Competition vs. Learning

We expect competition on certain levels - in professional sports, in college sports, even in high school sports. But should fourth graders focus solely on the winning vs. losing aspect of a sport, or should they focus on the learning?

This is on my mind because my son has the chance to experience both this winter. In our town, we have an orgazniation called Pioneer Basketball, which, once you get past the second grade, is competitive. There are regular games. Score is kept. MVPs are named for each game. There are practices each week, supposedly to help each child's skill, but since practice falls the day after the game, that hour is usually spent focusing on the team's mistakes. The idea is to do what is needed to win, not improve each child's capability, or focus on each child's strengths and weaknesses.

At the same time, he was invited to join a private league, a group from his elementary school and run by a classmate's parent. This league, said the letter, will focus on skill, not competition, although they will play in game situations for a short time each meeting time. After all, the skills are worthless without game time.

This week, the first week both of these "leagues" have been meeting, I've watched my son go from concentrating on learning to concentrating on to competing.

Both are essential. Healthy competition - and done right, sports is one of the healthiest versions of competition - is good for kids. But kids also need to learn basic skills. It is a fundamental that gets forgotten a lot in today's fast-paced world. Look at soccer, for example. Too often, kids are thrown on the field without a clear idea about what they are expected to do.

The role of the parent is to make sure this balance is met. We, as parents, must evaluate what our kids are doing. First of all, they must be having fun - that's the name of the game, right? But, you know, often, we parents are sinking a lot of money into our kids activities, and it is only fair that the kids get something valuable out of them. Take time to watch practice. Is your child learning? Are his/her skills improving? If not, don't hesitiate to confront the coach privately. Sometimes the coach's hands are tied; he's following league rules. If that's the case, and you want your child to gain skills, look into alternatives.

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