Does Barliman Have a Beard? And Other Important Fannish Issues - Page 7


© Michael Martinez
Page 7
People ask me if I have a problem with Fonstad. No, I don't have a problem with her...as long I have Tolkien's books to consult. But try persuading folks not to bring her into a discussion of Middle-earth geography. And let's not even get into Barbara Strachey. Sorry, folks. There's no substitute for a Tolkien map. Fonstad also took on the difficult question of just how many men fought in the battle of the Pelennor Fields. Um, the correct answer is, "We don't know." Tolkien didn't tell us. So, what the heck. We'll just make up some numbers and go with them! Yes, if Tolkien's absence of denial doesn't prove there were really only 50 hill-men at Minas Tirith and that 1,000 men came up the river with Aragorn, Fonstad's well-reasoned "estimates" do prove these numbers. Okay, she's the only author in print to offer any numbers. Maybe there's a reason for why even J.E.A. Tyler didn't stick his neck out and suggest there were X number of "Guard of Minas Tirith" (who are the Guard of Minas Tirith anyway? -- what the heck, Tolkien didn't say there wasn't such a group, so Fonstad must be right again!). Anyone is free to guess, but that's really all we can do: guess. Make up numbers. How Fonstad got promoted to an authority on Tolkien's armies (she's a cartographer, not a collaborator) escapes me. Of course, the old Rohirrim argument raises its head every now and then and someone points out how the Rohirrim were really just Anglo-Saxons because Tolkien used Old English to represent their language. Sauron spoke English in the book. Does that make him the Queen of England? Or, worse, is he the Prince Consort? Tolkien said his use of Old English to represent the Rohirrim doesn't mean they were actually to be identified with the Anglo-Saxons. Not to worry, Professor Tom Shippey assures us: Tolkien is a liar. What a profound sense of reasoning! But nonetheless, Shippey's conclusion is presented as the absolute proof positive that Tolkien's Rohirrim are Anglo-Saxons. Tolkien really didn't know what he was talking about. So, if Tolkien didn't know what he was up to, then why should we settle for the deplorable answer to the all-time greatest most often-asked Tolkien question: What was Tom Bombadil? Tolkien merely said he was an enigma. Nothing more. Nonetheless, people have tried to prove he was Aule, Manwe, Iluvatar, a manifestation of the Earth, a Maia, an Elf, something else altogether, and J.R.R. Tolkien himself.

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Here's the follow-up discussion on this article: View all related messages

7.   Nov 29, 2000 1:31 AM
In response to message posted by deathammer:

You all are a gift from Heaven! Once again I got slammed elsewhere for trying to poke fun ...


-- posted by Michael_Martinez


6.   Nov 28, 2000 8:18 PM
I must say that you have just successfully taken all the fun out of these silly arguements over little picky details. One conclusion that I have arrived at is that for any question concerning a middl ...

-- posted by deathammer


5.   Nov 27, 2000 12:43 PM
It's true, I do. Let me take the relevant book off the shelf, and open it to the correct page. See what's written there? That's what he wrote, and that's what he meant to directly convey to the reader ...

-- posted by proudfoot


4.   Nov 27, 2000 7:34 AM
After a rough month or so of mixed LotR movie news, this article did a lot to clear my mind and remind me that, when all is said and done, Tolkien's writings (and all derived works) are enterta ...

-- posted by mkletch


3.   Nov 26, 2000 6:37 PM
In response to message posted by silvan:

All true. I read 1 mailing list and 3 Tolkien related messageboards and you have described many ...

-- posted by Finduilas





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