A Fresh New Start: One Step At A Time as an Independent Woman


© Teresa Brouwer
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The New Year is focused around New Year’s resolutions, setting goals, losing weight, and trying something new, but the Easter holiday represents rebirth, starting over, and new beginnings.

The colors of spring symbolize peace, softness, and comfort. And each of us deserves to have peace, softness, and comfort in our lives. Although, there may be certain situations and issues that we face everyday, there comes a time when we must step forward and make a change and start over. The best way to make a change is to take baby steps.

Don't try to tackle everything at once. It will take time to get an apartment, go to college, have a career, write a book, buy a car, and save money.   To help you prioritize your goals, answer the following questions:

1. If you could change one thing what would it be?

2. What do you have to do to make that change?

3. What is the first thing you feel that you need to do in order to get out of the abusive relationship?

4. What resources do you have in your life to help you make the change?

5. Is it all about money? Do you have contacts or can you get in contact with people to help you?

6. Did you know that you could write your own legal separation agreement and file it at the county clerk’s office?

7. Why aren’t you writing it?

8. What are your dreams?

9. What do you need to do to fulfill those dreams?

10. What have you always wanted to do with your life?

11. Why aren’t you doing it?

12. What is the first step you need to make in order to get out of your situation?

13. Have you told anyone what you are going through?

14. Do you have a support system? Consider looking at the Suite101 course, “How To Survive An Abusive Relationship”.

15. Make a list of your ideal lifestyle. Maybe you want to own your own home or a car. How about a career? Have you thought about being a stay-at home mom? Maybe you would like to have a family pet or go on your ideal vacation?

The first step can be to answer the above questions. Take your time with the answers. Write your answers in a journal or a sketchpad. There are no right or wrong answers to these questions. Everyone’s situation is different and we all live our lives differently.

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