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Hello Baby! Part One

© Alyssa Skye

After talking to many new Moms lately, I realized that we all seem to share the same concern: since the arrival of baby, our sexual selves have seemed to vanish. It's no wonder that this happens when we stop to consider the new adventure we have just undertaken. Recovery from childbirth, sleepless nights, numerous diaper changes and feedings, seemingly fewer hours in the day (and night), a wonderful new person who needs constant nurturing and care. Not to mention the fact that estrogen, the hormone which influences our sex drive, is produced in lower levels after the baby's birth, causing vaginal dryness and decreased sexual interest.

What can we do to reconnect to our sexuality during this period of adjustment? First of all, and most importantly, is to be patient with yourself. Whether this is your first or your fifth child, adapting to a different routine is always stressful in the beginning. Give yourself time to learn the ropes of your new life without putting pressure on yourself or your partner to immediately resume sexual relations(of course, if you feel you are ready, then go for it, but be sure to follow your doctor's or midwife's instructions on healing).

For those women who have allowed themselves time to recover but still have no interest in sexual relations, I recommend taking a step back from the situation and learning to reconnect with your inner self before reconnecting sexually with your partner. There are many different ways to achieve this. Here are some of my favorites:

DAILY AFFIRMATIONS

A woman undergoes many changes both physically and emotionally during pregnancy and childbirth which can leave her feeling negative about her self-image and even depressed. In order to boost self-confidence, try a dose of daily affirmations. There are numerous books where you can find specific affirmations or click on this website "http://dencity.com/tawlist/Affirmations...." for links to some good affirmation sites.

EXERCISE

Many women have a difficult time viewing their postpartum bodies. Let's face it. A sagging belly and cellulite-laden legs can really affect our self-image as well as our sexual feelings, but there is something that we can do about it. As soon as your doctor or midwife gives you the okay, start exercising. Begin with simple activities such as head lifts or kegels, then slowly work your way up to more difficult ones (see "http://epregnancy.com/info/fitness/postb..." ). Try to take a walk with or without baby each day. Fresh air is a wonderful spirit booster.

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