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Simple Hobbits Have Lots of Friends - Page 5

© Michael Martinez

Lotho made a mess of things, though. He clearly didn't root out all the opposition when he took over the Shire. When Saruman showed up a few months later, the ruffians and Half-orcs flocked to his side and returned to their old boss. Most likely Saruman had been more generous with the wine and the pipeweed. Reports say that Isengard was well-supplied with these items. Lotho, having little experience in running the family business, was not prepared for the counter-coup. Saruman sent his own messenger boy, Grima Wormtongue, to take out the little dweeb. The Isengard organization then started to munch down on the Shire. Shakedowns became the order of the day. Saruman simply took control over the puppet government and expanded its law enforcement services to ensure that his laws were obeyed. The Shirriffs became a terrorizing army of thugs controlled by the Isengarders. Things looked pretty grim. And then Frodo returned. If there's one thing Tolkien understood, it was that any Hobbit who could take out a Dark Lord shouldn't have any trouble dealing with the nitwit who had lost his own organization down south. Saruman may have been bigger than Lotho Sackville-Baggins, but he wasn't half the Hobbit that Frodo Baggins was. As soon as Frodo returned the Hobbit families began to organize. A new resistance was born. The Tooks started taking back their old turf. Frodo himself oversaw the hit on Saruman. It wasn't long before the Shire was safely back in the hands of the Old Families. And the old way of life was quickly restored. But the good days weren't destined to last long. There was now a King, and he began sending people north to put his affairs in order. Frodo, the best hit man the Hobbits ever had, read the writing on the wall and he booked passage on the next ship over Sea. The Shire was never the same after he left. The King realized that Hobbits and Men just didn't mix very well. An investigation into Shire family businesses revealed that they controlled the pipeweed trade, and that Shire weed was preferred even in Bree. Worse, the Hobbits' ability to run gangsters from Isengard out of the woods proved to be alarming. What if they got ambitious? Well, all that may seem a bit of an overread, but it occurs to me that perhaps the gamers' desire to impose a couple of local thieves' guilds on Middle-earth isn't all that out-of-line after all. Tolkien was obviously a wiseguy who wanted to blow the lid off a corrupt and intransigent organization. He obviously changed the names to protect the innocent, but it's easy enough to show that The Lord of the Rings is heavily influenced by the medieval origins of the Mafia, and that it's just an allegory about the perils of living in a society where organized crime has taken control.

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