Reflections on the Beasley Case
But I do hope that the Beasley case will serve as a wake up call to those involved in surrogacy. I sincerely hope that the government leaves it alone (I am sure there will be much anti-surrogacy legislation in the coming months, my hope is little of it ever makes it past initial introduction or discussion), but I also sincerely hope Surrogates and Intended Parents alike view this case - and the others that have made headlines - and learn.
First, be very careful whom you choose to pursue a surrogacy arrangement with. This should go without saying, yet it seems to be overlooked a little too often. In the rush to get started and get pregnant and get babies and get going, too many parties - Surrogates and Intended Parents alike - overlook early red flags or little voices inside questioning things. If you're using an agency, find out the specifics of how they screen their Surrogates and Intended Parents. If you're doing this on your own, take this seriously. Imagine if you were hiring a nanny to take care of your child at your house: would you agree without having met them in person? Would you accept them with no references or background check? When it comes down to it, Intended Parents are hiring a childcare provider, albeit a little earlier than most parents worry about babysitters! And the Surrogate is giving up a portion of her body and her life to the Intended Parents; she should know who they are before agreeing to this.
Second, don't assume everything will go smoothly. Of course this is everyone's desire: a quick conception, healthy pregnancy, easy delivery, and bouncing baby at the end. And this happens all the time. But so do unexpected setbacks. Surrogates can take a long time to conceive (boy do I know that!), can end up with a high-risk pregnancy on bed-rest for months, or - horrible as it is to imagine - deliver a stillborn child or one with severe medical problems. Or they may conceive more babies than the Intended Parents are prepared to handle. These are all things that can - and do - happen, and to ignore them in the hopes they won't is not a coping strategy. These situations - and many more - should be discussed beforehand and put into the contract. I wrote a separate article on things that should be
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