Each week, I’m going to showcase a humorous piece of writing. This week we’ll start out with some true, and probably not-so-true technical support calls. In all cases, the humor is meant to entertain and not offend anyone in any way.
I’ve collected these over the years, so some of them may be VERY old. Some of the technology may be obsolete but the humor is still there.
Enjoy.
TECHNICAL SUPPORT CALLS
Novell Netwire and Computers with Cup Holders?
Tech Support Representative: Hello, this is Tech Support, How may I help you?
Caller: Hello, is this technical support?
Rep: Yes, it is. How may I help you?
Caller: The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed.
Rep: I’m sorry, but did you say a “cup holder?”
Caller: Yes. It’s attached to the front of my computer.
Rep: Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped. It’s because I am. Did you receive this as a part of a promotional at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?
Caller: It came with my computer. I don’t know anything about a promotional. It just has ‘4x’ on it.
At this point the Tech support rep muted the caller because he couldn’t stand it. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off the drive.
Compaq’s Famous Calls
- Compaq is considering changing the command “Press Any Key” to “Press Return Key” because of the flood of calls asking where the “any” key is.
- A Compaq technician received a call from a man complaining that the system wouldn’t read word processing files from his old diskettes. After troubleshooting for magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was found that the customer labeled the diskettes then rolled them into the typewriter to type the labels.
- Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new computer wouldn’t work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged itin, and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked “What power switch?”
