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Will My Daughter Follow In My Fat Footsteps?

© Mary Ellen Popolo

Many times as I sit and watch my 2 ½ month old daughter sleep I wonder what her life will be like; what she will be when she grows up and what her goals and ambitions will be. As all mothers due, I hope the obstacles and struggles that she'll face will be few.

As she sleeps I wonder if someday she'll be a wife and a mother. If she'll choose a career and what might it be? Will she be a teacher or a maybe a politician? Miss America or a doctor? An architect or a ballerina?

Will she have a weight challenge her whole life like I did?

Being the child of two overweight parents, I'd have to say that the odds weigh heavily (no pun intended!) in favor of her becoming an overweight child, or an overweight adult.

Although for me the drastic weight gain didn't happen until puberty, I don't think there is any time too early to begin to try to help her avoid the constant lifetime struggle with obesity that I myself have never won. Firsthand experience with the trials and tribulations of dealing with a lifetime of being fat, I know that above all else I don't want my daughter to suffer like I did. But is it really something I can prevent?

Some say it's inherited. Some say it isn't. I agree children of overweight parents are more likely to be overweight themselves. But is it really in the genes, or it is because the parents teach their children poor eating habits?

My mother grew up as an overweight child. My grandmother, her mother, NEVER allowed her to eat anything other than her three perfectly planned diet meals a day and maybe a piece of fruit as a snack, maybe. As a result my mother horded snacks in her room and ate junk food at any opportunity. Deprivation of all things good, or all things a child craves, led my mother to a life of sneak eating and binging. As a result she was an overweight child who became an overweight adult.

When my mother began a family of her own she vowed not to make the same mistakes her mother did by forcing her children into that vicious cycle of deprivation and binging. Although she did us a common sense approach to healthy eating, we were seldom deprived of any and all foods we wanted or craved. There was never a time my mother said no to food whether it was second or third helpings of dinner, or an extra dessert. With the freedom to eat whatever and however much we wanted, there were often times when we made less than suitable food or quantity choices. I'm sure you can already figure out the outcome. Although my mom's intentions were good, her theory didn't' work any better than her own mother's. As a result I was also an overweight child who became an overweight adult.