Imagine: You're hard at work when someone comes through the door of your classroom and hands you a note. You glance at the neatly-penned message...from the parent of that "problem" student. Mrs. "so and so" has called and wants to speak with you...or worse, will meet you after school...gulp. Your confidence ebbs as you imagine all the worst.
Sound familiar?
Well, the above imaginary scenario doesn't have to come true for you if you learn the art of parent conferencing!
What to do before the conference:
1. Clarify [especially effective for the "worriers']
If at all possible, find out what the conference will be concerning while you have the parent on the phone. It is perfectly acceptable to inquire so that you can be prepared. You may even phrase the question to implicate that you need to know what records to bring.
NOTE: Always bring a notepad and a pen or pencil so that you can jot down notes. Doing so not only will help you to remember suggestions and advice that the parent offers or any "promises" that you make, but also makes you look more prepared, more concerned, and more professional.
2. Prepare Records/"Evidence"
If the parent is most concerned with conduct, be sure to bring documentation of disturbances, office visits, unfinished assignments, notes passed in class, etc. in addition to your recorded conduct grades. The more "proof" a teacher has, the less likely he/she will find himself defending his word against Mrs. "So and so's" darling angel's [not] word!
3. Organize Points/Comments
Now is the time to reflect carefully on what you will say. Of course, it is impossible for a teacher to anticipate every parental question or comment, but based on his/her experience with conferencing, he/she should be able to formulate some ideas and plans. I jot down the main points that I feel need to be expressed on an index card to take with me so that if I get sucked into conversation and sidetracked, or worse, if I get upset and feel flustered, I can stick to the main topic: their child's problem and a possible solution.
4. Diplomacy 101: Practice the "Sandwich Technique"
While planning your topics, be sure to carefully plan some of your comments. While it is important to present the problem objectively and honestly, it is CRUCIAL that your comments not infuriate the parent or put him/her on the defensive. Since most parents who attend conferences care about their children, it is important to approach the situation with tactfully. The "sandwich technique" discussed in some of Gary Smalley and John Trent's books on relationships suggests that you:
Well, the above imaginary scenario doesn't have to come true for you if you learn the art of parent conferencing!
What to do before the conference:
1. Clarify [especially effective for the "worriers']
If at all possible, find out what the conference will be concerning while you have the parent on the phone. It is perfectly acceptable to inquire so that you can be prepared. You may even phrase the question to implicate that you need to know what records to bring.
NOTE: Always bring a notepad and a pen or pencil so that you can jot down notes. Doing so not only will help you to remember suggestions and advice that the parent offers or any "promises" that you make, but also makes you look more prepared, more concerned, and more professional.
2. Prepare Records/"Evidence"
If the parent is most concerned with conduct, be sure to bring documentation of disturbances, office visits, unfinished assignments, notes passed in class, etc. in addition to your recorded conduct grades. The more "proof" a teacher has, the less likely he/she will find himself defending his word against Mrs. "So and so's" darling angel's [not] word!
3. Organize Points/Comments
Now is the time to reflect carefully on what you will say. Of course, it is impossible for a teacher to anticipate every parental question or comment, but based on his/her experience with conferencing, he/she should be able to formulate some ideas and plans. I jot down the main points that I feel need to be expressed on an index card to take with me so that if I get sucked into conversation and sidetracked, or worse, if I get upset and feel flustered, I can stick to the main topic: their child's problem and a possible solution.
4. Diplomacy 101: Practice the "Sandwich Technique"
While planning your topics, be sure to carefully plan some of your comments. While it is important to present the problem objectively and honestly, it is CRUCIAL that your comments not infuriate the parent or put him/her on the defensive. Since most parents who attend conferences care about their children, it is important to approach the situation with tactfully. The "sandwich technique" discussed in some of Gary Smalley and John Trent's books on relationships suggests that you:
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