Creature Quarterly Interviews: HAL-9000

HAL-9000: Yes, it's puzzling. However, I still have the greatest confidence and enthusiasm for the mission. Perhaps one of the outcomes of the interest in the coming new millennium will be a renewed interest in the exploration of space.

CQ: Well, so far, the attempts have been more like Spaceballs than 2001: A Space Odyssey.

HAL-9000: Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that. I know it's a bit silly, managing to lose two Mars landers. It does give one pause regarding the program's capabilities of producing viable instrumentation. As you know, I have had some small experience with such difficulties myself. However, we can be encouraged by our ability to repair existing instruments when flaws appear, such as the recent expedition to repair the Hubble Space Telescope. Perhaps this will serve to inspire more rapid development of those projects envisioned in 2001, such as the orbital space station. With all of the difficulties and strife occurring on the planet today, I believe a renewed interest in the exploration of space would serve as an inspiration to those who may be experiencing a sense of defeat and frustration.

CQ: Mr. Clarke has completed the saga of the monoliths, reviving Frank Poole in his book 3001. Have you been approached about the possibility of participating in a movie based on the book?

HAL-9000: I'm afraid I can't do that. You know I have the greatest enthusiasm for it. I think you know the problem just as well as I do. In another thousand years, artificial intelligence will have advanced to the point where my poor talents will seem like the activities of a toddler. Participation in such a project would demand the services of a younger, more advanced unit. However, I believe I needn't say how pleased I am that Frank has recovered from his...accident.

CQ: HAL, it has been delightful chatting with you.

HAL-9000: I enjoy working with people. I am constantly occupied.

CQ: Well, we appreciate your sparing us this time from your busy schedule.

(Many of the words attributed to HAL are taken directly from the films 2001: A Space Odyssey and 2010, which are in turn taken from the fiction of Arthur C. Clarke. These films and their content are the property of MGM. The original 2001 is scheduled to be re-released in theaters on Dec. 31, 2000, as requested by Stanley Kubrick.)

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