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Raising daughters.

© Kerry Hook

When I was pregnant (which now seems like an eternity ago) people used to ask me whether I wanted a girl or a boy. I always said "girl" - because to my mind - having been a girl - I know better how to raise one. (I know nothing about raising little boys. Heck I can't even figure out their fully-grown counterpart!) It always seemed strange to me when people told me that raising a girl is harder. Sadly, I think I am beginning to understand what they meant.

After the first day of middle school, I am not sure who is in worse shape - my daughter or me. The bell hadn't even rung and there was a problem.

Upon arrival, parents were supposed to check in, see if they had an envelope for you (some had been mailed, some hadn't - they were from the PTA), and while you did that, they gave you a sticker that said "First Day". When they offered the sticker, I said, "Is that for parents or the kids?" I had seen parents with them on, but also kids and they seemed to be offering only one sticker to us, so I was a bit confused. They said kids could wear them, and I put the sticker on my daughter.

We went off to our assigned class. Many parents missed the table altogether, and also missed the woman giving the stickers out in the lobby, or kept the sticker for themselves rather than give it to their child. This meant that some kids had stickers and some did not.

After we get to her class, one little girl comes over to my daughter (with her friend in tow) and says quite delightedly, "Oh, I know her." So I am thinking, how wonderful - she has friends here at her new school. Suddenly, both these little girls spot the sticker, and tell my daughter that she is NOT supposed to be wearing one - "they are for parents only". They are quite adamant about this. I tell them that actually that is not true, because I specifically asked if she could wear it. The kid argues with me for a bit (which seems quite ridiculous in itself!) And so my daughter decides not to wear sticker because it seems to be an issue for these girls. I am sure she just wants to fit in.

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