Drowsy Drivers Beware!
© Kerrin Leon White
In the early hours of the morning after an office party, you are driving home, dead tired. As the designated driver for four coworkers, you had to drop each one off before you could go home. You also had to spend the evening nursing a couple glasses of wine. You are sober but sleepy. In fact, you can hardly keep your eyes open. Trying to wake yourself up, you roll down the window, turn up the radio, and reach for a pack of gum.
Abruptly, you notice a police car behind you, lights flashing. You pull over, wondering what you could have done wrong.
“You were driving like a drunk. I saw you crossing back and forth between empty lanes three times. Have you been drinking?”
“Hardly,” you say, “I had the bad luck to get selected as the designated driver for four other guys.”
You readily agree to a breathalyzer test. It turns out negative. You give silent thanks for limiting yourself to those two glasses of wine, early in the evening.
The patrolman regards you thoughtfully.
“You look pretty tired,” he says. “Do you usually stay up this late? I mean, you don’t work night shift or anything like that?”
“You bet I’m tired!” you exclaim. “I’m used to going to bed by 11 p.m. and what is it now--2:30 a.m.”
The officer looks straight at you, not at his watch.
“Actually, it’s a little after 3 in the morning,” he says. “Would you be willing to take an eyeblink test?”
“What’s that?”
“Something new,” he says. “It measures sleepiness. Don’t you follow the news? It came out a month ago.
Do you refuse to take the test?”
“Go right ahead.” His manner has made me suspect that it would be unwise to refuse. “I don’t have time to keep up with the news. Too much work lately.”
“Working hard, huh? Hard enough to cut short on sleep?”
You nod with a rueful smile. “Just this past month. We have a big project and a short deadline.”
The officer administers an unfamiliar test. It takes only a few minutes.
You think to yourself that maybe you made a mistake, not keeping up with the news.
Studying his instrument, he says, “It confirms that you are extremely sleepy, half asleep as they say. Did you know that it’s now illegal to drive when you’re sleep deprived?”
This startles you. What’s going wrong with the world?
“Why would they make such a law?” you exclaim. “It’s outrageous!”
