Showing vs. Telling

Seems rather simple, but I think most authors still find themselves doing it on more occasions than they like (or even know). "It" being the tendency to EXPLAIN things to your reader rather than having him understand what's going on through dialogue, description, and action. Occasionally this is brought to an author's attention while participating in a critique group (we'll cover critique groups in another article) and more than one reader mentions this criticism. You, of course, are shocked; you had NO idea.

The difference between "showing" and "telling" is narrative summary (no specific setting, characters, or dialogue). Readers need to "see" events unfolding, infer tones and attitudes, not have things DESCRIBED to them. A lot of beginning authors rely on narrative summary to tell their stories. This is far easier than writing a scene, but it doesn't make for good reading.

Now, more so than ever before, it is imperative to learn the difference and rely heavily on showing rather than telling. Readers no longer put up with huge chunks of exposition as a standard for story-telling. If a book is thumbed through and large, unwieldy paragraphs are seen instead of short paragraphs and lots of dialogue, the book is likely to go back on the shelf. This is not me telling anyone how to write, or how to pander to the masses; I'm just being practical and realistic.

Seeing examples is a great way to re-focus the idea of showing versus telling.

• The dog scared me.
• The rotweiller's low growl exploded into a heart-stopping bark. I jumped backward, knocking the chair over on my way toward the door. As useless as my defense was, I kept my right foot poised for the kick. (See? Don't TELL people the dog scared you... SHOW them. Never in the second example do I actually SAY I'm scared of the dog, but you sure get the idea, along with a picture and a feeling.)

• She yelled at Timmy, upsetting him.
• "Shut the hell up, you freakin' little wimp!" Timmy looked up at his mother, tears taking less than a second to form and roll down his dirty face in streams that tracked both disbelief and desolation.

• Mike was a mean man.
• Mike walked with the rest of us, but always two steps ahead, ensuring "first kicking rights" to any stray dogs coming up to us hoping for a scrap of food. Sometimes he teased them before laying a steel-toed boot to them; this bothered me the most, seeing that small spark of hope in the eyes of the starving mongrels... then hearing the yelp.
  The copyright of the article Showing vs. Telling in Publishing Short Fiction is owned by Laura Elvin. Permission to republish Showing vs. Telling in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.

  Go To Page: 1 2

  Articles in this Topic    Discussions in this Topic