial and took up so much of your energy and creativity. With hindsight, were they really so important to your life, your loved ones, and your happiness?
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a new feature appearing every Monday. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Biofeedback: The conscious control of a bodily function.
Example: Jeremy had a very stressful job, but learned to control the impact on his blood pressure through biofeedback. He got a home blood pressure kit and practiced breathing slowly and deeply while monitoring his pressure readings. Soon, he found he could lower his blood pressure when stress overtook him at work by focusing on deep and slow breathing.
This Week: When you feel stress or anger this week, consciously turn your attention to your blood pressure. Imagine that you have a pressure monitoring kit in place while you take very deep and slow breaths. Breath in, hold it for a count of five, and breath out slowly while counting to five. Repeat this while imagining your blood pressure readings going down. Continue this for 30 to 60 seconds or until you feel more relaxed and calm. Repeat as necessary.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do. ~Epictetus
Reflection: At any given moment, we each assume a certain state of being. Think of it as a role played in a theatre production, though we're not consciously playing a part. The behavior we exhibit reflects what we're thinking and how we're feeling. We tend to think the state of being, such as being angry, is a result of something imposed on us. How many times do we say, "Oh, she makes me so angry when..."
But of course, "she" can't really make us angry. We choose the state of being of angry in reaction to how we feel about something she did or said. Our states of being are choices. As Epictetus's quote indicates, first choose the state you prefer, then do what naturally results from it. Instead of being angry, you might choose compassionate, or understanding, or neutral. Each choice will then govern what you do and how you feel. Consciously choosing your state of being will empower you. Try it.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a new feature appearing every Monday. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Being: Being is a state of existence, a sometimes temporary role a person displays based on emotion and feeling. In a single day most people will exhibit many states of being.
Example: Jennifer was elated when her best friend thanked her for being so generous, supportive, and loyal. These are traits Jennifer admires and expects of herself.
This Week: Using the tool of awareness be conscious of who you are being for the next week. Set aside a small part of yourself to watch over you from a distance and observe who you are being as you go about your life for this week.
As you see yourself being a certain way, perhaps grumpy or picky, or critical, ask yourself if this is who you want to be right then. Perhaps the answer will be yes; that's fine, then you are conscious of who you are and are choosing the way you want to be just then. But if the answer is no, then you have the opportunity to choose another way of being, perhaps compassionate, cheery, or accepting.
Do this for one week and you'll be amazed at the conscious control you have over your life and your happiness.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
A belief is not merely an idea the mind possesses; it is an idea that possesses the mind. ~Robert Oxton Bolt
Reflection: What you and I believe governs how we think, what we do, and how we interpret and interact with the world around us. An indicator that something occurring around you is challenging or disagreeing with a belief is how strongly you react; anger or abrupt dismissal of someone or something may indicate a belief is being challenged. Personal growth often occurs when we examine and modify long-held beliefs based on new evidence.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
A recent article of the American Heart Association revealed research indicating that people who work more than 51 hours per week are 29% more likely to have hypertension than those working less than 40 hours each week.
Sampling the records of California adults, researchers found that the incidence of high blood pressure increased steadily with hours worked. Those of us who work long hours won't find this surprising, but should find it alarming. One moderating factor was that the degree of mental challenge in the job somewhat reduced this tendency toward high blood pressure.
The life threatening affects of long work hours have long been a problem for Asian workers; however, Americans now work longer hours than their Japanese counterparts.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a new feature appearing every Monday. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
A Belief is a thought we hold in our mind about something. The word belief is usually reserved for those things we hold sacred and true. We seldom question our beliefs and therein lies the opportunity for personal growth.
Example: Jennifer refuses to donate to the man who stands near her office with the hand-lettered sign, "out of work and hungry." "He could get a job if he wanted to," she says, "He's just too lazy to work."
This Week: Catch yourself automatically stereotyping someone this week. Watch yourself for instances where, without thinking, you find yourself saying, "Oh, he's a..." or "You know how she is, she always..." Automatically labeling someone is your clue that you have a belief about a certain type of person or behavior. Where did you get that belief? Is it really true all the time? Look for instances that disprove it and be open to other conclusions.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Wise men read very sharply all of your private history in your look and gait and behavior. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Reflection: What are you telling the world about who you are with your behaviors? Sharpen your awareness of everyday behavior. What messages are you sending?
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Unhappy on your job? Maybe you're not getting enough sleep. Research at the University of Florida indicates that workers who suffer from insomnia are more likely to say they dislike or even hate their job the next day.
Vince Lombardi said, "Fatigue makes cowards of us all." When we're very tired we have difficulty dealing with new situations and difficult decisions. It's tough to listen to a customer complaint with empathy when you're worn out.
Before you decide to quit your job because "it's the pits," make sure that lack of sleep isn't magnifying normal job stress and expanding your disatisfaction. If you lack sufficient sleep, the next job may not be any better.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a new feature appearing every Monday. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Behavior is a person's action or reaction to some situation or stimulus. Behavior is what we do or say in response to what someone else does or says. We don't often think about our behaviors because so many are automatic. Without even being aware of it, we look into our memory banks for similar situations and react as we did in the past.
Example: Without thinking, I stop my car when a traffic light is red; it's an automatic behavior. If I ever saw a purple traffic signal I wouldn't know what to do. This new situation would require a conscious decision before acting.
This Week: Pay special attention to everything you do and say. Ask yourself why you're doing and saying what you are. Most of your answers will be routine; "I said yes when my boss gave me an assignment because that's my job." But there will be some behaviors loaded with special and important insights. Watch out for them. You'll know you found one when you feel troubled by pondering why you did or said that. Reflect on these situations for the insight and personal growth opportunity within.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Let us not look back in anger or forward in fear, but around in awareness. ~James Thurber
Reflection: We become engaged by our daily events and responsibilities and take for granted all that is around us. There is wonder and love and life surrounding us each and every day, but we'll miss it without awareness. The present, the gift of right now, will soon be past and just a memory. Find the beauty, the miracle, the joy in everyday events by becoming more aware of your surroundings.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
What's the secret to longevity? Five centenarians living in the same retirement community in Missouri claim their secret is hard work at a job they loved and taking care of their bodies. This is reported today in an Associated Press article by Jeff Douglas.
Although the testimony and experience of five people falls far short of the rigid requirements of scientific research-based conclusions, common sense indicates there's some useful information here for all of us.
Fortunately, both factors these women cite, work they love and dedication to personal health, are within our control. Isn't it time we took some action to improve in these areas?
If you're thinking about a life change it's important to understand the processes of change that will help you succeed. See Successful Lifestyle Changes for information to help you succeed at a major lifestyle change.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Welcome to Personal Development Toolkit, a new feature appearing here this week and continuing every Monday. Each week, Personal Development Toolkit will feature a one word tool you can use to construct additions to your personal growth and development. Each week's toolkit will include a brief description of the tool and a suggestion for using it.
Awareness. Paraphrasing Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, Awareness implies vigilance in observing some thing or experience and alertness in drawing inferences from what one observes.
Example: Jeremy was shocked when he became aware that his whining and complaining were causing his friends to avoid him. From now on he will have greater awareness of his effect on others.
This Week: Be aware of your emotions. Several times a day take note of how you're feeling and what stimulated the feeling. Your emotions are unfailing indicators of the degree to which a current experience is in integrity with who you are.
If you're feeling positive it's an indication that you're being true to yourself. Negative feelings, of course, indicate the opposite. The rule of thumb is to keep doing things that bring you positive feelings. Some will bristle at this, believing that it's selfish to strive to feel good. However, when we feel good we're healthier, more energetic, more creative, and better able to reach out to others. We're also more fun to be around.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Maurice Clarett was the starting tailback as a freshman for the Ohio State University Buckeyes NCAA national championship football team of 2002. In story-book fashion, Clarett, who grew up in a tough neighborhood of Youngstown, Ohio, graduated from high school with a B+ average, finished early to begin his college career, and scored the winning touchdown in the National Championship game in front of millions of national TV viewers.
He seemed to have made excellent choices, a role model of personal development. But personal development is all about choices, and unfortunately, Maurice started making different choices.
Since his high point in 2002, Clarett was suspended by the NCAA, left college, failed in a headline-grabbing lawsuit against the NFL, broke some "minor" laws, failed to make an NFL team, broke some "major" laws, and along the way fathered a child with his girlfriend.
Clarett's personal development and deterioration clearly stem from the choices he has made. We often liken life experience to a story. Clarett clearly has written a personal rags to riches to rags story of his life. Perhaps future chapters will describe his rise again, but for now we're left with a sad chapter of a fallen hero and troubled young man, and a young father in jail.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
We've all had the experience of forgetting something we've known for years: a friend's name, the title of a favorite song, where we left our keys, etc. Put those common occurrences together with knowing an elderly person with dementia and a brief memory lapse becomes a frightening glimpse of future mental deterioration.
Head for the gym, the mental exercise gym, as August 9th's article Stay Mentally Sharp describes the benefits of mental exercising.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Well, you did it. You finally got control of the self-defeating habit of many years and now it's time to enjoy the new you. But first, lets review the entire change process, summarizing and highlighting the important stages and processes in Successful Lifestyle Changes.
It will come in handy as you wow your friends with the details of your major overhaul.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
If you're like most adults you've lost weight many times, only to return to your previous weight or even higher. The same goes for other difficult life changes, such as smoking cessation. As one smoker said, "Stopping smoking is easy, I've done it dozens of times."
Remaining a non-smoker or sustaining your weight loss requires knowledge of helpful processes that will keep your hard won success. We explore these in Keep the Pounds Off, an article on successful maintenance.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
The series of articles about successful life change continues on July 19th, with the fourth stage of change: Action. You've thought about losing that weight, you've visualized the slimmer you, you've planned your weight loss strategies, and now you're ready for action.
Take Action to Change describes the processes you'll need to succeed through the action stage.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
The series on life changes: losing weight, smoking cessation, alcohol moderation, or reducing credit card debt continues on July 12, with an article on Preparation. Studies show that proper preparation before jumping into Action will increase our odds of success. The series continues with Preparing for Life Changes, published July 12th.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
The first in my series of life-change articles based on James Prochaska's book, Changing for Good, is Lose Weight for Good. The series continues this week with Changing Your Life, published June 28th.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Successful change in behavior, such as losing weight, stopping smoking, or controlling anger, requires that we go through six stages. And the processes we use to change, our support network, rewards, and public commitment, will only be effective if we use them in the correct stage(s).
Lose Weight for Good, reviews these critical components of successful change as described in James Prochaska's book, Changing for Good, A Revolutionary Six-stage Program for Overcoming Bad Habits and Moving Your Life Positively Forward.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Yoga is good for your heart. A study of 103 heart patients showed that those practicing yoga in addition to standard medical therapies experienced a small but significant decrease in blood pressure and similar small decreases in insulin and glucose levels. This news was reported on June 12, by Associated Press writer Carla Johnson.
Though the yoga method tested was Transcendental Meditation, which funds much medical research, I believe the meditation techniques you and I can easily do are likely to have the same effect. Why? Meditation takes us within, to a place of calm, peace, love, and connection to our source energy.
A human being's natural state is healthy; I know it doesn't seem that way with our dependence on medications, but studies such as this are showing us that natural therapies improve health.
When we are optimistic, positive in our thinking, focused on peaceful, calm, loving behaviors and feelings, we are healthy. Try it.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Yoga, like meditation, thoughts of gratitude, and acts of kindness can bring you near-instant improvement in attitude, stress-relief, and peace of mind. Researchers are finding more and more scientific proof of the health benefits of yoga and other attitude-improving tools of daily life.
There's no need to worry about having enough money in your retirement if you don't live long enough to reach it.
Yoga, meditation, gratitude, and kindness are all easy, free, and available to each of us. These easy and available tools of better living will help you to feel better, be healthier, and will contribute to a more peaceful environment for you and those around you.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Are you saving for retirement? The Center for Retirement Research estimates that you will need 73% of your pre-retirement income to live comfortably in retirement. Furthermore, the Center estimates that 43% of Americans are at risk, meaning they will lack this level of income from post retirement resources.
That's a pretty disturbing report.
I've always subscribed to the "pay yourself first" philosophy of money management. By taking 10% right off the top of each paycheck and investing it, you learn to live on the remaining 90%. When you get a raise or a bonus, take an even larger cut for yourself, 30% or more, and invest it.
If your company offers a 401K or 403B, take full advantage of it. Invest your maximum allowable in IRA's. Take control of your income and outflow stream, so you won't be in that 43% at risk for poverty in retirement.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Much was made of June 6, 2006, supposedly the day of the devil because it was 6/6/06 and 666 is apparently the devil's signature. 6/6/06 was projected to be a day of catastrophy, perhaps even the day of the apocalypse. Couldn't prove it by me. I had a great day, a euphoric day. See my Euphoria article.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Research shows that benevolence is healthy. That's right, acts of kindness have been shown to reduce stress, increase happiness, and bring greater health to the giver. For a dose of euphoria, deliver an unexpected act of kindness to someone today. You'll feel great.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has."
~ Epictetus ~
My most astounding experience with the benefit of gratitude was a practice I happened upon that eased my transition from a hectic day at work to a peaceful, enjoyable evening with family. On my drive home I would ask myself two questions,
- What went right today?
- What did I learn today?
Before using this process, my drive home was spent focusing on anything and everything that did not go well during the day. When I arrived home I was still consumed with thoughts of what I should have done or could have done. My resulting state of mind was negative and troubled. Not a great way to greet my loved ones. Certainly not a conducive state of mind to genuinely listen to the day's events from wife and children.
After starting this two question process on each day's drive home I found that my focus was much more positive; what went right was (modestly) celebrated and what didn't go right was a learning opportunity. This brought me closure of my work day well short of arriving home, allowing me to be in the frame of mind I really wanted to be with my family.
Though this is my personal experience, research studies are showing that both health and happiness improve with regular thoughts and acts of gratitude. See Gratitude and Your Health. for more on this topic.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
I've had a lifelong relationship with fear. I suspect that is true of many people. Fear has not been my friend, at least I didn't think of fear as a friend until just recently. What if fear was my friend? Have I been overlooking a good friend right by my side all this time? My May 17th article may offer a new way of looking at fear.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
I'm sometimes amazed at the conversations going on in my head--my self talk. I've found myself taking a possible future event, something negative, and talking about it as if it had already happened. When I do that, I can see myself becoming afraid, angry, and resentful. All because I allowed my self talk to reinforce what started out as a slight fear of some future event. Has this ever happened to you?
I'm hosting a discussion on May 18th, at 7 PM ET on Overcoming Fear. For more information and to register.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
If you have had big dreams, exciting ideas for new things in your life, only to have the cold chill of fear stop you in your tracks, watch for May 3rd's article, Overcome Fear.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
We cannot grow personally without reflecting upon who we are, what we believe, and what we've learned. April 26th's article reflects upon reflection as a tool for personal development.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
I love secrets, but only when I know the secret and others don't. That's why so many books and articles (mine included) will tease you with the "Ten Secrets of Success," or "Seven Secrets to Becoming a Millionaire." If I buy the book or read the article before you do, then I can get ahead of those who don't yet know. It's a competition thing.
So you might think I'd be above teasing you with an article about the secrets of success...but I'm not. April 19th's article Secrets of Success shows how you, too, can be a success. Don't miss it. If you read it first, think of the advantage you'll have.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
I recently re-connected with a boyhood chum named Joe. Joe is a great example of how regular people can grow to what many would call stardom by applying just a few secrets of success. April 12th's article, Success By Real People highlights Joel Conrad's journey from rural Ohio to Broadway. His story is a wonderful example of real people succeeding. You can too.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
China, a huge nation of growing strength and international influence. A future super-power according to some experts. Many of the non-perishable products of daily living seem to be made in China. But Personal Development? April 5th's article may surprise you with the latest "made in China".
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Knowing I would have a long (3 hr) drive returning from a book signing event, I checked out an audio book, Dr. Wayne Dyer's The Power of Intention. Though I had scanned the hardcopy some time ago, I found the audio book very powerful and insightful. I recommend this book if you're serious about becoming the best you can be. Dr. Dyer is often featured on PBS broadcasts, too, which is a good way to get acquainted with his style and beliefs.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Why are you interested in Personal Development? This week's article is a whimsical compilation of my top ten reasons for personal development. I'm sure your reasons are lots better than my list suggests, so jump right in and enter your top reason in the discussion link. There's even a prize!
Posted by Jerry Lopper
There are definite and proven health benefits to regular meditation: improved immune system, lower blood pressure, stress reduction, increased energy, and more. Visit WebMD or other respected medical information sites for more on meditation health benefits.
Posted by Jerry Lopper
Watch for the next article coming this Wednesday for a discussion of meditation, including a basic meditation that's great for beginners and the experienced meditator. Thanks to all of you who are contributing to a lively discussion of purpose. We all benefit from discussions such as these.