I NEED TIME TO MYSELF

Here’s a puzzling question. How could someone want children so badly and love their children so much; and want to NOT be around them all the time?

After we moved to Washington, I started feeling overwhelmed. I think it was a combination of moving, unpacking and taking care of 2 babies – who were becoming more and more demanding.

Around this same time, I started having headaches every day (occuring at the same time every day). I suspected the headaches could be due to a change in altitude from Texas to Washington. I’m not really sure there is a difference in altitude; but it sure sounded like a good reason.

So, off I went to a doctor to ask him about my headaches (and get a yearly checkup at the same time). I asked him about the change in altitude and he looked at me like I was nuts. Then he told me something that I will remember forever and will tell to new moms over and over again. The doctor sat me down, looked me in the eyes and said, “Carrie, you are the primary care giver for 2 little babies. They take a lot of effort and time to care for. You must constantly be on task to do for them what they need. This is why you are getting headaches. You must start to take some time for yourself. Go for a walk, join a gym that has day care; do something for yourself. Take time for your self."

Wow, what great advice!! I remember it to this day. Now that the boys are 9, it’s way easier to have time to myself; but when they were little it was harder. I never did join a gym, but I did do other things. While they were napping, I would sit down with a drink and read a book or the newspaper. While they were napping, I would go outside and just sit. When my husband got home from work, I would go for a short walk. I would join other mothers of twins at Chuck E. Cheese once a month and let the boys run. I joined a Mother’s of PreSchoolers (MOPS) group that met once a month. The boys would go into their own class and I had 2 hours to myself (and 30 other moms) to chat and do crafts.

So, what is my advice to new moms of twins (and singletons)? Don’t feel bad about wanting some time to yourself. You deserve it and you need it. Go for a walk, join a club, meet friends – do whatever you need to do to keep your sanity. I hope you all don’t end up with headaches like I did; but if you do – it’s probably that you need some time to yourself to unwind and catch your breath – and probably not the altitude (although I still think that sounds like a good reason).

Go To Page: 1 2

Articles in this Topic    Discussions in this Topic