Letting Go, Letting In
so you can get over it and move on to a real job, get back on your feet." (Side note: Most people don't know that Walt Disney went bankrupt before he could make his plans for Disney work.)
Yes it's heartbreaking to hear negativity when we continue to need love and support more than we need judgement. But guess what? We have love and support from our own hearts for ourselves and the path we choose! And you know what? I've discovered that the house, the stuff, even the "steady paycheck" are not all that important. And even the "approval" of those who once meant the most to me really doesn't mean all that much anymore. I know my heart in a way that I'd never known it before my son died. And I know what I want to fight for this lifetime.
1) My marriage
2) All we've built with KotaPress
3) Continuing the legacy of Mrs. Duck
I don't need 3 bedrooms for these things. I don't need STUFF for these things. I don't need friends and family with negative attitudes based in fear for these things. And so out the door all the STUFF goes! Donations, auctions, yard sales! Hoorah! And with it all goes these things that once sucked energy from me. Less to move. Less to store. Less to dust and clean. Less to keep track of. Less to worry about. Less overhead. Less need to justify my life to others.
And what has this clearing brought for me? A renewal in the faith and love in my husband's eyes when he looks at me. A faith the Mrs. Duck and her message are bigger than stuff, bigger than me, bigger than the doubts of well meaning friends and family. A mobility we've wanted for a long time. We've long talked about working our "mission" no matter where we are on this Earth. Mrs. Duck speaks just as loudly regardless of the language she uses, you know.
My point here is this: I had to take all the STUFF of my life out of my head and hands and put it on the floor for awhile. I had to randomly open my heart, close my eyes, and point at the things that were left. I had to sit with
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