The general advice on the list -- get the kid out of team sports and put him in individual sports.
But is that the solution?
I think it depends on what the kid wants. Kids are more resiliant than we give them credit for. They handle failure a lot better than mom and dad, and oftentimes will react in a way they are expected to react rather than the way they actually feel. I can't tell you how many times I've left a ball game with a parent ranting about the game and the kid saying, "but dad, we did okay and I had a good time." So maybe it isn't that the kid's self-esteem is crushed by not being the superstar, but rather mom and dad's.
I also believe that it isn't fair to judge a kid's athleticism, especially as they are hitting growth spurts and puberty. Truth is, some kids peak at age 7 or 8, some at 11, others as teenagers, and so on. Look to see if the athlete is improving in each season. It is easy enough to tell.
As for going into an individiual sport rather than a team sport, one has to remember that the name of the game in sports is competition. While a child may not be the best athlete on a team, the focus is still on "team." And individual does not win or lose a team game. (As the saying goes: the first inning is as important as the last inning.) However, in individual sports, the young athlete is going solo. If self-esteem is the issue, how will the child fare with individual losses?
The bottom line: if the child enjoys the sport and is having a good time, let him or her play.
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