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I Don't Need A Man - Page 2

© Nancy Coulter

Yes, servant. That's what we believed we were supposed to do. Raise his children, keep his house clean, take care of everything in his life. That was what being a woman was all about.

When my parents divorced, my mother had to take on the role of single mom. She was a single woman on her own, raising 3 young children. However, she didn't stay single for that long and did remarry less than a year after the divorce. This was something that confused me. I couldn't understand how my mom could go from being completely disappointed and let down by one man, and then go on with another man. So I guess in some ways, my mother wasn't the perfect example of an independent woman. Maybe that's why it's taken me over 20 years to realize that I don't have to depend on a man for my existance.

The sad thing is that there are many women out there, older than me, who haven't come to this realization yet. They still believe that they need their man to survive. They'll stay in a bad situation just because they are with their man. No matter how badly he treats her, she feels that she must stay with him - for no other reason than she can't be on her own.

The fact is that we all want someone to share our life with, but we don't need that person in order to be ourselves. No one should depend on anyone else for their existance. Far too often I've seen girl friends of mine bounce from boyfriend to boyfriend simply because they can't stand to be single. They may not admit it, but it's something that is very clear to those around them.

So as depressed as I may be with the fact that I'm currently labeled "single", I'm content with the fact that I'll be ok. I'll go on and live my life and everything will be ok. I can live on my own and take care of myself, without relying on anyone for their complete support. If I can do it, than anyone else can.

People are wonderful. Relationships, love, companionship, support, comfort - those are all important parts to a happy life. However, those things can be so much better once you are able to have a good relationship with yourself.

We all want to find that "special someone", but we should want that person for the right reasons. Not because we feel that we have to have someone to be dependent on, but because we want to share our life with someone else. Whether you are a man or a woman, that should be the drive behind searching for Mr. or Miss. Right.

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