Finishing the Race

Well, I did it! The triathlon was last weekend - a week ago today, actually - at Disney World in Orlando, Florida. I wasn't in the top 50, but I finished the race.

The morning started at 4 a.m. I got up and got ready, since we had to meet the ferry at 4:30 a.m. to get to the race on time. It didn't register that we would be swimming in the dark. At 6:30 a.m. they started the first wave of swimmers. We were the fifth wave. I felt a rush of exhilaration as I hit the water. The swim was going to be my strong point. Less than one minute into the race, I realized something was wrong. I couldn't see and since I had practiced in a pool, wasn't used to people pulling me under to get by me. It was unintentional, hardly anyone could see ahead of them, but once I drank a mouthful of lake water and came up coughing, I was a little scared.

In the pool, if I had problems I could put my feet down. Here I couldn't. But I was determined to finish. I dragged myself through the swim, feeling sorry for myself. I was going to have a bad time of it, I thought, if this was my "strong" leg of the triathlon. For a minute I thought about giving up. But, I needed to finish, just to prove that I could do it. So, I finished the swim and started toward my bike. My friends husband's screamed encouragement at me. I noticed Kathy and Eileen's bikes were already gone, but I didn't focus on that too much. I knew they were much faster than me.

Once I got on the bike, I was proud of myself. I had pushed through the first barrier. The rest of the triathlon was home free! And even with the horrible swim, I still finished in less time that I had ever done in our practice events!

I learned a lot from my triathlon. I learned that I could take control of my life and achieve the goals I set for myself. I learned that I could push through obstacles to get to where I wanted to be. I learned that I can feel strong again, and that I am not a victim. I don't recommend that everyone do a triathlon to prove this to himself or herself, but I do think that finding a goal and achieving it is an important step to take in recovering from a traumatic event.

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