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A Further Celebration of Sexuality

© Alyssa Skye

Some of the most enjoyable times that I recall from my childhood are those moments when I would be running pell-mell, full-throttle, without-a-care-in-the-world through a meadow or playground or anywhere for that matter. I can remember the wind rushing through my hair; my body cutting a path through the air as I imagined I was a cheetah or other fast animal. Those were the times that I was completely open to life and experiencing all that it could offer me on all levels: the physical, the emotional, the spiritual.

Now that I'm older, I've realized that I rarely experience such profound moments of openness to what life holds for me. I seem to wander through most of my life being guarded and wary of the bliss that I once felt as a child. While this is most likely a result of too many constrictions placed on me as I was growing up, it is definitely a handicap. Luckily, it is a handicap that can be repaired.

In researching materials for this site, I came across a book which brought this to my attention. And with my revelation, I discovered that, if I can once again tap into an openness to life's experiences, I will be able to enhance my sexuality as well. Of course, accomplishing this might not be as easy as it sounds, but I'd like to share these suggestions with you.

First of all, think of something which brings you intense pleasure. Try to recall all that you can about the moment. Concentrate on what you are hearing, seeing, smelling, feeling. (To help you become more attuned to your senses, spend time every day focusing on at least one of your senses as you complete your routine. For example, as you walk to your car, identify the smells around you or feel the touch of your clothes on your body.)

After you identify what you're feeling during your moment of pleasure, determine whether or not you're concentrating on the mechanics of your task. Most likely, you're going with the flow, finding a rhythm to what you're doing. Worrying about technique and mechanics causes a restrained feeling and can inhibit you. Drawing a parallel between this experience and sexual intimacy, it becomes clear that relaxing into the rhythm of the moment will enhance your ecstasy rather than hindering it.

Now that you've become tuned into your senses and learned to go with the flow, the next important step is to open to your sexual experience. Don't try to control it. Rather than straining to reach what many consider the only reason to be intimate, the orgasm, instead let yourself enjoy all of the other pleasures which happen along the way.

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