A Guide (of sorts) To Getting Over It - Part Two

By now, you have grown as a person. No longer sad and somewhat pitiful, your head is reeling from this injustice that has been delivered. "I will make the jerk pay!" you exclaim. Your friends begin removing all sharp objects from your house. Warning: this is not the time to make plans to deal out some sort of retribution.

Unless, of course, it's of the harmless variety.

I know of one woman who, when going through a lengthy breakup, had to live with her Ex for a couple months until they sold their house. She decided she would be "sweet" and do her boyfriend's laundry. For months after the fact, he bragged to friends and co-workers alike how much his Ex adored him: even down to the last painful moment, she washed his clothes. Or so he thought.

Her best friend is taking the secret to her grave: the Ex would remove all of his dirty laundry and refold them, placing them back in his drawers. Especially rewarding to her was the evening he had his date pick him up at THEIR house - the Calvin boxer briefs he thought looked so cute on his butt had been there at least three times previously!

All that said, it will probably make you feel even better to let go of the anger, the bitterness. Not every relationship is meant to last - if you look at it as an episode in your sitcom/soap opera life, you may begin to appreciate what it brought you in the way of experience, good memories and lessons learned. You will also begin to look forward to the next "episode." What feels like anxiety at being alone should be viewed as excitement for the future. You never know what lies around each corner you turn.

Eventually, you will come to realize that the best revenge is living well. Of course, this doesn't occur naturally at first. Do not fret, however. It won't be long until one morning you will wake up and make it all the way to 3:45 in the afternoon without one single thought of your Ex. And the days following will become much easier. Work to make them so - Get a new hobby. Flirt a little. Take a cooking class. Join a book club. Work out. Buy a pet. Keep your friends close at hand - lean on them for a while, that's what they are there for. In other words, get out of yourself and live a little. Who knows? You may meet that someone whose eyes don't glaze over when the topic isn't them, someone who makes you laugh and sees things in a different light. You may be happy again. (Believe me, you will.) But most of all, you'll be yourself, with or without him - a quality that is very attractive to others. Eventually, you will move on to the best post-breakup stage: acceptance. Let the glow of loving yourself and loving life be your sweetest revenge!

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