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2003

© Erin Kinloch

Dec.15 2003 marked my one-year anniversary as a single parent. I remember when everyday seemed overwhelming; now I rarely feel that way. When I first became a single parent, I wasn't sure how to proceed. I had given up a lot in my relationship with my child's father. I was pretty confused and had no confidence in my ability as a parent, let alone as a single parent. When I look back, I don't know how I got through the year alone and want to share my small victories with you.

· I recently have been diagnosed with arthritis; this battle went on for over a year. I started my time as a parent in a lot of pain; walking or carrying my son was very difficult. The doctors first thought I had Lupus but now say it is arthritis. My joints are still sore but my quality of life has definitely improved.

· After a year and a half of exercising despite pain, I have dropped three sizes. I am now the size I was before I became pregnant. This makes me feel good and I continue to pat myself on the back for this accomplishment.

· When I became a single parent, most of my friends had moved on. I have successfully rebuilt two of my former friendships and made two new friends I am close with. This was hard but life is so much more fun with friends to share it all with.

· I took a parenting class and learned many useful methods of disciplining my child and how to cope with stress. I also learned the importance of playing with and listening to your child. This class offered another positive that I didn't realize until I finished, interacting with other parents and learning that even two parent families have struggles.

· I sought out counsel to try to make sense of my former relationship and realized the negative impact it had on my life and self-esteem. I feel really good about the person I have become as a result of my self-examination.

· My last step of the year was to try dating again. I was scared to death but now I know even if it's not a love connection I enjoy the human interaction. After spending the majority of my time with my child, it's fun to break out and go spend time with adults. I have not yet found love but I am having fun.

This year has brought many joys and struggles. One of the fun things has been writing on Suite.101. There are so many wonderful people in this community, my hats off to you all. This next year should be interesting as my goals continue to grow. I am starting to really enjoy pushing my own limits to see how good life can be. I wish everyone a Happy New Year and best wishes for 2004.