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A Story For Us All


© Amy B. Jeanroy

The following is a story that applies to all our children. I thank Saltkrakan AB, Lidingoe, Sweden for the prompt reply to my request to use the story here..

In 1978,Astrid Lindgren received the German Book Trade Peace Prize for her literary contributions.In her speech at the prizegiving ceremony, she, among other things, told the following story. "When I was about 20 years old, I met an old pastor's wife who told me that when she was young and had her first child, she didn't believe in striking children, although spanking kids with a switch pulled from a tree was standard punishment at the time. But one day when her son was four or five,he did something that she felt warranted a spanking - the first of his life. And she told him that he would have to go outside and find a switch for her to hit him with. The boy was gone a long time. And when he came back in, he was crying. He said to her, "Mama, I couldn't find a switch, but here's a rock that you can throw at me."

All of a sudden the mother understood how the situation felt from the child's point of view: that if my mother wants to hurt me, then it makes no difference what she does it with; she might as well do it with a stone. And the mother took the boy onto her lap and they both cried. Then she laid the rock on a shelf in the kitchen to remind herself forever: never violence.

And that is something I think everyone should keep in mind. Because violence begins in the nursery - one can raise children into violence." I think that too often we fail to feel situations "from the child's point of view," and that failure leads us to teach our children other than what we think we're teaching them.

"Published by permission of Saltkrakan AB, Lidingoe, Sweden, owner of all copyrights to Astrid Lindgren's works."

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The copyright of the article A Story For Us All in Raising Boys is owned by . Permission to republish A Story For Us All in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.

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