While dating someone is one thing, deciding to become life partners, through a long-term commitment brings on a whole new consideration. It may be appealing to have a girl/boyfriend that is attractive, funny, and charming to your friends, but would that same someone be appropriate mate material? When the topic of marriage comes into a relationship, we need to look at our partners in a more broad light.
A man that is macho may be sexy and passionate, but can he also be warm and compassionate to your needs? Your dating companion may have a great job and offer stability to a home, but are his/her family-orientations in synch with your own. You may have very opposite religious upbringing, but may both value compromise enough to not let that alter your relationship. Without the necessity of enough time together to explore the potentials for your mutual future, it's virtually impossible to make those life-decisions reasonably.
Any couple with the slightest inkling toward marriage needs to be practical and realistic in thinking through and exploring the relations between individual goals/needs and those of the potential wedding candidate. It may seem less romantic to test and interview a partner than to claim love at first sight and no questions needed, but it's vital that any prospective couples really take their relationship on a "trial run" before making the big move. Living together, for instance, may not have been considered acceptable in days of old, but let's face it, how else can two people really anticipate what it would be like to be with someone full time? You may be overwhelmingly in love and want to jump right into marital bliss, but it's almost always a better option to let a relationship ride the weather a bit. You need to experience ups and downs, decision making, compromises, discussions of life goals and expectations, etc. before you can truly know if you stand a good chance of making it work for the long haul. Rushing into a serious commitment is rarely conducive to couple contentment.
The best question I've come across to really tell if you and a mate are ready for a long-term commitment is this: Are your connections stronger than your doubts? If you have more concerns and questions about your partner and your combined future, than you must honestly realize you need time or reconsideration. If the bond between two people is secure enough (which usually corresponds to a relative amount of time to develop), the doubts, fears, unknowns will pale in comparison to what you feel for each other.
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