The enormous psychological pain of giving up these relationships will often make it difficult for the survivor, but if they continue in them, the chances of being reaccessed are great. MOST REACCESSING OF THE SURVIVOR COMES FROM MEMBERS OF THEIR IMMEDIATE FAMILY. This is one of the hardest tasks for the survivor to attempt as he or she learns good boundaries. What those boundaries need to be will differ from person to person, and their individual situation.
Another real, and powerful pull back to the cult, will come from the perception that NEEDS inside the person are being met by the group. The person will likely be dissociative, if they have been raised in a transgenerational group, and they will often have alters inside who have never known or experienced the abuse, who will be considered "high alters" inside.These part's reality is that they were praised and told that they were special, often unaware or not caring that other alters inside endured the abuse. These higher alters may identify strongly with their perps and are often the alters that want recontact with the group and help drive internal recontact programming.
Frequently, when a person leaves a cult group, there is a real period of grieving. Social relations have been changed. Alters with special needs will feel that their needs are no longer being met, whether for belonging, for sexual activity, for power, or other personal agendas. The survivor needs to recognize this reality. A person will often unconsciously recontact a group if they believe that deep needs are being met by this group. Teaching themselves to meet their needs in a healthy and appropriate way will take time and patience, working with a qualified safe therapist who understands ritual abuse.
There may be PROGRAMMING to recontact the group. The survivor will need to identify if this is present, and take steps with the help of their therapist and support system to deactivate it.
IDEAS ON BREAKING FREE
While breaking free can be difficult, as I have discussed above, it is possible to escape a cult group and maintain personal safety. I will share from both my personal experience and that of other survivors things which have proven helpful in breaking free.
1. Safe outside accountability:
If the person attempting to break free can live with someone who is NOT a member of the group, who is a safe person, that will increase their own personal safety exponentially. Cult members from groups such as the Illuminati will hesitate to harrass or try to access someone while they are with a safe person, one who is not dissociative. One of the most dangerous set ups is when a survivor is living alone, or in isolation, or if they talk long walks at night or in areas where there are no people around. Abductions, kidnappings, or reaccessing may occur in these situations. The more safe outside accountability the survivor sets up, the less chance that this will occur. This could mean a safe roomate who is not dissociative; staying with members of a church, finding a safe house, or even a women's shelter (although there are reports that some shelters and safe houses are being infiltrated by cult members; the survivor needs to be cautious in where they go and whom they trust). One grievous problem today is the relative lack of safe houses for people trying to break free of the cult.
