STILL PRE-TEENS

Hormones!!! Why didn't anyone tell me that boys have emotional ups and downs just like girls? Why didn't anyone tell me that sometimes they have these feelings more often than girls?

Actually, I would count us lucky, because I do have a great friend who has told me all the things we will go through with boys. My friend Julie has 2 boys, one 2 years older and one a year older. Everything she has gone through with her boys, she has told me about. She has also given me hints and ways to deal with their emotional things. It's like having a my own private guru, someone I can turn to when my boys are acting crazy!

So, what is the best piece of advice that I have gotten from her? Sometimes you have to just ignore the way your kids are acting. Yup, you heard me; when it comes to hormonal emotional rants and raves - sometimes you just have to ignore them. I always find it's best to not just ignore them, but also a good idea to leave the room. Run away as fast as possible.

OK, I'm being a bit flip here and I certainly don't condone just ignoring your children when they are trying to sort through their feelings. But it really does work to give your children some space. They need time to sort through their feelings before they are willing and ready to talk about what's bothering them. And if you just push and push, they might never open up and tell you what's wrong.

Another piece of advice Julie has given me; talk to your children. Get things out in the open and be frank about what you are discussing. I used to think no way can I talk with my boys about hormonal things, but it actually comes fairly easily. And, yes it's best to just talk things out and keep it all straight and forward. Don't mince words, don't use euphemisms; get right to the point.

Last year my boys had sex education in school; and I freaked out. No way did I want to have to discuss anything related to that with my boys. Julie and another friend told me to not worry and just be "open" with them. So, I sucked it up and we discussed a bit. Turns out they really didn't have that many questions and I worried for nothing. But since then, whenever they have a question; we discuss it openly and freely. It's a good thing to be able to talk about "anything" with your children and not be nervous or worried. But, remember, it's also a good thing to sometimes just walk away and talk about things later.

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