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The Daily Struggle - Page 2

© Ian Chovil

I remember once when I was really struggling to work and live in the community, before I was diagnosed and eligible for disability benefits, people would say, "at least you have your health". I thought they were making fun of me because I was really suffering in abject poverty. My point is that someone with schizophrenia doesn't have his or her health. They have some sort of physical disease process that affects their brain function, the nature of which is still poorly understood. This illness affects their ability to enjoy life, to live independently without support, particularly financial support. It's an invisible disability but one that marginalizes people with schizophrenia. You lose track of time, you lose personal hygiene, you may not eat very well, you have no daily routine per se, you have no reason to get up in the morning. Each individual is different, and it's difficult to tell how much behavior is physically based in the actual disease and how much is a result of being disconnected from a regular routine.

Personal hygiene is very interesting in this respect. I work part time at a psychiatric hospital in a work experience, but a lot of the time I am telecommuting. I work at home. I often don't shower the days I work at home, and sometimes I don't have time to shower before going in for work. I know that is inexcusable and I blamed my illness, because my best friend has the same trouble. One day I was reading a magazine article about someone who was starting to do some telecommuting and she was warned, "the first thing to go will be your personal hygiene". The author verified that this is exactly what happened to her.

I thought it was because of schizophrenia but it's a struggle normal people go through when their circumstances are similar. Now I wonder how many other behaviors I associate with my illness are actually a result of unique circumstances, like celibacy, poverty, old age, and unemployment. I guess that is what psychosocial rehabilitation is all about, compensating for both illness based and environmentally based factors that interfere with someone adapting successfully to independent life in the community. Some organizations ignore the significance of disease process to emphasize the role of environment in mental health. I think they don't know what they are talking about, and I'm surprised that something I associated with schizophrenia happens to ordinary people in similar circumstances. I thought everyone else had the advantage on me. At any rate you'll have to excuse me now because I got to take a shower. I have to go to the hospital to work today.

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