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Online Relationships

© Jessica Cuba

If you're reading this you probably have at least two things in common with most of the rest of my readers:

1. You enjoy the Internet.

2. You are involved in a serious relationship (or are close to someone who is)

3. You're related to me (this group, while large, is smaller than the first two.)

I have talked to many people who began relationships over the Internet (good and bad ones). It's generally a good guess that the guy my sister is out with started as an Internet relationship. However, sometimes I'm caught by surprise when I hear that a couple began in a chat room.

I attended a wedding shower for my cousin last week. He and his fiancee have been dating over four years and seem a perfect match. I never would have guessed that they started their relationship online. After talking to them I wanted to share some of their story for two reasons. I'd like for many of you who have heard cautionary tales to know that there are fairy tales. I'd also like you to know that real fairy tales aren't often like what we want them to be - you need to keep your head on straight in any relationship. With that in mind, I bring you a story with lots of lessons.

This couple met in a chat room as college freshmen over four years ago and became friends. They were in different states and dating other people.

Good Idea - Just like in the offline world, it's often the unsought romances that endure. Good Idea - Teen romances are hard enough, the Internet adds a difficulty level.

After a year of talking almost daily, he moved into a town where she had a high school friend. They set up a meeting. Both saw the potential for a relationship, but were dating other people.

Bad Idea - It's generally a good idea to have a friend nearby when you meet for the first time. Good Idea - After a full year of daily e-mails and chats, they knew eachother pretty well. Good Idea - They did not act on impulse, but met as friends. Good Idea - Both say that this happened before the Internet was a common as it is today. If they had met two years later, they would have been cautious to the point of potentially never meeting.

Fast forward to the time when neither is attatched. Once they decide to go out, he visits her state. When his vehicle breaks down, she rescues him with disapproving friends in tow (after all, they've only met once).