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14. GETTING THE SCENES RIGHT - Part 2

© Sherry-Anne Jacobs

This article is a continuation of article 13, which discussed the fact that once the basic story line is right, one needs to work on the individual scenes that make up that story, to enhance them and maximise their impact. We talked first about changing scenes. Now let's look at a second way of improving them.

2. CHANGING THE POINT OF VIEW FROM WHICH THE SCENE IS PLAYED Maybe you've shown an event through one character's eyes, when actually it might be more vivid to see it through another character's eyes. In my novel LIKE NO OTHER I had the new curate and his family arrive in the village in Chapter 3 and meet our heroine. However by the time I'd finished writing the story another character had become important, so I went back to introduce him in this arrival scene, showing him through the heroine's eyes and then showing his reactions to his first sight of her. They're each attracted to the other, but although nothing comes of it then, I've paved the way for later interactions between them. And it's a much more vivid scene than my first effort was, allowing us to see our heroine in a new light.

Rachel sees Caleb for the first time: Something about the man driving it caught her attention and she couldn't help staring at him. He was very tall, you could see that even when he was sitting on the cart, with a hawk-like profile and eyes that burned darkly, as if he was angry at the world.

Later, he catches sight of her: It was at that moment Caleb Hesketh first noticed her, a strong woman, from her looks, unlike this bleating fool beside him. The sunlight was gilding her hair and she was smiling tenderly, the smile lighting up her whole face.

3. CHANGING INDIVIDUAL ACTIONS WITHIN THE SCENE In JESSIE I had a scene where the local landowner, a bully, forces his daughter to marry a man of his choosing - tying up the ends of the first part of the story because Jessie has now left the man's employment. When I read it through I suddenly realised that I could get a far better scene if I added a bit of last-minute drama to it. This would also leave it open for me to introduce the young woman as a character in another book if I so chose. I may or may not write her tale, but I now have the choice, whereas the other variation on the scene limited that.

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