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As children grow towards the adolescent phase or teenage-hood, they are stigmatised with fluctuating and difficult moods what may seem like erratic or risky behaviour. Most of this, we as adults having been there ourselves, can recognize these as symptoms of the emotional trauma of leaving childhood behind. But because we have been there ourselves doesn't make it easier sometimes to cope with. We tend to forget what it was like and what we needed at that time. Many of us turned away from our parents or the other adults around us and sought comfort and support with our peers. We can however stay close to our teenagers and provide them with the support and help they may not know how to ask for, as they wend their way into young adulthood.
What teens need:
2.To feel appreciated. 3.To feel competent. Give them opportunities to assume responsibilities and to help others, to achieve and feel pride. 4.Positive feedback and encouragement. Look for their strengths and support them to use them. 5.To feel autonomous and have a sense of self-determination. They must feel they have some control over what is transpiring, especially in their school -work. Let them in on family decisions. If they believe they are always being told what to do and how to behave, they will be less enthused about engaging in activities that they feel are imposed upon them. They try to oppose and it leads to power struggles. 6.Good relationships with adults. Youths who have access to and conversations with caring adults are less likely to engage in at risk behaviour. Help young people to feel like they matter and that they can make a difference. Be accessible. They tend to perform better in school and have stronger reasoning abilities. 7.They need adults to have a positive view of them. Do not trivialize their concerns, feelings, and perspectives. Stop saying they are just going through a phase. 8.They need adults to take them more seriously by becoming more understanding and accepting. Treat them the way you expect to be treated, with complete respect. 9.Time and emotional space to deal with loss, setbacks and disappointments. Later adolescents experience despair, concern and uncertainty about moving into adulthood. They need help to deal with these feelings. They also need help with understanding and showing other emotions. They need to learn how to show affection and how to receive it. Expressing anger in a safe way is also difficult for them. Be a good model of how to appropriately express feelings -positive and negative ones. Go To Page: 1 2
The copyright of the article What Teens Need in Emotional Intelligence is owned by Marilyn Robb. Permission to republish What Teens Need in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.
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